Join (Free!) | Login  

     Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
   Services MarketPlace (Free to post!)
Where Authors and Readers come together!


Featured Authors:  Dr. Stanley Crawford, iElizabeth Parker, iAaron Cole, iJames Boyle, iHank LeGrand, iEugene Meyer, iJames Milward, i

  Home > Arts/Entertainment > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

gael greene

· Become a Fan
· Contact me
· Articles
· Stories
· 9 Titles
· 4 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
Member Since: Jul, 2007

gael greene, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.

Featured Book
Val's World Featuring The Family Unity Roundtable
by M. Pritchard

Val is excited because she wants everyone to communicate with their families positively. She introduces The Family Unity Roundtable and shares some of her favorite recipe..  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members

Featured Book
The Devil's Path
by Richard Turner

A Long Hidden Secret. An Unseen Enemy. A Dangerous Quest for the Truth...  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members

   Recent articles by
gael greene

Shedding Tears of Joy over the Pea Soup of Spring
Borough Food & Drink:The Shopper's Special
Park Avenue Summer
           >> View all

My Predictions for 2008
By gael greene   
Rated "PG" by the Author.
Last edited: Monday, December 31, 2007
Posted: Monday, December 31, 2007

Share    Print   Save    Become a Fan

Bobby Flay and Mario Batali will go toe to toe with new burger chains...

Bobby Flay and Mario Batali will go toe to toe with new burger chains. Bobby’s will feature chili fries, guava shakes, jalapeno ketchup and life-size cutouts of Bobby at the grill. Mario’s will offer spleen burgers, gorgonzola-salumi melts and deep-fried polenta cubes in a paper cone made from a map of Friuli. Daniel Boulud’s solo Bowery Burger will include a slab of foie gras and shards of dark chocolate on toasted brioche with apricot chutney and optional béarnaise sauce for his American fries.
Alain Ducasse will ink a deal to put his name on upscale non-perishable “Survivor” foods to be sold only at Saks Fifth Avenue, with Vuitton totes containing wind-up flashlights, portable radios, dehydrated Fiji water and a wallet with a combination lock for holding a stash of Euros.
Jeffrey Chodorow and Frank Bruni will have a food fight in Madison Square Park televised by the Food Network. If Bruni loses he will be required to review restaurants in Des Moines for six months. If Chodorow is the loser he will be forbidden to open a new restaurant for three weeks.
Anthony Bourdain will be challenged by a handful of amateur x-treme eaters, with the loser sentenced to actually cook at Les Halles for a month.
From the thousands of children addicted to the Food Network will emerge a prepubescent prodigy whose cooking skills are so amazing, Jeffrey Chodorow will back his restaurant in the space where Wild Salmon failed. There will be no special menus for adults.
Restaurants with dead-of-night-in-the-forest lighting and being menus with miniscule lime green type must supply headlamps to all senior citizens.
To prepare for an evening of dining out, coaches will escort you to a Times Square subway station at rush hour where you will attempt to have a conversation. You will be quizzed on the content.
Restaurants that feature pounding music must, by law, text message menu specials. Aging Luddites who do not have cell phones will get loaners.
Waiters will present a written resume and a list of their favorite dishes to preclude annoying and unprofessional chitchat which they might otherwise indulge in. These documents may be ignored. Waiters may sit down at the table in an empty chair only if invited.
All smugglers of illegal immigrants will be required to teach at least one word of English for survival, “Enjoy.” Those who arrive legally must learn this at the airport before going through customs.
Each restaurant will be allowed one “enjoy” per table per evening. Violators will be pelted with stale bread and inferior focaccia.
Restaurants will staff roving dining “tutors” to stop by each table with a five minute “Tabletalk” on the provenance of each ingredient on the menu. Before ordering, you will be quizzed on the content.
Conceptual Dining will become the rage. The pleasure derived from the dish is found in its description alone. The dish, in fact, does not exist. A small fee will be charged.
Small Plates will give way to no plates, a trend for even healthier portion control. All food will be served on oak leaves, in clam shells or onto your outstretched palm.
The Beijing Olympics will inspire new food fads: Like candied love apples on a stick, haw berry shakes. And egg fu yung on a burger roll.
Wine makers will dose their generic table wine with immunity boosters, smart herbs and attach a siphon for sipping while biking. The trend will henceforth be known as “imbiking.”
A breed of black-footed pigs from the southwest of France, fed strictly on foie gras, custom made charcuterie and pork belly from lesser pigs will be marketed each with its own identification number and tag with a picture of the pig farmer’s daughter.
A major rival to the black-footed pigs of southwest France will be the healthier blue-footed pigs raised in Kansas on a diet rich in blueberries, blue potatoes, blue corn chips, bluebell nectar, and other anti-oxidants.
Boutique chocolate will be labeled with the production date and the chocolatier’s license and cell phone numbers. Chocolate tastings will be widely promoted, as well as the usual What to Drink with Chocolate selected by chocoholics.
As restaurant consultant Michel Whitemann notes in his annual roundup of trends, wacky ice creams seem to be unstoppable. I have railed against lawn clippings in ice cream for years and as Wiley Dufresne said when I asked if anyone actually liked his foie gras with anchovy and cocoa nibs: “Gael, no one is listening to you.” I am forced to predict that mustard sorbet will come in many flavors just like mustard. And bravo to you, if you can eat prune Armagnac ice cream with dried thyme.
Cocktails can’t possibly get sweeter but they will. How about a carrot cake daiquiri? And pomegranate flavored vodka on the rocks made of smart water? I’ll take a yuzu martini, hold the kumquats please.
copyright pending 2007 by Gael Greene

Web Site: insatiable Critic

Reader Reviews for "My Predictions for 2008"

Want to review or comment on this article?
Click here to login!

Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!

Reviewed by - - - - - TRASK 12/31/2007
Totally Greed $ Mongers Rule You,Your Very Souls...

This Is Really Funny,i.e. More Than Food Poisoning...

Credit For The Write...


Confessions of a Movie Addict by Betty Jo Tucker

Film Stars! Dancing! Popcorn! At last, a life story with everything but the movie stuff edited out.This amusing memoir chronicles film critic Betty Jo Tucker's love affai..  
Featured BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members

Thrilling Days of Yesteryear: The Golden Age of Radio by John Rayburn

From the primitive days of crystal set radios to advent of television and digital technology...  
Featured BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.