40 Things Every Woman Must Know About Men, Love, Sex and Relationships
edited: Saturday, October 08, 2005
By Gillis Triplett
Rated "G" by the Author.
Posted: Saturday, October 08, 2005
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Most women learn about men, love, sex and relationships the hard way. They walk down the highly traveled, worn out path of emotional scars, broken hearts, abuse, confusion, anger and sleepless nights. When it comes to learning the hard way, you can get to know a great deal about men, love, sex and relationships, but most women who have traveled that path will tell you, “The price is too high and the consequences and lingering effects are way to painful!” Smart women understand this irrefutable truth.
They know there is an easier less complicated way to obtain the vital information they need to know about the opposite sex. Ladies, these 40 nuggets of wisdom and sage advice will help set you on the right path to finding and experiencing true love. Share these life-saving truths with every woman you know. They will forever thank you!
1. There are two types of males: Dishonorable males and honorable men. Don’t date or marry until you know how to tell the difference between the two! The woman in the mirror will graciously thank you.
2. Honorable men are protectors. They will guard your heart, protect your emotions, defend your honor and stand as champions for your spiritual, mental and physical well-being; choose an honorable man and choose life!
3. You are not a car; if you meet a man who wants to test drive your physical body, emotions and feelings, point him to a car dealership, bid him adieu and don’t look back!
4. This is a true saying: “The soul of a woman is fragile.” Please note: dishonorable males refuse to respect this crucial truth. They will toy with a woman’s emotions without any semblance of concern or compassion. Therefore YOU must guard your heart from these cold-hearted males with all diligence.
5. Good men need to be treated like good men, dishonorable males, need to be let go and left alone!
6. OK ladies; you’ve met this great guy, but he’s got a child or children for which he does not take care of, provide for or see to. Follow these instructions to the letter: urgently send him back to the mother(s) of his child(ren) and don’t look back. Don’t make the same mistake the mother(s) of his child(ren) did!
7. Dishonorable males treat sex as a sport, females as trophies and children they sire as wastepaper. Never allow yourself to become their next score, mantle piece or sperm repository.
8. Women who hold grudges, seek vengeance, cling to bitterness and are unwilling to forgive, unwittingly break their own hearts!
9. Choose the wrong mate and you might as well have laid next to a boa constrictor or grabbed the ears of a raging mad pit bull. A smart woman learns how to choose her mate wisely!
10. Heed the sage advice of some caring brothers and honorable men. If he doesn’t fit - don’t force him, just relax and let him go. Destiny is on your side… TRUE LOVE will find you!
11. Momma’s boys belong with only one type of woman; their moms! Ladies, these mothers and their sons will never cut their grotesque umbilical cord. Therefore, for your sake, leave them alone and just let them trot home to their mommies.
12. Self-love: if you don’t have it, pull yourself off the market. Make no mistake about it, if you don’t love yourself, NO MAN can ever love you… no matter how great a man he is.
13. Don’t judge ALL men by one man’s actions; unless you want ALL men to judge you based on the acts of amoral women.
14. Most women learn how to choose a mate the hard way; they go through a gut wrenching string of emotionally detached males, jerks, pimps, thugs and players. Don’t become one of those heart broken and bitter women! Learn how to properly choose a mate before it’s too late! The woman in the mirror will graciously thank you.
15. You wondering, “If I move in with him, is he going to marry me?” Answer: “Not likely!” Don’t believe it, take these two critical tests: (a). Ask any honorable man! And, (b). Examine the ever-growing list of disillusioned women who are begrudgingly waiting for their non-committal live-in lovers to pop the big question.
16. Do you keep attracting men who are dogs? Check the scent you’re putting out. Men who are dogs are attracted by scent!
17. You are not a man! Therefore, you will never be: a role model for men, a father figure, a man’s mentor or a man’s coach. If a man has lacked proper male leadership in his life, kindly send him on his way. Know for a certainty; he is not prepared for the responsibilities that come with love, sex, relationship and marriage.
18. If you don’t know what a misogynistic man is, take this time to check your dictionary. For your sake, sanity and safety, avoid these treacherous males at all costs.
19. Don’t ever delude yourself! Your beauty, fine body, sexual prowess, cooking skills, femininity and vibrant personality will never be enough to change a man, NEVER!
20. If your potential mate does such things as: promises to call you but doesn’t, makes dates and breaks them, shows up late or plays games with your emotions; take notes ladies... those are clear cut warning signs that he DOES NOT value you, he DOES NOT love you and he DOES NOT care about you!
21. Angry, bitter, hostile, combative, unforgiving single women, become: angry, bitter, hostile and combative, unforgiving wives.
22. A fundamental understanding and respect of the male ego is a must for all women who want a vibrant and healthy love; DO NOT obtain this crucial information from dishonorable males or from angry bitter women.
