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Lisa M Tidrow

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Endings and Beginnings
by Lisa M Tidrow

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Recent poems by Lisa M Tidrow
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Ending and Beginnings

Lying in the hospital bed
Hearing that I might soon be dead
Because a surgeon made a mistake
But he tries to slither out of it like a snake

I was supposed to have removed a varicose vein
But when I awoke, Oh my God, the pain
Iím 26 years old and theyíve ended my life
All because I trusted the man wielding the knife

He took out the only vein carrying blood to my heart
Leaving the blood pooling in my leg with no way to depart
My leg is so swollen that you can see each and every pore
And Iím told that itís filled with blood clots forevermore

2 more surgeries to try and rectify the damage done
Little do I know that it has only just begun
Next Iím told they will amputate my leg
But it will be too high to get a prosthetic instead

6 months in a wheelchair is what I endure
Being told that there will never be a cure
I just want them to cut off the leg which is my bane
I am sick and tired of feeling nothing but pain

But then Iím told that the phantom pain will be worse
Because they canít treat it with drugs, itíll become my curse
I just want to die and be shod of the pain and the misery
So they take me to a head shrinker and give her my history

My Dad finds a new surgeon and even he is dismayed
He is the best in the country, definitely first grade
He thinks he can save my leg and reduce the swelling
But as to long term results, there is just no telling

4 more surgeries which I painfully endure
Then we await, the verdict still unsure
The news is good, the leg is saved
The swelling is reduced just as I craved

Thereíll always be pain night and day
That even the strongest drugs wonít allay
But at least I can walk and I still have my leg
Though when the painís really bad, I wish I were dead

Iím 26 years old and life as I know has ended
I donít think about the things with which Iíve contended
Through the depression I just cannot see
That a new beginning is waiting for me

But that is another story which is yet to be told
And what seems to be copper is sometimes Gold
There will be tears and there will be laughter
But I think I can promise you a happy ever after

Unfortunately a true story of surgery which went drastically wrong...

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