I see your eyes now so full of acceptance
Acceptance of what you feel is beyond
Beyond your ability to control
Control that slips away easily as silvered water
Water under the bridge in the wasted years
Years when a job canít be kept for long
Long for the times when this all started
Started you on this slippery path
Path of self destruction and sorrow
Sorrow of lonely times of friends long gone
Gone the way of the money and time
Time so long gone is haunting the soul
Soul you donít even think is worth much
Much regrets and hopeless, helpless, reluctance
Reluctance to really look at your acceptance
Acceptance of that which you have become
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|Reviewed by Nagamuthu Osho
It is the truth of your word, like the ford of faith, pouring the knowledge to sharp the mind's blunt edges. The gist to the poems becomes the serene solacing the turbulent, rudiment mind. This is a great Poem. God Bless you.
|Reviewed by Barbara Terry
|Thank you Sandi, for this very heartfelt and enlightening poem. Your words talk to me, even tho I am not chemically dependent, but does talk to me of my own acceptance for the journey that started when I was born, and is just now coming into fruition.
Everyone tells me I am very brave to put my life out on the line for everyone to see. But I'm not really tho. I am very insecure, and if I had to talk about this in a public forum, face to face, I would run, and run very fast and not stop til I found a very dark hole to crawl in. But, I am better at voicing my anxieties, fears, doubts, happiness (one of my doubts), sadness, when I write. It seems that when I write, I am so lost in another universe, that there is no return. My writing gives me temporary comfort from all the hell I was forced to go through, and not only in my adolescence either, because while my mother was still alive, she terrified me. She passed away on Groundhog Day, 1997 of lung cancer. She was 68 years old.
I cry so much at night, and when I am feeling so down, that the tears just flow. The question I have been asking, will never be answered, even tho I think I know some of it. But, the answer goes much deeper than my being a transsexual child tho. "In the best interest of the child,," is a poor lousy excuse to deny me my girlhood. OMG I am so sorry, I am rambling again. I didn't mean to.
Thank you too, for the review of "Should I Write A Novel." It is very much appreciated.
May the Lord Jesus bless you, and those whom you love, and be with you always, and at your side constantly. With much love in my heart, joy to the world, peace on earth, & (((((((((((MANY WONDERFUL SISTERLY HUGGGGSSSS)))))))))), your little den sister, Barbie
"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."