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andrea peters

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Member Since: Mar, 2004

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A taste of death
by andrea peters

Tuesday, July 05, 2005
Rated "PG13" by the Author.
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           >> View all 10

Depression

I feel a lump in my throat.
No.
It is much deeper and much more intense.

There is a blackness in my soul.
It is a consuming emptiness eating away at the edges of my being
Pulling what I once believed was my very core
Into fragments,
Making shadowy pieces out of a person that I once knew.
Me.

Now only a remnant
Of a man,
That once was considered good…even great by some
Who by their own admissions, may have had a jaded eye
Yet still…by some. A good man.

There is a darkness within my heart.
A vessel which has sailed into a vast unknown sea.
Uncharted and unrelinquishing in its grasp
Pulling in one direction
Away from the familiar to some foreign destination

Pulled inexorably by forces which are driven
By a numbness which consumes…smiles…and laugther…and happiness.
Which consumes life.

How can I explain what this feels like?
When the passion for life ebbs like a tide forever going out
Chased away by the power of some object – that hangs distant and unattached.
As I stare at pictures flashing upon a screen or through images passing in my mind of
Memories.

Memories that once meant so much,
But now hold so little.

I feel a lump in my throat.
I do not know what it is
But it has an acrid taste,
A bitterness,
A vileness,
Yet it calls to me to imbibe in its flavor
Like a bittersweet candy.

It whispers to me to sample its rare elixir,

A mix of darkness, without the knowledge of light.
An emptiness, without the enlightenment of fullness
A cloak hanging upon no shoulders.

A taste of Death.


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Reviewed by Paul Judges 12/16/2009
Very powerful, Andrea.
Reviewed by John Domino 4/6/2009
"Trust in the Lord with all you heart
and lean not to your own understanding.
In all ways, acknowledge Him and
He will direct your paths." Prov. 3:5-6
Reviewed by Lois Christensen 6/6/2008
Depression is pulling at you and taking you down. Not a nice thing to go through but can be tackled with positive thoughts and some counseling from others. It is sometimes like death has taken over your body and you need to readjust to real life again. It sometimes takes much time and depression can never disappear altogher. I fight it each day. A stuggle it can be too.
Reviewed by Sheila Roy 4/8/2008
This is a powerful piece. I love the original descriptions. Gripping work~
Sheila
Reviewed by Peter Adotey Addo 10/1/2006
A wonderful choice of words and very skillfully used to evoke the emotions you wrote about ... You are good ..Thank you I liked your poem ..Peter Addo
Reviewed by Jacqueline Marshall 9/18/2006
I've been there and you did a good job of explaining what it feels like. The image of "A cloak hanging upon no shoulders" is masterful.
Reviewed by jude forese 7/8/2005
powerfully and skillfully penned ...
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 7/6/2005
Andrea,

You've captured the very essence of depression. Realistically. Honestly. POWERFULLY!

I've been there...(((HUGS)))

love, Karla. :(
Reviewed by Joyce Hale 7/6/2005
Excellent write, Andrea!

Peace.
Reviewed by Kate Clifford 7/5/2005
The expression of emotion in this write is fantastic and touches the core of depression; a state of death, without death. As dark as this emotion appears it is often the breakthrough of a new light :-)
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