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Mr. Ed

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Member Since: Apr, 2003

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· My Dog Is My Hero

· Where The Redwing Sings

· Through Katrina's Eyes, Poems from an Animal Rescuer's Soul

· Mystery of Madera Canyon

· Cemetery Island

· Gold River Canyon

· Curious Creatures - Wondrous Waifs, My Life with Animals

Short Stories
· The Easter Skunk

· The Dog At The Drive-Thru Window

· Home For The Holidays

· Two Bonded Street Orphans, In From The Cold

· A Survivor's Tale

· Pigs, Turtles, and Bugs!

· Gentle Cemetery Dog Finally Safe

· Freezing, Starving, and Scared

· A Home For The Holidays

· The Dog On The Tracks

· I Am a Dog, Not a Thing

· Ghost Dog Rescued From Hot Dog Stand

· February is 'National Spay/Neuter Awareness' Month

· The 2014 Home 4 The Holidays Campaign

· Saving Our Canine Vets, This Veterans Day

· November is 'Adopt-A-Senior-Pet' Month

· National Pit Bull Awareness Day

· Keep Your Pets Safe This Halloween

· October is 'Adopt-A-Dog' Month

· Pet Theft Is On The Rise

· It's Poppy Time Once More

· Please Don't Worry So Much, H.P.

· Meatloaf Matlack

· A Walk With Dogs

· Earth Day Blues

· What Have We Become

· The Victims of Our Cruelty

· The Shredding Machine

· Happy Easter From Valentino

· A Woodland Chat

         More poetry...
· Chicken Soup for the Soul: Loving Our Dogs

· The Daily Mews

· Where The Redwing Sings

· Another Review For Curious Creatures-Wondrous Waifs

· Recipient of the 2006 Merial Human-Animal Bond Award

· International Writing Award

· My Animal Book Wins an Award

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  Rain - Glorious Rain!
by Mr. Ed
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Mr. Ed
•  It's Poppy Time Once More
•  Please Don't Worry So Much, H.P.
•  Meatloaf Matlack
•  A Walk With Dogs
•  Earth Day Blues
           >> View all 1,518



“In your life expect some trouble
But when you worry
You make it double,
So don't worry, be happy...”


Bobby McFerrin,

Don’t Worry, Be Happy



I wearily awoke at the very crack of dawn

In this the third month of our summer drought

When suddenly I heard the unmistakable sound

Of rooftop raindrops – of this there was no doubt


I jumped out of bed in a very excited frenzy

And I rushed out to the backyard in my BVDs

My two mutts were immediately in very hot pursuit

Their parched furry bodies now also filled with glee


As the three of us very merrily splished and splashed about

In the refreshing cool downpour and the fresh thick wet mud

I eventually thought I heard my lovely spouse calling out to me

And soon I heard her tapping on the window pane ‘thud, thud, thud’


As I looked back toward our rain-drenched window

I thought I saw her standing there all sweet and giggly

So I merrily shouted and waved right back at her

Although her true demeanor I swear I did not see


Suddenly the dark heavens above us in the drenched backyard

Began thundering and heavy bolts of lightning soon appeared

So the three of us raced back through the open kitchen door

And that’s when we ran smack dab into my greatest fear


“While you and your two pals were out merrily skinny dipping

Our old sump pump motor died, and there’s water everywhere,

And just look at all this mud and dirt you’ve now just dragged in!”

And that’s just about when she gave me her very best spousal glare


As she bolted out the front door on her way to work

I heard her yelling at the top of her lungs in quite the rage

“You better get this old house in tip top shape today, Mister,

Or when I get home tonight there’ll surely be hell to pay!”


As my now two very disloyal dogs raced away to hide in the closet

I wearily trudged down to the basement and began my tedious work

Of finally installing that new sump pump I’d been putting off installing

And now glumly feeling like quite the defeated old fart and imbecilic jerk


Several hours later after working most of the rainy day away

And then bathing both dogs and mopping up the kitchen floor

As I wearily began undressing for a well deserved soothing bath

I looked around the bathroom and now was stricken with horror


My three cherished childhood rubber duckies

Had been somehow left out in the backyard

So I raced back out into the stormy afternoon

And searched for them everywhere near and far


That’s just when our far too nosy neighbor Mrs. Jenkins

Stuck her very nosy face out a tiny crack in her backdoor

And soon yelled at the very top of her old geriatric lungs

“You imbecilic man, you’ll not see those little toys anymore!”


In every life we have some trouble,
So I’m not gonna worry and make it double,
But if Mrs. Jenkins doesn’t give back my rubber duckies,

There will be hell to pay…




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Reviewed by Katy Walsvik 7/30/2005
You tell 'er, sonny! Harrumph on Mrs. Jenkins!

Sigh... when I saw that your new post was a sequel AND that it was about rain, well you can imagine my glee so I'm starting here...

