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Ed Matlack

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Advice to those with the Munchies
by Ed Matlack

Sunday, September 12, 2004
Rated "G" by the Author.
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HIGH humor...

Advice to those with the Munchies


 


If you do get high,


Eventually within a short time you will sigh,


Stating how hungry you get, I do not lie,


So I bring you the best way to make popcorn,


I hope it brings a smile to your eye…


 


Negotiating that first standup: just do it,


If you fall back down take another hit,


And don’t be trying again that shit…!


 


Once on your feet,


Sway on over to the fridge for a treat,


Lets see salt or sweet, either way I get both ain’t that neat?


 


Oh for the rush going right to your head,


Standing up can bring a desire for bed,


But must eat right now, the munchies have me done led,


To the refrigerator door, got to my stomach be fed…


 


When micro waving, be sure to remove what is in the micro wave first,


Do not try to put your popcorn in and burn up what you store,


Especially if you use the micro wave to store your stash,


If you do that, you will be throwing it away eventually in the trash…


 


Be sure to have your toppings ready and waiting,


Melted cheese, hot butter, salt, garlic pepper, my mouth salivating,


Don’t sit down while waiting; you will never again get up,


Don’t think that you can get someone else to make it for you,


As no one knows how you do like it, no not even my pup…


 


Make sure you also have something to drink,


Milk, or soda or iced tea or water,


Whatever it is make sure it is cold and don’t even share it with your daughter…


 


Just an explanation herein for how to prepare your munchies,


In the eventuality that you may get high and need to know this,


Oh yes and be sure to, while up go take a piss,


For once you are back sitting, with food in hand,


Little you will want to get up and for long stand…


Excuse me I am only trying to help,


Don’t be throwing a tantrum, or take a fit and hiss…               


© ed ~ 9/12/04


 


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Reviewed by Danielle Mundy 9/12/2004
I don't know, Ed, I always made sure my munchies were on hand so as not to go downstairs and alert the parents as to what I was up to ;) Brings back memories...*sigh*
Danielle
Reviewed by Katy Walsvik 9/12/2004
Ahhhhhhh... the horrid, fat-filled, heavily (fake) buttered movie popcorn and a blue Gatorade can get me to my feet in a flash! Wheeeeeee... it's my great, dietary downfall, that and crisp chicken skin.. Sigh. I may not get high with you, Eddie M,(been there, done that hehe) but I know all about 'sitting back down' and becoming ensconced. (grin) Add a video and I'm THERE! What time? katy xox.
Reviewed by Evelyn Simon 9/12/2004
LOL, you said it all, Ed. :)
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 9/12/2004
I love Popcorn...."salt & vinegar...yummy!!

Guess what i am eating hot pudding with custard ans ice cream right this moment!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by Phillip William Allen 9/12/2004
Take 50 deep breaths and hold breath for 30 secs. Cures it LOL. Those were the days
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