23. If you choose to be with dishonorable males, pimps, players, thugs, ballers and shot callers, you have absolutely no right to complain when they torch your emotions, abuse you, leave you pregnant and alone, jeopardize your safety and otherwise harm or hurt you. Remember, you have freedom of choice and you chose to be with them!
24. When a man is trying to find himself, kindly bid him adieu… PERMANENTLY! He can find you, but can’t find himself? He shouldn’t be looking for love… he should be searching for the map to Mastering Manhood!
25. OK; he wants or is demanding sex but you are not his wife. Write this down: There is no need to wonder, debate or contemplate: he DOES NOT honor or respect you!
26. Spoiled women are like spoiled milk, spoiled meat, spoiled fruit spoiled bread and spoiled brats. Get the picture? Don’t become a spoiled woman!
27. Expecting a dishonorable male to do the honorable thing is like expecting piranhas not to devour you if you make the mistake of diving into their water.
28. You’ve asked these questions, “Why doesn’t he call me more often? Why doesn’t he pursue me more diligently and why doesn’t he show me that he loves me?” Answer; he’s not into you! If you don’t let him go and move on with your life, you will allow him to hinder or block your true love from finding you!
29. All men ARE NOT dogs! Don’t believe, repeat or perpetuate that rampant lie! You will hamper your ability to see and discern the good men who cross your path!
30. Some males like to hit women. It gives them a sense of power and control. If you give yourself to one of these abusive males, most assuredly you will become a punching bag and a floor mat. It is critical that you learn how to detect and avoid these cretins!
31. Promiscuous immoral women are not worthy of an honorable man. They never have been and they never will be.
32. Never allow emotionally embittered women to influence you concerning the male gender. If you do, their hatred and unforgiveness will become yours. Soon you will find yourself suspicious, indignant and angry at all men.
33. You were not designed, built or destined for abuse, whether: emotionally, physically or financially. If he is an abuser, there is no need to deliberate… he IS NOT the one; leave him now!
34. Some women live their lives vicariously through the women on “Girlfriends, Sex In The City and Desperate Housewives.” Don’t become one of these women. If you do, you will make a literal mess of your life, emotions, physical body and well-being.
35. When a man truly loves you, he will honor and respect you. If he doesn't… don’t deceive yourself and don’t allow him to defraud you; he DOES NOT love OR care about you!
36. Everyone has skeletons in their closet? Wrong! Not everyone has skeletons in their closet. Don’t start putting any in yours!
37. There is a vast difference between sex and love. Most men know the difference and you had better learn it fast! If you fail or refuse to do so, you are surely headed for relationship or marital crash and burn.
38. Don’t deceive yourself, once you have sex with a man who is not your husband… he may never admit it, but he has lost a degree of respect for you. Don’t believe it? Ask any honorable man or virtuous woman.
39. The dismal cycle of breaking up and making up only works out in the romance novels, television shows and movies. If you are riding that emotional roller coaster get off right now! Your heart, mind and soul will forever thank you.
40. Nothing is more beautiful, captivating, attractive and sensual than a woman with a gentle and peaceable spirit!
Web Site: Relationships 101
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|Reviewed by Emmanuel Uchechukwu (Reader)
|How can a man know the woman that love's him?|
|Reviewed by Sarah Urban (Reader)
|Very insightful and so true. This would be a great guidebook for young women coming into dating age. Great advice!!|
|Reviewed by emi livel (Reader)
|Thank you so much for writing this article. I absolutely agree with the advice you have given, confirming my own observations :) Self love, YES!
|Reviewed by Cynthia Buhain-Baello
I enjoyed this article immensely. Fun to read and very informative.
|Reviewed by Patricia Guthrie
|How can anyone resist a title 40 things a woman should learn about men.
What I found so fascinating is that I've dated and / or got close to almost all of the jerks on the list. "After God knows how many years
i've spent with losers I finally found an honorable. me. I consider myself fortunate. I enjoyed myself immensely. LOL
|Reviewed by Carlos A latin guy (Reader)
|First of all, please forgive my poor grammar level, Im not good at english but I want to give an opinion about this article.
1.-Is soooo "easy" to divide men in honorable dishonorable, but, in the reality is so hard to identify them. The "clues" you've given are not enough to know a man deeply. Many men are great actors. Don't be innocent, please.
2.-I'm so sick and tired of listening insinuations about sex as a favour from women to men. Pleaaaase!!! if you go to bed with a man, you should do to for your own pleasure and decision, not for his... and if that's the case: PAY THE PRIZE, don't ever feel like you've been used abused and all that &.&%$. Easy, if you don't want sex don't have it.
3.- "Check the scent you’re putting out". For me, is not about scents, it's about whore attitudes.
