The Path I Once Took
by Cadi Rebekah Nobles
Saturday, January 31, 2004
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Finding the path of true freedom.
The path outside looked dim and drear,
I wondered for a moment could God be near?
It's me whose wondered far from home,
The path outside looked so alone.
In my hurry to just get away,
I found that I have somehow strayed.
I had an idea of where I wanted to go,
But how to get there, I did not know.
I heard the best thing was to take off and fly,
Don't know what you can do until you try.
So, one day I left, just in my mind
"Old paths" I learned, I left them behind.
My body stayed, but my spirit changed,
My thoughts and my plans I rearranged.
In the part of the being that no one sees,
I changed a special part of me.
I changed the part that cared more for my fellow man,
Being that charitable didn't fit into my plan.
I changed the desire to always seek right,
Worrying about that had made me "uptight."
I changed my wanting to always be good,
I figured that caused more worry than it should.
So, slowly but surely the changes took place,
Though it was hard to discern in my everyday face.
To most around me, I appeared much the same,
But there were a few that could see the change.
I avoided their questions and tried to appear,
Much the same person they had known through the years.
But when you change your heart, you can't hide it for long,
The person you've become, becomes too strong.
So, in my mind, at a time I can't place,
I started on this path and picked up the pace.
I debated my decision as I past the first station,
The journey seemed more important than the destination.
Onward I went, in a direction unknown,
It seemed kind of lonely, but still I went on.
I was so determined to lead and not follow,
The feeling inside me was hard to swallow.
There came a point where I saw I was wrong,
But the trail behind me seemed so long.
I wanted to return to a place I could name,
But the decisions I had made brought their own shame.
The adventure that began with excitement and pride,
Turned into a nightmare and I wanted to hide.
My family and friends would see my mistake,
I had to face the consequences for the path that I take.
Then it reached a point where fear took hold,
I didn't even know if I could get back to the fold.
Suddenly pride and self didn't matter at all,
I cried out to God, "Please hear my call.
Jesus have mercy, for my sin and neglect,
Please don't give up on your little girl yet."
For the scariest moment I listened in fear,
Not knowing whether Jesus would have followed me here.
He said he'd never leave me, but I had left him.
Was there redemption for such a great sin?
For the briefest of moment's silence met my pleas,
Then I heard a voice that was pure comfort to me.
"I told you not to stray and leave my protection."
Oh, the wisdom I could see now in reflection!
He scolded me soundly for the changes I made,
But it was pure delight just to be saved.
In my heart took place changes as I took his hand,
I felt like a grateful, little lost lamb.
The path brightened and the way was made clear,
I could see Jesus had always been near.
The peace that you hear about time and again,
Took place in my heart as I yielded my sin.
I didn't want independence, didn't want to be "free,"
I only wanted his protection comforting me.
I'm back on the path that he bids me walk,
I'm talking the talk he wants me to talk.
Trying to put others ahead of myself,
Keep selfish motivations up on the shelf.
Keep my eyes on the prize, behind I won't look,
Don't want to remember the path I once took.
Sharing His Treasures