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Robert A. Mills

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Blogs by Robert A. Mills

(Close Counts) 0NLY IN HORSESHOES 7.7.09
7/6/2009 8:33:50 AM    [ Flag as Spam or Inappropriate ]


Although it is yet to be written and titled, “Only in Horseshoes” by Sarah Palin will do for the publishing world in the 21st century what “Gone With the Wind” did for the same industry in 1936. Too bad Ms. Palin does not have the perspicacity or permission to use Margaret Mitchell’s title. But don’t confuse foresight with chutzpa.

It won’t matter. If only half of the people who would have voted for John McCain but resisted because of Ms. Palin purchase her book, it will justify the 6-figure advance she will undoubtedly be offered.

But it can’t stop there. I foresee a television quiz show hosted by the former governor—“You Betcha Your Life”—that Fox will pay her millions for a 26-week commitment. Reality shows a la “Survivor” and “The Amazing Race” ironically would be apropos as well.

True, she is not an actress (or is she?) who can sing and dance, but with proper coaching and directing, let’s consider a Broadway revival of “Charlie’s Aunt,” “Gypsy,” “The Sound of Music,” “West Side Story,” or “My Fair Lady” (set in Juneau.)

Movies? Why not? She’s certainly as photogenic as Jamie Lee Curtis or Julia Roberts, and with computer-generation we can get away with anything. As a movie star, she will command 20 to 25 million per flick. Perhaps the Mitchell estate could be persuaded to re-make GWTW with Palin as Scarlett O’Hara, Brad Pitt as Rhett Butler, and Clint Eastwood as Ashley Wilkes.

As Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin’s income, at best, is (was) give or take a hundred twenty-five grand annually. As a private citizen, she can now command a hundred million simply by, as Woody Allen would say, showing up.

There are some pundits, however, who claim the whole ploy is to pave the way for a White House bid in 2012. Get real. It’s a lousy job that pays a mere four hundred thousand (yeah, I know, there are tons of perks, most of which can be had by shrewd politicians without ever having to get gray and wrinkled.) Of course, presidents (even bad ones) get written up in history books and encyclopedias (which no one ever reads.)

No, Ms. Palin is not, nor do I suspect she wants to be, the Great White Hope of the Republican Party. No question they are desperate—if all you had going for you was John Boehner, Mitt Romney, and Newt Gringrich, how desperate would you be?—but that is not the about-to-be-former governor’s concern.

What the pretty woman from Alaska wants is to write (and make money) like J.K. Rowling, act (and make money) like Meryl Streep, host TV (and make money) like Regis Philbin, and join the likes of Warren Buffet, Bill Gates, and Carlos Slim Helŭ on Forbes golden lists.

She can do none of this as an ill-prepared politician riding into town on the dimming illumination of a national spotlight that turns out to be battery powered—and not even by Energizers or Duracells. She can, however, with proper guidance by the Super Pros of show business, become the second most mature, powerful woman in the world.

Aside from Sally Field.

Go get ‘em, Sarah. You may not be the next American Idol in any field, but with careful handling, it’s worth a shot.



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