4.-"once you have sex with a man who is not your husband… he may never admit it, but he has lost a degree of respect for you" TOTALLY DISAGREE! No comments, this so retrograde
5.-I'm so sorry about the woman who wrotes this article, she suffered a lot for sure in her fight to get "a great man" ... that's the prize of being ambitious, you can perceive it line by line. That's all
|Reviewed by Zahra Sal/
|This article is like a degree from a university and I am surprised by the knowledge of this writer about the qaulities of mne. The classification of men's qualities in the varties, and types are prefect. I wish I was capable to describe them same as this author. In general men are unpredicatable and you never know or understand whether they are your enemies or friends but what I envay some women are how to give a hard time to them. Zahra Sal/|
|Reviewed by Annette Hendrix Williams
|God bless you; I give you a standing ovation! Thank you for saying what I want to say but in spite of being an articulate person find hard to express. Before I read this, I had to find your picture to get an idea of how old you are or what your ethnicity was, but it does not matter. Your admonitions are perfect for anyone in the American culture that I am aware of. If I could or were brave enough, I would love to print copies and pass them out in parking lots, but I have no printer. Iam sure that I will tell someone about you though. God bless you again and again!|
|Reviewed by Reginald Johnson
|I am going to ask my daughter to read this article. It gives sage, poignant, and realistic advice … that is applicable to any woman interested in keeping her heart, soul, and feet on level ground. Although you have asked women to “look in the mirror”, I took a peek in it as well … and found myself in total agreement with your analyses.
Reginald V. Johnson
|Reviewed by Jose Molina
|Remember Eve... Adam was a nice guy|
|Reviewed by Josh Phillips (Reader)
|Most of this is valid. Some of it isn't though. It resounds in my ears with the same old tune: How to be a man. Except this article just puts it in the light of informing more (already confused) women what to watch out for. My case is more of the Beauty and the Beast scenario. I grew up with an abusive past. My life has been reshaped though, but the abuse did much to my confidence. I am fairly good looking; at least people comment that I should have an agent, and say something to that sort all the time. I can be rather vain at times, and find myself in how I look, and by at least attracting attention. I never approach women, and I shy away. I'm extremely wary of rejection by the opposite sex, and don't risk much concerning the issue. The strength that I have built up is without role-model, except maybe God. So, the strength I have is based on my faith: I cannot find strength anywhere else, cause my family is "all" dysfuntional. They are either alcoholics, or don't know what man is themselves. I don't want to have sex with a bunch of women, and I am never on the hunt. There are women, that have made hints about sex, when I do go out, but I find my way to avoid them. But, my desire is to find love; love that will last. I am like a little school-girl with a crush, when I meet women. I fall in love with everyone, and always get my heart broken. I can't help it. I believe, personally, that a woman does help a man find himself. Before a man finds a woman, he is just a male person. If he lets her, she'll shape him (hopefully she's a respectful and caring woman). Good women bring hope to men like me. Women that are looking for the top 40 are looking to be loved, which, intrinsically, isn't against nature. But taking it a step further, a woman who is looking to love, and not just to be loved. Let me find it? I want a woman that I can trust and feel safe with, and know that she knows all my weakness, and about my sordid past, yet cares deeply. The last, number 40, sounds like a line from the New Testament of the Bible. Let me tell you, the church doesn't have it all right either, concerning many things. Only God does. Number 40 is correct. But some of the warnings against certain kinds of me (maybe not the punching bag one) are too harsh. For instance, the one about the lack of role model. How is any man that comes from a fatherless background going to break away from that and begin a new generation? I really believe that good-women help men (good men): They also help good men to be better. My hope is to find a charming and beautiful woman who wants more than stability, and, or adulation from a man. A man can learn how to be a good man by her. Some women just make a man want to be the best he can be: Without her, a man is mostly lonely, and doesn't feel like much. A great woman makes a great man feel great. It's all up-hill until death comes. Personally, I need someone to pick me up. There are times I may throw a tantrem, or express resentment, maybe even sound like a "misogynist," but I'm not: I'm just broken. To me, if a woman puts away all her natural inclinations to be a fixer, then she isn't much of a woman herself. She is a female person. Sorry, although the theme (about the good man, and some of the more positive notes) was good, there were just a few things here that offended me. I believe that men need to take back their self-worth, and stand up against all of the bickering against us saying, "BE A MAN"! Where is the helper. American men are not handling the whole broken home thing very well. Women at least grow up with a female role model, being that 90 percent of single-parent homes are run by women. They know how to take on the world. Men are losing it. It's being taken away from us. . Unfortunately, females with only a woman role model, and no father, don't know how to relate to men, nor how to give them respect (that whole ego thing), so they're damaged too, whether they know it or not. The decline of American men in school, and performance in America is clue enough for all you good women: WE NEED HELP! Anyway, on a more harsh note: The world ain't pretty. The writer needs to pull his head out, and come to the conclusion that we are all messed up; we're all doomed to death, and if there is going to be any good thing to come out of it, we must help each other in our dysfuntional worlds. What the hell is love all about anyway. The writer has no grasp.
