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Ian R Thorpe

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Books
· Age Of Certainty

· Age Of Certainty

· Blöd Ties

· The Best Of Boggart Blog (vol 1)

· Dimensions of Mystery

· A Two Faced Poet

· Millennium Dawn (anthology)

· A Stroke of Luck


Short Stories
· Bloodaxe Corner

· The Kiss

· Psycho Benefit Fraud

· The Vegetarian Shoemaker Of Barking

· Garry Trotter and the Portal of Pleasure #7

· Garry Trotter and the Portal of Pleasure #3 (Adult Humour)

· The King of the Ribble Delta Blues Singers (humour)

· A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 19

· A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 18

· A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 17


Articles
· Freedom Of Speech And Information - Why It Is So Important

· The Science Fraud: Many Scientific Research Papers Are Pure Gobbledegook

· Maybe You Should Think About Getting a Tinfoil Hat After all

· Merry Atheistmas

· High Brasil: Fairy Tale Or Atlantis

· Captive Minds And Intellectual Cowardice

· Is The Universe Helping Us Think

· Deliberately Wrecking Our Environment

· Why War Is Inevitable

· Helping The Mind Cope With Stress


Poetry
· We Made Love

· The Hands Of Old People

· Time Travellers

· The Pompous Toad

· Bye Bye Blackbird (parody)

· Sleepless Nights Of A Little boy

· Fitness Fanatics Blues

· The Goddess - Anima Mundi

· Spider

· Different Clothes

         More poetry...
News
· Seasons Greetings

· Poetry Life and Times Interviews Janet Caldwell

· Ian Thorpe on Christian Radio. Unbelieveable

· Season's Greetings

· July Poetry Life and Times

· Poetry Life and Times

· Ian's Audio online at last (specially for halloween)

Ian R Thorpe, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

  Man's Best Friend (humour)
by Ian R Thorpe
Saturday, May 14, 2005
Rated "R" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Ian R Thorpe
•  Armageddon
•  A Chronicle of Decay
•  Pigs WILL Fly
•  The Aspirational
•  In Byzantium
           >> View all 183


I've been so busy with recording, web site building and other things its a while since we had any fun. Let's try this one, its an oldie but always goes down well.


 

 


MAN’S BEST FRIEND

I bought my kids a puppy,
from the RSPCA
I thought they’d have a true friend
To take for walks each day.
We had to call him Zorro
Because he did not bite or bark
But everywhere in our house
He left his little mark.
I learned he was a "Soona Dog"
A rare and special breed
He’d sooner dump it in the house
than ever go outside.
Now dogs are sentient creatures
They need lots of love and care
and Zorro went and fell in love
with my favourite armchair.
He chewed the rugs, the bedding too
He made love to the sofa
But at last the day of reckoning came
When he chewed my Gucci loafers

I called a family conference
Said I can take no more you know
I’m a kind, forgiving person but
Me or that dog must go.
Next day arriving home from work
I found my suitcase on the step
With a note that said quite simply
"Love us, love our pet."

 
  

 

 

 

 


For once the animal was sober


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Reviewed by Ronald Hull 7/25/2005
Pets can bees that way.

Ron
Reviewed by Janet Caldwell 5/26/2005
You silly willy. My cat thinks he owns the place, lol. PETS!!! ;) I love you my Pet.

Jan xoxoxo
Reviewed by Maria Lupinacci 5/17/2005
LOL! Ian, great read! I have two dogs, my male has
been rebelling for some unknown reason and
every time we leave the house he chews on whatever
he can find...none of which is his!

I owe you a message, will send it tonight!
Reviewed by Mary Quire 5/15/2005
LOL. Oh, I know the feeling. I felt the same way when my husband brought, Mavis, a beagle puppy home to stay.
Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader) 5/14/2005
hahaha...poor baby...

Cute one.
Reviewed by E T Waldron 5/14/2005
A delight to read, thanks for the smiles Ian
always most welcome!;-)

Eileen
Reviewed by Nordette Adams 5/14/2005
Gave me a good warm chuckle, Ian. You know the dog steals the shoes, furniture, and objects of the one he loves, misses, or is most curious about in the house. LOL
*kisses*
Nordette
Reviewed by Katy Walsvik 5/14/2005
Ian, though I expected the ending, it didn't matter a bit... the delivery, the infectious rhythm and rhyme stole the show entirely! When you listen to your funny bone, skeletons everywhere start giggling. (grin) This is hilarious! katy xox
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 5/14/2005
awwwwwwwwww guess who still sleeping in the dogbox???

Funny you!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 5/14/2005
HO HO! Zorro Strikes Again! And I can truly relate, one of my mutts ate all me shoes but one pair - and I guard them with me life!

Books by
Ian R Thorpe



Blöd Ties





A Stroke of Luck





Millennium Dawn (anthology)

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