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Lazette M. Gifford

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The Angst of Hero Naming
by Lazette M. Gifford
Saturday, May 19, 2001

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Recent poems by Lazette M. Gifford
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(A poem on the great 'fun' writers have finding a name for their characters.)

The Angst of Hero Naming

The tale of a hero beyond compare,
With flashing eyes and perfect hair.
Flawless words flowed from my head --
Until I reached that first damned said.

Now the true strife begins at last
As floundering in a sea of names, I'm cast.
Rosebud and Cloud are far too cute,
And he's no Bob, beyond dispute
Corwin? Hilton? Lane or Bard?
Naming a kid couldn't be half this hard!
A couple dozen names go by,
(My hero gives me the evil eye)
I search the shelves for baby name books
(Kept hidden to avoid occasional odd looks)
With frantic haste I start paging through,
No, no --Androcles will never do!
No Mac or Mark or Michael here
Such names are too plain, I fear.
Nicholas has a nice sound it's true --
But I've used it in a book or two.
So to stranger, archaic lists I turn
No he's absolutely not a Vern!
Trying to keep plot lines in my head -
Would what's-her-name take a Loki to bed?

Hours of writing time frittered away
That can't be the dawn of a new day!
I sit and curse that first damned said --
Oh the hell with it! I'll call him Fred.

Lazette.Net
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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 5/4/2006
Nicely rhymed with good rhythm and humor as well; thank you for sharing this gift, Lazette. Love and peace to you,

Regis
Reviewed by Bonnie Mercure (Reader) 8/25/2001
Really a cute and funny poem.
I have the same problem
naming characters.
Reviewed by Josh Jenks 5/19/2001
Fairly humorous, flows nicely when read. I too understand that pain of naming =)
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