Stalked (A Tricouplet)
by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner
Monday, January 16, 2006
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Inspired by Jerry Bolton's creative genius.
STALKED (A Tricouplet) *
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
embers announce a newborn as
fire begat fire:
on white-hot sheets of flame, a beast
with yellow eyes
twists on its umbilical cord
in strengthening winds.
it learns to graze;
the fields, ablaze.
the monster's breath sears the sun
which turns blood-red;
smoke chugs from its nostrils; i taste
bitter on my tongue, sharp like glass
deep in my lungs,
as it draws near.
this is MY disaster, the
because i prayed the rain away.
it's my fault.
the devil parting burning grass
searches for me
as its next snack ...
must watch my back.
(c) 2006, Karla Dorman.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
* Hey, I only get one hour on the computer; besides, I ran out of words. Thanks, Jerry, for the inspiration! Hope I did it proud. :)
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|Reviewed by Safi Abdi
|Fantastic write! Safi|
|Reviewed by Michelle Kidwell Power In The Pen
|Excellent write as always Karla
|Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
one word, BRAVA!!
|Reviewed by Sage Sweetwater
|Well done, Karla! Takes like a match to a light ... torched this one, baby! Sending some rain your way. Get out your rain barrel and catch it to wash your hair!
|Reviewed by Carole Mathys
|Fabulous write Karla!
Love and peace to you
|Reviewed by Sherry Heim
|You have captured the rage and terror of fire in this beautiful poem, Karla. I saw clouds crossing over Texas on the radar today and I wondered if any rain had fallen. I am guessing no, by what you have written here. We were supposed to get snow and rain from the clouds today but Yansa, the Goddess of wind, inhaled the clouds and blew them on toward Texas.
|Reviewed by Tinka Boukes
|Stunning work Karla!!
|Reviewed by Felix Perry
|You did super well, this is an inspired work and one to be very proud of, well done.
|Reviewed by Paul Williams
|Stunning piece Karla, your pen done Jerry proud girl.
|Reviewed by Kate Burnside
|I think this is truly one of your best, Karla! So spot-on atmospheric it summons all the appropriate emotions into a vivid fury... reminds me of the nightmares I had when I was sick with a perpetual high fever, such that I had the rigours; there was always someone out to get me and was burning me to the ground! Hellish or what?? Excellent diction and form... irrespective of time and word pressures! :)) TY Kate xx AND for all your love and prayers for my Mum... she is hangin in there! xx|
|Reviewed by Dee C.
|Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader)
|I got ya, I like it, very much. Thanks for trying it out, even if it is a short. I know a lot of folks don't like long poems, but I do. thanks again. Will send you something in the morning.|
|Reviewed by Phillip William Allen
|An amazing pen Karla.|
|Reviewed by Birgit and Roger Pratcher
|Great Karla, you are amazing,
(((Hugs))) Birgit and Roger
|Reviewed by Kate Clifford
|You did more then make it proud you brought it to life! Fantastic write. I could feel the heat. It's not your fault; nature does as nature pleases.|
|Reviewed by Joseph* OneLight*®
|I think you did Jerry's form proud, Karla.
Love & Light,
|Reviewed by E T Waldron
|Karla with this write you have just proved beyond a doubt , your worth as a poet. I hope you will remember this one every time you begin to doubt yourself. Hang it on your fridge! Dynamic poetry with vibrant visuals that stoke the imagination. I like the tricouplet, fantastic!
|Reviewed by email@example.com Bennett
|This was your own words as nobody else can write as you. We all are dierent but what matters is that you are writing and it is going all around the world no matter what you write is a blessing for all us to read. God Bless.|
|Reviewed by Ron (sketchman) Axelson
|You did it fantastic.....