Join (Free!) | Login  

     Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
   Services MarketPlace (Free to post!)
Where Authors and Readers come together!


Featured Authors:  Paul Williams, iSteve Coltman, iKevin Weeks, iDoug Boren, iDavid Humphrey Sr, iJay Dubya, iOwen Thomas, i

  Home > Poetry > Poetry
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Linda Dousay

· Become a Fan
· Contact me
· Poetry
· Stories
· 24 Titles
· 82 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
Member Since: Mar, 2006

Linda Dousay, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.

Popular Poetry (Poetry)
  1.  imaginable possibility
  2.  A Woman
  3.  Shoes
  4.  I Sprung
  5.  sky of reason
  6.  Speachless
  7.  The Domino Effect
  8.  fusion of muse
  9.  Fifty Bales of Hay....
  10.  The Fighter
  11.  Wind
  12.  Bedlam in Thibodaux
  13.  Disciplined
  14.  My Silence
  15.  Understanding
  16.  Message
  17.  A Few Words About You
  18.  Searches of Mine
  19.  Bars, Taverns, Saloons, etc.
  20.  I'll Be Doing It Until I Die

Working Draft
by Linda Dousay

Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Not rated by the Author.
Share   Print  Save   Become a Fan

Recent poems by Linda Dousay
•  The Wonder of it All
•  Paved with Diamonds
•  Papa's New Baby
•  I Have a Dream
•  Southern Comfort
           >> View all 22

This is part of a poem... I am having problems with one stanza...your feedback is appreciated...My feeling is that the second stanza has too much in it...

First draft:

Deep within the valley
a glint of light revealed
a gentle flowing river
near a field of daffodils... 

(Decided to stay with the first version)



Want to review or comment on this poem?
Click here to login!

Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!

Reviewed by La Belle Rouge Poetess Of The Heart 3/2/2007
I like the first better, more concise but conveys the image well.
Reviewed by K. Mulroney 3/1/2007
Read perfect to me. The beat is right on target. Don't mess with perfecton!
Reviewed by Laura Mayer 2/27/2007
I agree with Fee, I like the flow and rhythm of the first stanza. Hope this helps.
Hugs, Laura
Reviewed by Felix Perry 2/27/2007
I like both versions but the first would be my preference, it has a nicer flow and rythem to it when read out loud.

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.