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Leslie Musoko

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Member Since: Mar, 2010

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Blogs by Leslie Musoko

A Writers Labyrinth: Drifting
4/11/2010 2:27:48 PM    [ Flag as Inappropriate ]

There are no answers.Where is my soul? Where are my visions, where is the strength that guided me to this place? I have fallen and continue to drift like the rivers of the earth.
Shadows and more shadows, ghost from the past that haunt me day and night. Like a forgotten fountain in a valley beyond redemption I have again been abandoned and left for dead. There are no answers. My ways are tried, tested and fail before my eyes because they do not meet any rules. My conscience is disturbed by my lusts and the cries from my heart, yet am I overshadowed by my hope that it is only another day, another bad day that could change with faith and hope. Words, oh words! How have I hated you in my cell! I have known plenty, said many yet failed to make any impact when I needed them most! Where is my soul? Where are my visions, where is the strength that guided me to this place? I have fallen and continue to drift like the rivers of the earth. There are rats in my kitchen, breadcrumbs strewn on my carpet. I am covered in dust, seaweed from the fruits of my hopelessness. Time moves like a gorge, disowning everything in its path. Cry I say, cry I wish, yet there are no tears from me. I am all cried out, all dried up. Remember the old days I say. Remember Rome, the richness of the sun, the music in the hall ways and the treasures that surrounded your soul. Remember good times, remember when all meant so much and yet was so little. Does any of it mean anything now? Why should it as I have fallen step by step into a well of sin. I have been coaxed by my own wisdom, guided by the misfortune of a wisdom blinded by other wisdom. The land is barren, and I hesitate at all doorways, unable to knock, so many reasons why not to do so and many few ones for doing so. Which side of the coin do I fall on? If the past was anything to go by then I would recollect that I had failed so many more times before yet had I been chosen to walk on the path that today brings me to this place. It was not by choice, it was what happened. So why the questions, why the lack of energy, why the emptiness? Friends, that say much but do little, are these people real? I hear their voices but see the shadows and weakness in their hearts. Should I call it darkness? If I did, would I be judged on grounds that I am not nice? How can one see darkness and call it light? How can one see ignorance and call it warmth? What have we become where the words we use are not reflections of our thoughts? Everything is in boxes, separated by rationales. Each trend of thought has to be processed like the machines that have been made to kill our imaginations. We have succumbed to rules in society that are made for computers and for the law. But what law is it that offers no comfort to a man when he sees darkness in the soul of another?
What a waste. I take out my weakness on others and blame them for my own incompetence because I cannot find my spirit and the voice that guided me to this place. Even this self judgment proves nothing!! I rebel against all laws and oppose each passage as none holds the answers of the voice that guided me to where I have come to be. Oh! How I wish my cries could be heard, how I wish my cries could be recognized. Those where the times, the days when the importance of being me meant that whatever I did meant something to me! Did I do any of it myself or is it still the blindness in me talking.
Concentrate I say, concentrate and find your purpose. There is something you are not seeing. Yet am I drifting, unable to make sense of it all but continue on my path stricken of everything except hope in the Lord. If I make it through today it would be a miracle.

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More Blogs by Leslie Musoko
• Loose End - Tuesday, August 13, 2013
• Stranger things have happened... - Tuesday, June 07, 2011
• Get in line sinner I was here first! - Saturday, June 04, 2011
• Word for word... - Sunday, May 29, 2011
• Ring Leader - Friday, May 20, 2011
• Friend or Foe.. - Monday, May 16, 2011
• Indelible Vision... - Thursday, May 05, 2011
• Take me back... - Friday, April 22, 2011
• Temporal Enemy - Monday, April 18, 2011
• Epistolary to the future - Wednesday, April 06, 2011
• Basket Case... - Saturday, March 26, 2011
• This child of mine is my favorite... - Wednesday, March 16, 2011
• High Wycombe... - Thursday, March 03, 2011
• When people talk... - Tuesday, February 22, 2011
• God's time is the best... - Friday, February 18, 2011
• Am I my brother's keeper? - Wednesday, February 09, 2011
• Look but don't touch! - Friday, January 21, 2011
• Best of three... - Wednesday, January 12, 2011
• Endangered Species... - Saturday, January 08, 2011
• Lost and found... - Tuesday, December 21, 2010
• Alpha Omega Sword... - Friday, December 17, 2010
• Spreading wings.... - Monday, December 06, 2010
• Faces... - Friday, December 03, 2010
• My french connection... - Tuesday, November 30, 2010
• A cross to bear... - Monday, November 22, 2010
• The hand that rocks the cradle... - Monday, November 15, 2010
• You may have problems but seriously mine are worse... - Sunday, November 07, 2010
• Life in the valley of bones... - Wednesday, November 03, 2010
• In sickness and in health till death do us part... - Friday, October 29, 2010
• I heard you were coming... - Sunday, October 24, 2010
• True yoke fellow... - Friday, October 22, 2010
• Benchmark... - Wednesday, October 20, 2010
• Pins and needles... - Sunday, October 17, 2010
• We run in different circles... - Monday, October 11, 2010
• Let bygones be bygones... - Friday, October 08, 2010
• A walk to victory... - Tuesday, October 05, 2010
• Black Book - Saturday, October 02, 2010
• There are two sides to this story... - Wednesday, September 29, 2010
• Tall, Dark and Ugly... - Saturday, September 25, 2010
• Law and behold... - Monday, September 20, 2010
• Eden's Charm... - Thursday, September 16, 2010
• Hard work can only get one so far... - Monday, September 13, 2010
• Dog eat dog... - Friday, September 10, 2010
• Orbit... - Tuesday, September 07, 2010
• Beauty and Bands... - Friday, September 03, 2010
• Eli - Friday, August 27, 2010
• Road Trip... - Tuesday, August 24, 2010
• Last Words... - Friday, August 20, 2010
• Places we return to time and again... - Tuesday, August 17, 2010
• Before Flashes... - Monday, August 16, 2010
• Stalking Caesar... - Friday, August 13, 2010
• Transcendence... - Wednesday, August 11, 2010
• Creature of habit... - Friday, August 06, 2010
• Bestowed... - Sunday, August 01, 2010
• Hot Pants! - Monday, July 26, 2010
• Behind the Scenes: Harlem Book Festival - Sunday, July 18, 2010
• Kissing Despair.... - Thursday, July 15, 2010
• Weekend Fever! Perhaps I caught something... - Monday, July 05, 2010
• The depth saith... - Saturday, July 03, 2010
• Divers Weights... - Monday, June 28, 2010
• Rebel in disguise... - Friday, June 25, 2010
• Magic Moments... - Wednesday, June 23, 2010
• Nocturnal to Diurnal... - Friday, June 18, 2010
• Ali Baba and the forty thieves - Wednesday, June 09, 2010
• A Poetry of Psalms - Friday, June 04, 2010
• Divinity Dawns - Friday, May 28, 2010
• One Mississippi, two Mississippi...cross - Tuesday, May 18, 2010
• War of the Roses Part II - Saturday, May 08, 2010
• War of the Roses Part I - Saturday, May 08, 2010
• Men behaving badly: Step into my shoes - Friday, April 30, 2010
• My Sidewinder: D-Day of Evil - Monday, April 26, 2010
• Tongue tied and breathing: The choir boy - Sunday, April 18, 2010
• Grey Matter: Putting Science into Art - Saturday, April 17, 2010
•  A Writers Labyrinth: Drifting - Sunday, April 11, 2010  

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