Blogs by Betty Anne Grillo
Do men and women handle #bankruptcy differently?
6/27/2012 12:03:19 PM
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Today is the women's turn!
Of course—they are from different planets!
Serious financial problems are devastating to everyone. I never met a person in my career as a paralegal happy to face the problems that come along with the territory. Yesterday, I discussed my observations about the ways men deal with difficult financial situations—including bankruptcy. Today I’ll talk about those I relate to even better—women… because I am one.
There are many women facing serious budget problems in today’s world, whether or not they are part of a couple. People with high-paying jobs, women with children at home, retirees living on fixed incomes: all of these individuals have been hurt by the present economic market.
I noticed when working through these difficulties with women that they very often felt ashamed, personally responsible and quite hopeless. Sometimes they took care of the family budget because their partner didn’t want any part of it, but there just wasn’t enough money coming in to pay the bills on time, or at all. Women often absorb the negativity around them, and then accept full responsibility for duties that should have been handled together with their spouses or partners. Women may also find it difficult to face the reality of the situation, knowing that they might be blamed or ridiculed once the truth is known.
The most important decision a woman can make is to find the right circumstance to share the details about her financial situation with a professional. Fortunately, a woman is more likely to consult professionals than her male counterpart—in much the same way as asking for directions when lost comes because it is natural to her. When she finds that help, the tears begin to flow, the self-imposed guilt surfaces, and it is then possible to take steps toward financial health.
In addition, a professional might also be more comfortable portraying the realities of the situation to the woman’s spouse. As a third party, the emotionality is removed from the situation and it can be faced head-on and realistically. It is hard to play the blame game when you’re in the office of an attorney or paralegal.
I always worked hard to create an environment for women where they felt safe and secure in their decisions. Along with this came the opportunity to allow her to vent, cry, and recover. Then we were ready to do the real work.
It was always a pleasure to see spouses work together toward the common goal. Sadly, it was rare to be involved with couples that didn’t find the need to blame one partner or the other, but that could be attributed to human nature.
For those women living on their own, many are already used to doing without the latest purse, fancy car, and expensive jewelry. I am amazed at how frugally a woman can live, and how dedicated she becomes to the goal of financial freedom. Women have always taught me something in the process.
If you are a woman facing a serious financial crisis, turn to a valuable, affordable resource: BANKRUPTCY FROM A TO Z: THE PATH TO FINANCIAL HOPE AND FREEDOM. You can find it on my website: www.sunsetdreambooks.com and at www.amazon.com. Let me work along with you to achieve your goals. We can do this together!
All my best!
SUNSET DREAM BOOKS
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