Siiiiiiigh... a man after my own rain-loving heart, indeed. You've written many pieces that have delighted me, tickled me and just plain collapsed me with giggles and smiles but I gotta tell you, Little Eddie, this rain one may have taken the cake! (left out in the rain?) hehe... Jays, I love this! Now, on to Part II... katy xox p.s. this also sounds like proof of that old adage 'men marry their mothers'... ok, fine! Now you wanna slap me. I dare ya!
Reviewed by Alexandra* OneLight*® Authors & Creations 7/28/2005
And glorious poem, too, so happy it is, indeed, in spite of the flooded basement, and, oh nasty people who don't know how to have fun and can't stomach it in others... like that pinched-nose lady who can't dance in the rain and kidnaps rubber duckies! lol! I hope that the basement has remained dry, and that you have gotten your duckies back, dear Ed, while I'm sure that you already got many loving and forgiving hugs from your lovely wife!
May you have a blessed and happy day (rainy or not)! :0)
Reviewed by Kate Clifford 7/27/2005
Stolen rubber duckies! Now that is a nightmare! I could see you playing in the puddles.............I would of been washing my hair outside.......good for soft hair :-) Great write.
Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader) 7/27/2005
Ed's sing-ing in the rain. Watch out for the copper, and mrs jenkins after yer chopper...
Fun fun fun one buddy boy..
Reviewed by Tracey L. O' Very (Reader) 7/26/2005
OH Ed Thanks so much. I could use that rain! Big time!!!Tis Monsoon season although no rain, and goes east to west right? so send it on over red rover, and you know what they'll be no spousal hell to pay, I sent mine away so I can just play play play!! (c :)

This is such a fun little poem although no fun for you. I hope you get yer rubber duckies back tell Mrs Jenkins I'm on my way if she doesn't ok??

Thanks So Much ED. This is just what I needed! Perfect in every way!(c :) xoox 42 (c :)


My dogs would always hide under the kitchen table when he'd yell at me, no space in closets.
Reviewed by Lori Moore 7/26/2005
Reviewed by Nordette Adams 7/26/2005
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I needed a good laugh! Love you, Ed. ~~Nordette
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 7/26/2005

You bring back many memories of when I was a little girl, when it would be so hot, and it would start raining, I would BEG mom to let me go out and run around in long as it wasn't lightning and thundering, she'd usually okay it. Nothing felt as good as the rain cooling off my sweaty, steaming body! :)

An adorable write--very well penned. :)

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. :)
Reviewed by Paul Williams 7/26/2005
LOl, Oh no! not the ducks, man she's a bad woman.

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 7/26/2005
Just laughing and laughing..till tears came from my eyes as my imagination got the better side ...the pinky side of me....tee-hee!!

Love Tinky!!
Reviewed by Kate Burnside 7/26/2005
Aha! Caught red-handed and you red-faced, I'll bet! That Mrs Jenkins just wants a repeat performance in HER backyard, I reckon, after peeking through the crack in her fence as well as the crack in her door!! How is it dear Rebecca always heartily gets my sympathy vote?! If I didn't know you better, Elk, I reckon you'da made this up... but, nope, have to admit this does sound VERY like The Mad Animal Man of Bonkers Boulevard to me... Gene Kelly Al Nuddy - watch out for that umbrella spoke! paKamaK Kate xx
Reviewed by Sue Hess 7/26/2005
what a least you got to play first
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 7/26/2005

delightful write, eddie! so nice to read this today; thank you for sharing this wonderfully happy piece! love the art too! you are sooo clever!! well done! bravo!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in tx., karen lynn. :D
Reviewed by Ed Matlack 7/26/2005
Thanks for the good early morning laugh,
And thankfully you finally took a bath...Ed
Reviewed by Carole Mathys 7/26/2005
Just the type of humorous read one needs on a day that's over 100, oh by the the ducks at all cost....great write Ed!

Peace, Carole
Reviewed by George Carroll 7/26/2005
Ha Ha a real gas of a write. Always a joy to read your exploits and garner a laugh or two.
Reviewed by m j hollingshead 7/26/2005
oh no NOT the ducks!!
enjoyed the read
Reviewed by Abdi-Noor Mohamed (Eagle Of Hope) 7/26/2005
There is already some worry in here Ed which you are concealing for the sole reason of not doubling it. If recovery of duckies from Mrs. Jenkins becomes impossible will there be hell to pay? Don't worry, Ed. Be happy, be happy Ed.

Books by
Mr. Ed

Where The Redwing Sings

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My Dog Is My Hero

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Curious Creatures - Wondrous Waifs, My Life with Animals

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Through Katrina's Eyes, Poems from an Animal Rescuer's Soul

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Cemetery Island

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Gold River Canyon

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Mystery of Madera Canyon

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  1. Democracy at Work
  2. Over internet-ed...
  3. This is Ed's computer talking...
  4. From the Institute of Word-ology
  5. Sunny Days and Mondays
  6. SUCK...
  7. Smile, Darn It
  8. Mushmouth Kostro...
  9. My Ass Is Grass
  11. Summer Doth Approach...
  12. Reincarnation
  13. A Guitar
  14. Have You Seen Ur-Anus?
  15. Wednesday was 70 Degrees...
  16. Kostro's always pickin' on me...AGAIN
  17. The Toilet Seat
  18. My Good Friday Procedure
  19. Sadie Graylow
  20. Confusion say: Men who play with selves r

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