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Divinity 11 11

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Member Since: Dec, 2003

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by Divinity 11 11
Saturday, April 01, 2006
Not rated by the Author.
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           >> View all 63

Crowds of faces, noises and lights

Blur by as the spin goes on.

Round and round to the tinkling

And piercing sounds of carnival music

On crappy sound systems.


The bright exciting lights and sound

Had called to them as they passed by.

They wondered at what they found,

And upon entering the carnivale extraordinaire,

Were promptly given a handful of tickets to spend

However they so chose.


Without exploration,

Promptly accepting the first barker’s offer,

They boarded the “merry-love-go-round”.


Merriment and love are always good,

And obviously worth all of their given tickets

Except just one lonely stub.



When they first stepped aboard,

The idea seemed novel and fun.

Sitting upon an animal of plastic

On a warm summer day,

A separate observer of all around.

One with those who chose a seat

Beside and around them, they prepare

For the promised peaceful ride.


But something goes astray,

The idea was not so sound.

Everything accelerates as

The one fills itself with

The given sugary poison of cotton candy

And weighted carbs of powdered funnel cakes.


The sickness overcomes them as

The fluffy and funneled ideas

Spin along with them.

The music loses its cheerful melody

And becomes a garbled, piercing sound

That acts as a thousand needles

Piercing consciousness as they spin on

Out of control.


Now tortured by the ride that never stops,

They lose their grip and fall.

Flying from their seat,

They hang in mid air momentarily

Before crashing to the concrete below,

Hitting rock bottom.


As they feel the sting of scrapes and bruises,

A lucidity is gelled, and things no longer a blur.

They pick themselves up,

Wobbly at first, and promptly regurgitate

The garbage they had crammed within,

And with an empty stomach,

They learn to walk on solid ground.


They push through the crowd of others

In line to swirl on the carousel of fools,

And head for the nearest exit

Determined the carnival’s a

Carefully construe d device.


Just before they find their way

Back to the serenity beyond the gates,

A Voice is heard that calls to them,

Offering the chance to win a prize.


They turn around and see

A brightly colored booth of balloons

Awaiting a sharp point.

The stuffed deistic animals all in a row, beckon,

And the one thinks about

How nice it would be to have some

Comfort late at night.


They shake a bit as the barker calls

And reach inside their pocket.

They sadly pull out the one crumpled ticket

As they stare at the sign that asks for three.


The barker snidely smiles and says,

“I’ll make a deal for you.”

He hands them a dart and whispers

The key to winning.


The dart is thrown and misses,

But the ever understanding barker

Hands them another dart.

Grateful for the acceptance,

They try again and again…..and again.

The compassion of another barker is soothing

As he supplies another handful of tickets and

Suggests another game.


Determined to be a winner

And walk away with something,

The One plays on, moving down the line.

Finding themselves lost again in the night

Amidst the swirling lights and plinking sounds

Of carnival music on a crappy sound system.



Dogged Dream Productions
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Reviewed by m j hollingshead 4/8/2006
well done
Reviewed by jude forese 4/7/2006
your eyes knows how to recognize the depth of experience and your pen knows how to capture it ... well done!
Reviewed by Phillip William Allen 4/7/2006
Having worked my 16-19th years on fair and carnival lots, I enjoy the perfection of this pen. Well done
Reviewed by William DeVault 4/2/2006
I really like this. Excellent work, O boobilicious one!
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 4/2/2006
Your creation is deserving of much more than a single reading, Jessica. Thank you for sharing this gift. Love and peace to you,

Reviewed by June Thompson 4/2/2006
very interesting write. It makes me think of ones struggle to win over love and in life... how desperate one can be to obtain that one thing they are looking for.
Reviewed by Peter Paton 4/2/2006
Your Muse has taken an even more intense and metaphysical depth, in this exhilirating and dramatic pen, which is top heavy with symbolism, emotion and sentiment...and a barely concealed metaphorical feel about it..
Your literary skills are extraordinary !
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