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Meredith Dixon

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Member Since: Oct, 2005

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Darwin's Blind Spot
by Frank Ryan

A different way of looking at evolution, now increasingly espoused in leading scientific journals, universities and presentations...  
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Fast Eddie
by Meredith Dixon
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Rated "PG13" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Meredith Dixon
•  The Final Crushing of a Child
•  Remember I Was There
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•  We Wait For You
           >> View all 102

Walked into the casino
and saw you playing there.
You had forgotten us once again
and I had not a clue
as to that was you!

Oh, you were my Teddy Bear
sometimes these past few years with claws
and a roar to chase us away.
But I thought in time you could be tame.

You stumbled on to something new
thought at first it was your wandering need to be alone and free.
Even thought once it was another woman
you were pursuing and not really me.

I had to go there and I had to see
what became of the husband to be.
There you were in your element
you were looking so happy and content.

Rolling the dice and women hanging on
not just to your every word but on your arm.
Fawning over you; it made me sick.
I know you better and they are just a trick.

High Roller
when did you become that?
Knew of your addictions
but this one just came out of your hat.

I know temptation but this was new
Thought you wanted us
and not to overdo.

We gave you more than you needed
but now I've seen addiction first hand.
You left me a note to say you'd be back.
We woke up and you were gone.

The little one now knows the truth
but didn't see you as I did that night.
Your eyes were burning so bright.
Your money was pouring out.
The drinks were comin' and not just for you.
Your lust was coming out.
We can't satisfy a man like you.

Your lusts get satisfied, then change and hit you.
Thought it was wine, women and song.
Now it's the gambling and it went all wrong.

I am not judging you
but so glad I saw.
Pulled out because this was the last straw.
Your overdue bills took away the future
you planned for us.
Couldn't wait for you when I added it all up.

I swear I understand
but I don't want to be caught in that painful strand.
I will always be here for you
and you know it; you know it's true .

I wish that I could have taped you laughing that night.
Thinking everything would be all right.
But too many nights came and went.
Your life changed forever and now it wil take so long
for any of us to hear your happy song.

you would laugh and then get so blue.
How could so much fun destroy the true you?
How could so many kicks lure you away?
Why would you want to lose us this way?
Couldn't you have done this years ago?
But it's too late now and you know it so.

Must be fun to have women all around
I could do the same
and be taken advantage of too.
But I don't want men hanging over me
just to see if I will buy them a drink or three.
To see if I am easy or like this game more.
You would have died in your steps if you had seen me like that.
If it would have helped you, I would have played along.
But it was too smoky and I ran along.

Fast Daddy, you're such a clown.
Fast Eddie, you're such a fool.
These people are stealing from you.

You told me it's the excitement and the lights.
I'd rather go dancing instead.
But you chose to fool around with machines instead.

Can't compete with a cold, money machine grabber; it's true .
Wouldn't even try
it's not worth it to lose.

You've lost your car and your dignity for now.
Hoping that you learned your lesson,
Fast Eddie this time.
But I don't think that you have found your rhyme.

You left her; driven away that is true .
you wanted us and it was so sweet for you.
But now I know you weren't over her
Once again, it was way too soon.

Those trips you promised us
and other things, too.
Was it worth the gamble you took all those nights being a fool?
Don't want to rub the salt in all of your wounds but I can't believe it could happen to you.

Now you're alone and you won't get me back.
I've seen you on too fast of a track.
You had plenty of time to do your mid-life thing.
You've had tons of time to party it up.

Please forgive me if I sound so cruel
I am so sorry that I was a fool
wasting my time is not worth a dime.
And throwing away your future for a time.

But here I am watching over you.
Fast Eddie, you break my heart.
I don't want to come to your funeral
so play it smart.
Don't want to pass your hat around to pay for the funeral; it would be too hard.

It's up to you and I wish you well
but if you go there
you're wasting your life.
You wanted fishing and traveling around
You wanted us and a home for us all.
But Fast Eddie, how ever could it have been done?
When the lure is there in your own backyard?

I think it's smoky, and loud and I can't afford it.
It could be me there
but I learned already what it did to our friends.
Fast Eddie, why does it take you so long to learn?

No wonder the money was gone
no wonder the food was not there
Poor Eddie, you make me cry
but now I accept it and we can be friends.

Oh, Eddie, can't you see what she wants?
She doesn't just want your money but your soul, too!
You know the Lord will help you get away.
Run, Eddie, run as fast as you can.
I don't want to see it again.

If you do it again
and throw the rest of it away.
I'll still be here
but I won't have much to say.
You're too smart
and I don't have the heart
to see you kill yourself
in the ways that you have.

Fast Eddie, don't slow down too much.
We love you but it's time now for lunch.
Do you even have enough money to do your laundry?
Can't you see it's a quarter to three?
I can't be your Mother or bodyguard.
I think that I could have spent all of that cash another way
and see results that would really pay.

But I'm not judging
but it's too bad
you have made yourself and others so very sad.

Fast Eddie, good luck to you............



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Reviewed by Regis Auffray
You made the right decision, Meredith. Addictions are a curse in this world and they take on many forms. Love and peace to you,

Regis
Reviewed by Felix Perry
You were wise to say goodbye and let your life ride on away a from him, sickness maybe but one you and your little one don't need or shouldn't have to deal with.

Felix
Reviewed by George Carroll
Gambling, drinking are a curse to the family and it's little surprise that you said good-bye.
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