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Ed Matlack

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As a matter of fact I do own the whole damn road...
by Ed Matlack
Saturday, February 19, 2005
Rated "G" by the Author.
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           >> View all 5,726

Weird day to drive yesterday spawned this write...

As a matter of fact I do own the whole damn road…!


Hey you, keep out of my way,

If you can’t drive stay out of my state,

Yeah you, go back to Hawaii,

Leave us to drive however we damn well choose…


What part of me waving my hand for you to cross,

Do you not understand?

Am I doing it in the wrong language?

Or would like me to bring next time a brass band…?


No turn signal do you use,

Were they an option on Jap crap cars that year?

Oh geez, don’t let me get you upset,

I wouldn’t want you to cry and for the rest of the day, fret…


It is a federal law to turn on your headlights when your wipers are also on,

I can hardly see you coming from the opposite direction,

Let alone when you are behind me with no lights,

So what if I stop short, if you had your lights on,

I may have seen you back there and tried instead to swerve,

Boy, considering you have no idea where you are going, you’ve got some nerve…

          © ed ~ 2/18/05 

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Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 2/19/2005

Get a HUMMER. That way you will own the road. :) GET OUTTA THE WAY!!!!!!! LOL

a fantastic rant--GRRRRRRRRRR road hogs tick me off, too. :)

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. :)
Reviewed by Judy Lloyd (Reader) 2/19/2005
Well you know I was thinking along these same lines. And like Katy said this is a great rant. Hey what you don't get leave it to me and I will. Right on.
Reviewed by Katy Walsvik 2/19/2005
Stand back... lemme at 'em! OOOOOO, my pet peeve, up there in verse, packed with Eddie M impact and blazing my thoughts, exactly! YES! turn on your damned lights, moron!

Whew! thanks... I needed that, me sweet. It's lovely to be of like mind where these things are concerned. (smile)

What a well-put-together rant... and a bullseye, indeed! katy xox
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 2/19/2005
you ought to come here to texas; they do NOT know how to drive here!! especially in Dallas! YIKES! Dallas Traffic is a NIGHTMARE to end all nightmares! (((:0))) (That's how I look in Dallas rush hour traffic! LOL)

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :)
Reviewed by Michelle Mills 2/19/2005
Where I live (Florida) the cars that invade our roads are 100% American, and usually mini vans piled to the luggage compartment with tourists reeking of coconut oil...and of course all are driving at a whopping 35 mph and IN MY WAY when I'm late for work. Hee hee! Funny write Ed.
Reviewed by Bob Holt (Reader) 2/19/2005
Keep on ranting, Ed. The trouble is, if a few of them get the message, there are still plenty more driving right behind them.

Bob H
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 2/19/2005
Oh boy there are many out there with the same attitude...specialy

those over loaded disco's damn Taxi's!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by Kate Clifford 2/19/2005
Life on the road can be a real hazzard sometimes. Great write.
Reviewed by Nordette Adams 2/19/2005
Yeah, yeah. You Joisey!
Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader) 2/19/2005
I just bought my road.
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 2/19/2005
Funny, I own the whole road, too. Good thing we live in different states - or we'd have to have a showdown!
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