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Ed Matlack

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Member Since: Aug, 2003

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Featured Book
War Stories for My Grandchildren - A Memoir in Short Stories
by Jansen Estrup

The author served during many of the Cold War's most intense years, including 5 tours to Southeast Asia, but it was as a child that he fought his most courageous battles...  
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Ear Wax...the Other Snot...
by Ed Matlack
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Rated "G" by the Author.
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If ya can’t eat it,


Then enjoy the smell,


Pick it out with your pinky,


Or a Q-tip will do just as well…


 


Soap and water unavailable,


A paper towel works good too,


Watch the monkeys in the zoo,


They enjoy a feast of ear wax,


Just as much as could you…


 


Won’t gain weight,


Will end life anyway in a crate,


Goin’ fishin’, makes great bait,


Don’t of me, because of my likes,


berate…J


© ed J 1/20/08

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Reviewed by Patrick Granfors 11/2/2009
OoooKKKK.
Earwax is yellow
Boogers are green
This poem ranks about
The grossest I've seen
Not that it matters
We're friends at the den
We just accept
What squirts out of the pen

Patrick
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 1/27/2008
A secret fish lure? Have to quit peeing on my bait.

Ron
Reviewed by Kathy Armijo 1/25/2008
New and interesting concept on the idea of re-cycling????? lol

God bless you. Kathy
Reviewed by Dawn Anderson 1/22/2008
Oh that's sooooooooooooooo gross......lol.
Reviewed by Tom Hyland 1/21/2008
ED ... LOVE THE TITLE!

Although it is probably much safer than BOOGERS, 'cause they contain MSR's -
a recent KILLER . the University of Maryland Hospital, here.

I constantly GROW it, PICK it, but DON'T EAT it!

Be careful w/ cuetips or other items in ear - better to use warm water and syringe!

I don't care to even know what you do with your ... DINGLE-BERRIES !!!


UGH! TK
Reviewed by Georg Mateos 1/21/2008
Brother PeeWee said it all, we will start saving "it" for your next Xmas present you disgusting frog!!!!!
With brotherly love
Ed (the Elder)
Reviewed by Ch'erie de Perrot 1/20/2008
It'snot funny ED, grossing me out here....

Acutally our cat loves ear wax, and so does Duchess if she gets half a chance. Must be nutrients in it for them. N of course they are giving you a free bath, what more could yah ask fer hahahaha.

OH Dear, the winter must be dreary for you there, as it is weird here. Half the country is underwater from the floods, well our drought is over, as are the crops, herds etc etc, national disaster up north, and flowing into the Murray river here, which we need.
All good, all happnin mate
Hugs
Ch'erie
Reviewed by Daniel McTaggart 1/20/2008
Ed, are you getting bored?
Reviewed by J. Allen Wilson 1/20/2008
it works good on the coffee table and boots as well sir...give it a try, but you will need about 3 ounces
Reviewed by Lynn Barry 1/20/2008
Wax poetic...given new meaning...you are one funny dude...HUGS
Reviewed by Ron (sketchman) Axelson 1/20/2008
If you can write about ear wax I reckin
I can write about anything.
Reviewed by Susan de Vegter 1/20/2008
Fishing with earwax?? Now that's gotta be novel. You sure make me laugh Ed. Keep them coming.
Love and blessings!
Susan
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 1/20/2008
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...gross LOL Just what I didn't want to read, after having cereal...nice. Going to go take a bath!

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 1/20/2008
My dogs love it smeared on their Milkbones. But it's definitely an acquired taste, just like toe jam.

Bon Appetite, Bro!! (And now, I know what to get ya next Christmas. I better start savin some, right now.)
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