If I were King of the World
edited: Saturday, January 08, 2011
By Paul H. Kogel
Rated "G" by the Author.
Posted: Friday, December 21, 2007
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What's all this talk about, anyway?
If I were King of the World, the first thing I’d do is nuke all the rainforests of the world. Yep, just wipe them all out in one grand nuclear explosion. Then we could all just get on with discussing something else, something important.
I'm joking, of course, but I’m so tired of hearing people talk about the stupid rainforest, even though it does sound very inviting that we all begin living our lives like mound-dwelling hobbits.
It’s almost as bad as all the talk about Global Warming. Gore makes me sick, with all his lecturing about a so-called problem that, even if we did collectively decide to tackle, there really isn’t anything we can do about it anyway. At least nothing that would amount to more than lowering the world temperature by a fraction of a fraction of a percent.
And what’s all this talk about Ozone depletion? You know I actually heard a couple talking about this "problem" just the other day in a restaurant. Hasn’t anybody told anybody yet that they have discovered that these continuous expanding and contracting holes in the upper atmosphere are natural and serve a good and useful purpose? They suck out all the bad air polluted mostly by volcanoes and natural saltwater evaporation. The holes may even clean up all the man-made air pollution caused by jet planes, automobiles, liberal hot air and what have you. They are God’s vacuum cleaners. Why in the world would we want to stop that, and how would we even go about accomplishing such thing anyway?
They say, “We must 'save' the planet.” As King of the World, I say, “The whole world is my ashtray.”