NATIONAL UN-HUMP DAY

© - March 29, 2008 - Tom Hyland


ED - Terrific picture, and sentiments …

I MISSED IT ... was fast asleep, with 2 little teensy-weensy nite-lites aglow in a 45' trailer! But was there in Spirit.

Can't help but wonder - what would a simple ONE DAY BOYCOTT ON DRIVING ACHIEVE? I would recommend it be in the Middle of the week, on a WEDNESDAY, and call it NATIONAL UN-HUMP DAY!

Imagine if EVERYONE EVERYWHERE ALL CALLED OUT SICK and didn't DRIVE - to work, from work, to the store, from the store, to the bar, from the bar, to the mall, from the mall, to the school, from the school, to the college, from the college, to the GAS PUMP, from the GAS PUMP, and on, and on, and on ...

Of course there would be Emergency Personnel necessary, like; medical, fire, police - but, just imagine the impact - NO RUSH HOUR TRAFFIC - ANYWHERE - AND TWICE! The Traffic Reporters would be Paranoid - NOTHING to report! NO ACCIDENTS! NO DELAYS! NO JAMS! ZILCH! NUTTIN' HONEY!

Well, IF they all cooperated - there would be NO NEWS REPORTS, NO WEATHER REPORTS, NO SPORTS REPORTS - NO 'FILM AT ELEVEN" - or Ten, or Six, or Five, or Four, or Three, or Two, or even ONE! NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS, RIGHT?

Maybe it would be like the old movie, "The Day The Earth Stood Still' starring Michael Rennie, in 1951.

NO SALES - NOT AT GAS PUMPS! NOT AT ANY MALLS, STORES - NO WHERE! NONE! NADA!

Perhaps complete Families might actually spend ONE DAY UNITED - sitting down and eating meals TOGETHER! - maybe even saying GRACE? TOGETHER! - doing household chores TOGETHER! Actually playing TOGETHER? Actually Listening to one another? TOGETHER!

BUT - ALAS and ALACK! The entire Retail Industry would be bitching and moaning because they LOST MONEY FOR ONE DAY! But, do not dismay, they would recover by having a new, Special Sale Day - THE DAY AFTER UN-HUMP DAY SALE!

Then we could all get back to Normalcy - you know, like:

AVARICE - GREED - RUSHING - WASTE - CORRUPTION - LYING -

DOG-EAT-DOG! ME - ME - ME!