Join Free! | Login    
USA Independence Day
   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!


Featured Authors:  Gwendolyn Thomas Gath, iIolanthe Woulff, iG. Rynk, iChrisTopher Stone, iByron Edgington, iLloyd Lofthouse, iJudith Mays, i

  Home > Humor > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Victoria's Poetry & Voices of Muse

· + Follow Me
· Contact Me
· Success story
· Articles
· Poetry
· News
· Stories
· Blog
· 1,062 Titles
· 7,892 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
Member Since: Sep, 2007

Victoria's Poetry & Voices of Muse, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.

Featured Book
The Prisoner's Dilemma
by Mel Hathorn

Ordinary Americans take on a powerful corporation and change everything...  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members

Ultimate Sexy
by Victoria's Poetry & Voices of Muse   
Rated "PG" by the Author.
Last edited: Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Posted: Sunday, December 05, 2010

  Print   Save    Follow    Share 

Recent articles by
Victoria's Poetry & Voices of Muse

Black Jewels
You My Sweetest Wild Flower
Authoress|Poetess: One Last Quill for the Feral Plighted Rue
Inner Stillness
Gentle Croon
A Purpose Driven Life
...this is for you love
           >> View all

Sexy Like Nobody's Business!!!
as Bobby Flay would say:
Time To Throw Down...
does he say that even?


Ultimate Sexy

I thought of ways to invite you
inside these feelings I have 
where I bounce high 
on the trampoline of enthusiasm 
just thinking about you, 
and I sometimes tumble downward 
when I slip on these feelings I have 
when I try to walk on icy stairs
without my snow shoes
because I want to look sexy to you
or when I am not paying attention to where I am going
and I slam into closed doors or those brick walls 
because I was trying to be cool, calm 
and collected around you 
when I thought you would be looking at me…

But then as I fell on my ass every time 
and began thinking I really blew it this time
after I twisted my ankle and shot you my thong moon
when I was trying to walk in those red leather stilettos 
like a super model in a mini skirt with a super push up bra
(even though those stripper shoes hurt my toes)
I was making believe I could throw down some ultimate sexy 
like the very best seductress on earth
and you tried to hide how amusing it all was 
as I seen you spew your coffee
all over the place…

© Poetess Victoria L. McColley 2010








Web Site: Poetry Writers Book Shop

Reader Reviews for "Ultimate Sexy"

Want to review or comment on this article?
Click here to login!

Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!

Reviewed by Douglas Bentley
An "A" for trying to seduce
An "A+" for sharing the humor of "Ultimate Sexy"

Reviewed by Amber Moonstone
Hell yes, Sexy isn't the word for this humorous look at a babe doing what she can to be Ultimately sexy...Love the guitar playing, now that's sexy to me..Just play me with your guitar, baby!!

Peace, love and light,
Reviewed by stan nassano
pretty cool way ya did this ...nice write and a t least the coffee was not shooting out his nose,i admit I do find it hard to think of man doing that in your presence but ...we all have our
uncool moments,not always alone ,but out there for some to see, as shown by your poem, nicely done
Reviewed by TONY NERONE
You know something Dear One, Everything or anything you write is complete passion. That guy sounds me when I was younger. Great prose, Vickie.

Namaste with Love
Reviewed by Gene Williamson
Ultimate is definitely the right word, Victoria.
This is beautiful. You too. -gene.
Reviewed by Chessly Nesci
Vickie, Love the sexy blues! This poem is sexy because those things really happen. They have for me! I loose my speech when someone sweeps me off my feet. I trip, say the wrong thing and turn red. If the coffee was spilled then you were noticed. Sexy, Sexy!! ~Chessly
Reviewed by Felix Perry
Vic...this is so funny but sooo real. I love it. The funny part is we all do it, men suck in their guts, wear shirts that they think show off non existant muscles, try to lift things a tow truck couldn't raise etc. So yes I could sympathize and emptathize with this one all too well. Just think how hard it is to look sexy in a Santa suit and a long white beard. LMAO
Reviewed by John Flanagan
shoot me that thong moon any day, Vickie! gotta luv this, you're at your funny fiery best here...
yes, yes, yes!

Reviewed by Peter Schlosser (Reader)
love the music and the prose. check out a band called the black keys on you tube. dynamite cool they are, as was this poem. take care seductress! padded rooms, they always help me............
Reviewed by Mary Lacey, Desertrat

This was so funny! But if it happened, it most have been SO embarassing! Thanks for the laugh.

Reviewed by Regis Auffray
I appreciate this perspective, Vickie; than you for sharing the humor and the meaning as well. Love, hugs, and best wishes,

xo Regis
Reviewed by Christine Tsen
This is hilarious!!! Thank you Vickie, an absolute pleasure!!!
Reviewed by Reginald Johnson
Confusing to my small corner of the world ... but ultimately intriguing.
Reviewed by David cox
you are the ultimate sexy vickie without a doubt. no contest you are the number one.

Popular Humor Articles
  1. Like Grandma, Like Grandson and dealing wi
  2. Frog Heaven
  3. The 2000 Year Old Man
  4. Lost C. Burnett Skit
  5. Merry Atheistmas
  6. A Penny For My Thoughts?
  7. Conniving My Retirement
  8. We Do Wait
  9. 2014 and 2015
  10. Truth or Bull-Poop

Jeremy and the Summer of Stalking by Mark Sutton

'Jeremy and the Summer of Stalking' is a strange, humorous tale about Jeremy Felliwell, a sociopath, loner, pervert, stalker and poet. Jeremy's already chaotic existence deteriora..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Don't Ask and I Won't Have to Lie by Beverly Mahone

We know LYING is wrong BUT—lying happens sometimes when it comes to what we will or will not reveal to other people—-or our own denial about who we really are…… ..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.