|Reviewed by Isabella Ward
|How authentic! Accurate and true…If anyone is offended by the truths revealed in this article, maybe God’s trying to tell them something and they may need to wise up …be still… and listen. Every scenario described in these 40 things is true for somebody. I believe it is good to learn that most (bad) relationship issues are “common” to man …because it enables us to live in the light of truth. We need to know what hinders us from living our lives more abundantly …hidden shame…bring it into the light and let it go. Not just sage advice for women (although, we need it more often than not), but some good men are mistreated by women in similar ways as described here. Bless you for telling the truth… and may it help to …make us free.|
|Reviewed by xxxxxxxxxx yyyyy (Reader)
|How very true, pity I didn't know all that starting out
|Reviewed by E.D DeLoach
|WOW! That was a mouth full. I needed that even if I fought out a little too late. I hope to read the entire piece soon.
|Reviewed by Julie Donner Andersen
|I was enjoying this article until this:
"23. If you choose to be with dishonorable males, pimps, players, thugs, ballers and shot callers, you have absolutely no right to complain when they torch your emotions, abuse you, leave you pregnant and alone, jeopardize your safety and otherwise harm or hurt you. Remember, you have freedom of choice and you chose to be with them!"
Um...not in all cases. Some men don't start out as abusers but charm themselves into a woman's life and then start the abuse. Women should NEVER EVER blame themselves for abuse. They are victims...period. To state otherwise is like saying a rape victim deserved it just because she kissed.made out with the rapist, got him all hot and bothered, and then said NO.
"38. Don’t deceive yourself, once you have sex with a man who is not your husband… he may never admit it, but he has lost a degree of respect for you. Don’t believe it? Ask any honorable man or virtuous woman."
What planet are you from? Women aren't the only ones with past histories of sexual experience there, fella. Virgins do not own the market on virtue. Most sexually active women I know are plenty virtuous, respectable, and honourable people.
|Reviewed by Afiya Watkins
|Amen!!! This should be required reading for woman starting from adolescence.|
|Reviewed by Richard Orey
|WOW! The information in this article is dynamite, Gillis!
Every woman should read your "40 Things" before making even a temporary commitment.
Every man should read your "40 Things" so that he knows why every woman should read your "40 Things" before making even a temporary commitment.
I invite every reader to also read the article posted on my den page entitled, "Love."
How have I missed visiting your den before, Gillis? I won't let that oversight continue.
With great respect,
|Reviewed by Loretta Scott
|What a beautiful awakening, thank you.|
|Reviewed by Ch'erie de Perrot
|Ahem, where were you, and or this article when I was 18....:)
Some incredible sage advice offered in 40 ways.
Must send this to my 23 year old daughter, who still thinks the J... she is with is going to pop the question! He has let her down several times already, and torments her further by carrying a ring around in his backpack.
If I could I would clunk him on the noggin.
Yes well, I shall sent this immediately lol, hope she reads it reeeel good.
|Reviewed by Peter Paton
My Mum always maintained that all men are bastards !
|Reviewed by Sarah McIver (Reader)
|Interesting interpretation of what the ideal man should be and what the 'dishonorable' man is. Personally, I don't think it is as clear-cut. Relationships are something to be nurtured. They require hard work on both sides. Success in relationships results from honesty, trust and respect, not to mention forgiveness. It has to be said that men are not the culpable ones all the time. Nice article though. Sounds like it's from the heart.|
|Reviewed by Hiren Shah
|Very comprehensvie writeup. It seems you have had a bitter experience with men. How exactly someone is is something that one can know only by living with him and unlike India, at least in the United states you have the option of live-in relationships before marriage to know how compatible one is with the other just as one has to actually attempt a job to know how well one is suited for it.Sometimes when changing jobs and marriages, one tends to exchange one type of problems for another. At other times who is honorable now can become dishonorable tommorow. All in all, women deserve to be treated with utmost dignity and respect one feels sad coming across such dysmal projection of men.|
|Reviewed by m j hollingshead
|Reviewed by Tracey O'
I want to Thank you so Much for this article. They are so right on. I'm going to send this one on to friends and I like the part of listen to Honorable men about the guy you're with. Hind site to all the warnings I got from them about this one. It's almost in some of these like you're looking into this house with no curtains. 11 1/2 long years. I love the way you keep reminding not to judge all by one Each person/being is an Individual and noone should be placed in a category which so often happens both sides, all people included.
Thank you again so Very much. Very much.
Tracey xoox (c :)