Is this thought outdated? A man who is attracted to you will want to sleep with you. However if you really want that man and would like to build a relationship it is absolutely essential that you do not sleep with him in the early stages.
So, do you have sex right away, or wait a few dates. This truly depends on you, not someone else’s philosophy. What you desire and what you’re looking for. Everyone has sex for different reasons the main reason is because you REALLY want to. I can see some of you being concerned with how they will think of you the next morning, well, turn it around, how will you think of them the morning after, while sipping coffee? Sex is a natural expression between 2 people, an exchange of energies to be relished and enjoyed. Bottom line, it’s a choice...you have the choice. If someone so urgently wants your body RIGHT NOW, (but you don’t want to) can they not wait till the next time to see you? Do what is comfortable for your own well being not someone else’s.
Sleeping on the 1st date is about chemistry, lust and hormones. And if nothing happens afterwards, then it wasn’t meant to be. If a man judges you based solely on that and not the great night you had prior to having sex, then you’ve just had sex with an insecure man. Don’t dwell on it, move on.
Don’t think you did something wrong, or regret it. Don’t waste your energies or give power to a man and a situation that is over and done with.
After having sex with the same man (without condoms) for years, they are a new reality for you. Here is a thought I want you to remember in the heat of the moment, if a man refuses to wear a condom because “it doesn’t feel natural” he’s essentially saying he has no respect for you and his desires take precedence over your concerns about disease. In effect, he’s saying “trust me” I don’t think so! There are so many STD’s out there and it takes just one time and you have a “gift” a “reminder” of that man forever.
Sex is the coming together of 2 adults who desire the same thing. Sex! Exquisite ecstasy and lovemaking does not occur the first time 2 people have sex. This is something that is developed over time, while you’re getting to know each other’s pleasure points, likes/dislikes and desires. Don’t confuse the two and get yourself riled up about something that is basically a natural, physical instinct when attraction is there.
It’s your body, your choice, live by what you believe and enjoy the moment for what it is.
Terri Giosia
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