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Ed Matlack

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Longing to Languish in Deaths Clutches...
by Ed Matlack
Sunday, May 08, 2005
Rated "R" by the Author.
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Longing to Languish in Deaths Clutches... 


I know I am in better shape than some,

Hell I can still walk and drive and run,

I am sorry if I am acting like I have already succumb,

But the news I just got has left me most certainly numb…


For now only a few are to know,

Feel free to deny comment on my tale here of woe,

To you all out there I need to thank for what I do owe,

You have helped me to write, to enjoy life, and to grow,

You have helped me to feel at times all-aglow…


I can right now foresee myself in death languishing,

In life I am at the moment, please forgive me, anguishing,

My mind is at present still just a bit cloudy,

A slight haze has overcome my brain; just once more I wish to be rowdy…


I wish, but for Rufuz and Rene, death to come quickly,

I do not wish to become a burden; I do not wish to become sickly,

Suicide may be wrong, my karma suffering ill repair,

But in the face of death I really do wish to soon stare,

He has been there of late, looking over my shoulder,

Causing me great and irreparable despair,

Still I have struggled on, knowing life is sometimes unfair…


What do I do, where do I run, to whom do I turn?

I wish for my love not to know of this,

Till in hell I am ready to burn,

Ah, for death I do ultimately yearn…

            © ed ~ 5/8/05 







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Reviewed by Katy Walsvik 5/11/2005
Stop that, Eddie M! Suicide? 'yearning for death?'... (is this how you keep a secret?) lol.

Sigh... Alright, here's what I want you to do: crawl outta that hole, dust off your huge self (you're 8 feet tall, right? compared to me, anyway), kiss Ruffie, pour some soda, eat a weanie (raw is fine), make sure you aren't out of toilet paper AND that it's coming off the roll the CORRECT way (Ahem), put the toilet seat down, fluff your pillow, chuckle once, guffaw twice and sing allllllll the lyrics to All Along the Watchtower, written by Dylan and sung by the one-and-only Hendrix! Ok... THEN... start planning the decor for your new home.... oh, and don't forget to comb your hair! (and Ruffie's) so you both look lovely when Rene arrives.

This should all take you long enough to stop worrying and get on with your very alive life! Got it? Alrighty, then... (I charge by the hour)! Happy trails to youuuuuu... with love and liniment... me, katy xox
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 5/11/2005

STOP. Right now. STOP.

At the first hint of bad news, it is perfectly normal to be numb and scared and to think the worst. You must not fall into that trap and must FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT it tooth and nail! Do not give in to it. Give it all you got--if treatment isn't sucessful and you die, you will know that you weren't a wimp. I pray for you strength, and know that you are loved by Karen, me, Rufuz and Rene and a whole bunch of AD'ers...(((HUGS)))

love, Karla. :(

Heartwrenching and terrifying read--write me, please, tell me what's going on????
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 5/8/2005
This is a deep heartfelt heart wrenching read Ed!!

Hey buddy KNOW you are loved and what ever the outcome might be you will be in our hearts and prayers forever. And I know you will be just fine...hey you cannot let me frown all day long SMILE okay!!

Geez this poem really pissed in my eyes because GOD knows I am crying and praying right this moment and demanding for God to hold you close right this very moment!!

See ya Buddy!! Emotions a little outacontrol!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by E T Waldron 5/8/2005
Ed, I wish you wouldn't leave us in the dark like this. We can better help if you say what it is. I'm praying that God will cover you with His grace and strength so you may go through whatever it is you must,enduring in the Lord's care. I hope your next poem will be more specific. In the meantime I pray you will be motivated to trust the one who created you for he has your best interest ,even if you don't believe or understand.At least try to give him a chance to show you all are worthy, including you, if they but accept that he is who he says he is. Eileen
Reviewed by Judy Lloyd (Reader) 5/8/2005
I do pray that whatever this is Ed that you will be seen through. But remember you have friends here and I am living proof that things are not always as they seem. I believe that Rufus is sufficient reason for you to know how much you are loved. God made dogs and they do not love or even like trash. Just remember that.
Reviewed by Henry Stevens 5/8/2005
Ed, this is a surprise. But I know my father felt the same and often lay on the bed and prayed for God to take him. One day he died instantly. Your request is real, and I hear you, but I am at a loss for words. Henry p.s. you're still an expert at rhyme, well done poem.

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