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Ed Matlack

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Accident Avoidance
by Ed Matlack

Saturday, April 02, 2005
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Ed Matlack
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           >> View all 5,606

Hopefully you get to see the picture that will eventually accompany this...

Accident Avoidance…


Can’t keep her mouth shut,

Wish she would just fall on her butt,

The doctor would then curtail her activities, yes cut,

Better to have in the car with me my mutt…


My blood pressure is elevated when she rides along,

She does give my car an element of “no class” when she is singing a song,

Fast am I to slam on the brake when off comes her seatbelt,

Knowing full well that I am doing something that is inherently wrong…


Perhaps someone will invent what this picture shows,

Sometimes I do wish I could fill her up with the gas hose,

Actually I don’t mind her mouth open when on me she does blow,

If she could do that all the time and not talk,

No tickets would my license reflect, no longer would I drive a wreck…

        © ed ~ 4/2/05



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Reviewed by Ronald Hull 4/3/2005
Back seat drivers are at their worst in the front seat.

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader) 4/3/2005
Hey! Sherry has a good idea.
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 4/3/2005
And one must wonder exactly who you are referring to here, Ed - and wondering what she will think about this when she reads it!!

PS Just say it's your female boss who sometimes rides along with you on your deliveries - you might be able to wiggle out of this yet - Good Luck!
Reviewed by jude forese 4/3/2005
but hiw will you get your directions?
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 4/3/2005

Love Tinka
Reviewed by William Bonilla 4/3/2005
know exactly what you mean Ed
they just don't seem to know
when to keep their traps shut
mine is always causing me
to make the wrong turns
then goes .....ooops!
pissing off unmercifully

William ......Peace Brother
Reviewed by J. Allen Wilson 4/2/2005
Ed, good sense tells me that I should avoid this comment like the plague, however, good sense is not always a trait that the male gender wears often...if we did, there would be fewer wars...and fewer reasons to die for macho sake...but I will admit...sometimes talking and driving can be hazardous to ones health.

Reviewed by Sherry Heim 4/2/2005
Ya gotta take the bitter with the sweet, Ed, LOL. Perhaps one day they will clone women from deaf/mutes and then both genders will be happy. Also they will add a cloning patch from a nymphomaniac just to sweeten the pot...ohhh did I really just say that??? Where has all the romance gone?? LOLOLOLOL
Take care,
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