AuthorsDen.com   Join (Free!) | Login  

     Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
   Services MarketPlace (Free to post!)
Where Authors and Readers come together!

SIGNED BOOKS    AUTHORS    eBOOKS new!     BOOKS    STORIES    ARTICLES    POETRY    BLOGS    NEWS    EVENTS    VIDEOS    GOLD    SUCCESS    TESTIMONIALS

Featured Authors:  CULLEN DORN, iPier Tyler, iRichard Rydon, iKaylin kaylin@kaylinmcfarren.com, iJames Milward, iJackie Miller, iBeverly Mahone, i

  Home > Humor > Poetry
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

A PAX

· Become a Fan
· Contact me
· Sponsor Me!
· Success story
· Poetry
· Stories
· Blog
· 624 Titles
· 9,539 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
·
Member Since: May, 2003

   newsletter

Subscribe to the A PAX Newsletter. Enter your name and email below and click "sign me up!"
Name:
Email:
A PAX, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.



Featured Book
The Black Fairy & The Dragonfly
by Paul Day

A little fairy is rejected by her own kind, but finds new friendships and adventure in the dragonfly kingdom...  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members


Featured Book
7 point 7 (On the Richter Scale)
by Miller Caldwell

A book for every Muslim and everyone wishing to know about their way of life. The Diary of the Camp Manager at Mundihar following the South Asian Earthquake - October 200..  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members



Popular Poetry (Humor)
  1.  If I Could Be A Super Hero
  2.  Historic storm a bust...
  3.  For Rent…Christmas Angel for Shoveling Sno
  4.  Finally looks like some significant snow i
  5.  It's All About Timing
  6.  Like His Mother Used To Do
  7.  If women had udders...!
  8.  Somebody Blinked
  9.  Pet Port A Potty
  10.  Halloween is Coming!
  11.  Nite Quill
  12.  I Want a Donut
  13.  Saving paper
  14.  Nuts
  15.  Naughty or Nice...
  16.  I Downloaded A Virus
  17.  The Golden Years...
  18.  I Am the Center of the Universe
  19.  The Land of Sandra Dee -- Anonymous author
  20.  Georgie Porgie





HILLbillie ValenTINE GaL
by A PAX

Monday, February 14, 2005
Rated "G" by the Author.
Share   Print  Save   Become a Fan

Recent poems by A PAX
•  Who???
•  UGGAH IP CAK
•  It shines, by life phase, two
•  As Dreaming Breaks
•  Duplicate Diversities
           >> View all 620


The wonder of me!

I pick my nose, I scratch my butt
I suck my toes, and then I strut
I belch along with favorite songs
And sculpt my ear wax when it is warm


I hold my own when passing gas
Folk can't believe it's from a lass
I braid the hair under my arms
Cuz I be loaded with such charm!!!


I take a bath 3 times a month
Excess is something that I shun
Eat straight from pots and pans each meal
Won't scrub a dish...HEY no big deal!!!


I got this tooth in front I brush
But skip it when I'm in a rush
 

Ah clips mah toenails short n sharp

So I can gut a trout or carp

The men they chase me......heaven knows
Why they insist on courting me with a hose!
If they don't want me as I am
To HELL then... with a picky man!

But hon I loves ya, with my whole heart
And want your loving and ALL yer Parts!
And I will even wash for you
And be your VALENTINE so true !!!!!



Muuuhaahaaa

Yeeehawwww

Happy Valentine's Day

Pax N Play

Lady A
 

 
 

 
 


Want to review or comment on this poem?
Click here to login!


Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!


Reviewed by Randal Files (Reader) 2/18/2005
This is too funny!! Thanks for the laugh.
Reviewed by A Serviceable Villain 2/16/2005
Lady A,

Delightfully humorous poetic write - clever, very clever!!


Best wishes,

Robert
Reviewed by Phillip William Allen 2/16/2005
Now this was funny
Reviewed by jude forese 2/15/2005
very funny ... has a home town feel to it ...
Reviewed by Dale Clark 2/15/2005
LOL funny! and like I always say
Man you gotta perty tooth ;)
Reviewed by Jack Roberts 2/15/2005
WOW!! What a Babe!!!!!!! LOL This is so funny Anita! lol

Jack
Reviewed by Nordette Adams 2/15/2005
Oh, lord, it cracked me up and I needed it. LOL
Reviewed by Sherry Heim 2/14/2005
Delightfully fun write, Anita. Just too cute!
Take care,
Sherry
Reviewed by Sara Coslett 2/14/2005
Anita! This is a hoot! You are so creative, I'm jealous. LOL... Take care ~ Sara
Reviewed by Judy Lloyd (Reader) 2/14/2005
Okay I needed something funny to help out this headache. Nice write.
Reviewed by E T Waldron 2/14/2005
Anita only you could write a classic like this on Valentines day.;-)
and get away with it;-)!lol hahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
etw
Reviewed by Leysa Lowery 2/14/2005
LOL! Too funny!
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 2/14/2005
Lady A,

I can't stop laughing--JAYS what a clever write! All in the name of love--a fantastic write--

(((HUGS))), love and continued prayers, Karla. :)
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 2/14/2005
As long as you wash - for him - things will be just fine, Hillbillie Valentine!

PS What type of ear wax sculptures do you make?!!
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 2/14/2005
hahahahahaha....you are one very nutty Gal!!

Love Tinks
Reviewed by Edwin Larson 2/14/2005
LOL...Ah rekon this un is da funnest balantine ah seen...
Reviewed by Kate Burnside 2/14/2005
... just love the way you cut the crap, Anita, and celebrate the universality of an emotion that is as raw and crude as it is ephemeral and "pure"... along with the people who go with it!! And aint we just a mixture of the whole kaboosh anyway?! Loud and proud. I like basic honesty and "to thy own self be true". Doubtless she will meet a wonderful match that way!! Let your free flag fly, Lady!! As if you would EVER do anything else ;))) LOL Kate xx
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 2/14/2005
this is too cute, anita! thanks for the grins today! well done!

happy valentine's day to you; all i got was a durn cold and sore throat...GRRR!!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your (sick) texas friend, karen lynn. :)
Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader) 2/14/2005
My kida gurl i'm heah to tell yew and thank yew fer puttin' this hear pom out it is abut time us'n hillbillies git sum recok . . reckon . . . sumbody to look at us'n in all our glory!!!
Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us


Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.