Alexis' complex background catches up with him and appears to be at the root of his existential malaise. He was brought up a Catholic, while his father was an Italian Jew..
Stuck in the Laundromat at five am
I was lost in a world unknown
From the speaker above
Came the song – like a code
An activation of a moth-balled killer
The keywords tripped in combo
Goodbye stranger,
It’s been nice.
Hope you’ll find your
Paradise.
In a sweeping flush
My past rushed at me
From all sides, surrounding
In hibernation – I killed a man
A Glock 10mm – steady in hand
Porcelain innards
Teflon rounds
At a Starbucks in Prague
I gunned a man down
I felt betrayed folding socks
And dropping quarters into
The old metal abyss of my forgotten soul
Goodbye Mary,
Goodbye Jane.
Will we ever
Meet again?
I felt no sorrow, and felt no shame
About all the men I’d planted
That I’d never see again
I had no regrets about the political targets erased
The unknown little girl’s mommies and daddies
I poisoned in foreign plazas over green tea and sushi
I’m a machine
Logical – digital – dependable
A man with a weapon
A nightmare in a pin-striped black suit
That I’ll forget about in moments forward
I’m trying to tell you
What I’ve learned
I know how it sounds
It sounds absurd
Please tell me
I just don’t know
Who I am
My memories have been removed
to protect the information
My life has been dissected and served back
After much careful consideration
Feel no sorrow,
Feel no shame.
Come tomorrow,
Feel no pain.
But when the words come down
From the command line interrupt
A DOS prompt in the back-brain
Network Addressing at its finest
A Carriage Return Execution
Sleeper cell caressing
The code awakes me, sends me
The church mouse husband
Camouflaged in my front room
Evolves into the Treadstone killer
In the full moon.
Tried to see your
Point of view
Hope your dreams
Will all come true