AuthorsDen.com   Join Free! | Login    
   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!

SIGNED BOOKS    AUTHORS    eBOOKS new!     BOOKS    STORIES    ARTICLES    POETRY    BLOGS    NEWS    EVENTS    VIDEOS    GOLD    SUCCESS    TESTIMONIALS

Featured Authors:  John Herlihy, iJ.-F. Bouchard, iDavid Snowdon, iJames Boyle, iKim Glassman, iWendy Laing, iJoe tofuri@swbell.net, i

  Home > Humor > Poetry
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Ed Matlack

· + Follow Me
· Contact Me
· Poetry
· Stories
· Blog
· 5,742 Titles
· 43,623 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
·
Member Since: Aug, 2003

Ed Matlack, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.




Featured Book
No Lawyer Necessary
by Burton Wolfe

How to use a spouse, relative, friend, or colleague as your agent to arrange health care and financial affairs for you, and how to represent you in legal dispute, when yo..  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members


An art form...
by Ed Matlack
Rated "G" by the Author.
Share   Print  Save   Follow
Recent poems by Ed Matlack
•  Obligatory
•  Parental angst...?
•  Patience...
•  Leased...
•  An old hippie lives here...
           >> View all 5,717

Ah self-gratification, might be the best thing since sex, LOL!

An art form…


 


Learned when I was twelve or so,


Not sure the exact way, just that I now know,


Got it down to a science do I now,


Most guys would call it an art form,


If nothing else it gets me quite warm,


And for all the world I really do love to perform…


 


Takes just a few minutes to accomplish,


A little lotion and can be filled a Petri dish,


We try to hide it from parents when kids,


But moms always know when changing sheets,


They always find out, but never say anything about what some do forbid… 


 


Do I need to go to confession?


I really do so with a great deal of discretion,


To some this art form can be called an obsession,


That may be when someone should be seen in the mental health profession…


                © ed ~ 3/15/05

Want to review or comment on this poem?
Click here to login!


Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!


Reviewed by Tinka Boukes
heheheheheheheheheh...say NO more...guess Steve said it all!!

OH BOY!!!!!

Love Tinka ;p
Reviewed by Steve Patterson
hey Yank...
a right Handy poem you wrote here (or r u lefthanded?). anyway, glad these words could cum to u.

watch out tho... you could go blind or crazy. well, you already are crazy ...see what self satisfaction can do to you.
TX
Reviewed by Judy Lloyd (Reader)
Oh my and with five brothers I guess my mother never said a word but this is interesting Ed.
Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Is this a quiz? If so, my answer is coloring my bed sheets in the dark with my crayons while drinking milk. I started doing this when I was 3, and I still do it; Rebecca gets very mad, too.

Did I win a prize or something?!
Popular Poetry (Humor)
  1.  IN WANTS FOR MORE!
  2.  The Thrill is Gone
  3.  My UnWanted Birthday
  4.  OMG, it's freakin' HOT...
  5.  Mushmouth Kostro...
  6.  An old hippie lives here...
  7.  One of Those Days
  8.  Sunny Days and Mondays
  9.  Cell Phove VS My Personal Space...
  10.  Hello, I'm Mister ED...

Grandad Miller, Serial Killer by Mark Sutton

You'll never feel safe on your allotment again.....  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us


Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.