Iolanthe Woulff, click here
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The form of this piece is, of course, "borrowed" (ahem) from Edward Lear's incomparable nonsense poem THE AKOND OF SWAT. In my dreams, I fancy that Mr. Lear might've liked it.
Whence and wherefore,
who, what, why,
the frabjous Cat?!
Does he lie around the house all day,
yawning and sleeping life away,
not giving a doggone, as they say,
or a DRAT?
The complacent Cat.
Does he turn his nose up at his food?
Subject you to his offended mood?
Adopt a superior attitude
just like THAT?
The disdainful Cat.
Does he always want out when he's in?
Can he caterwaul a horrid din?
Is it true the beast has always been
such a BRAT?
The impertinent Cat.
Does he concert nightly on the picket?
Will he gladly eat a roach? A cricket?
Does he think you really ought to stick it
in your HAT?
The insouciant Cat.
Does he think that dogs are pathetic fools?
Dumb, contemptible human tools,
slavishly following nitwit rules
for a PAT?
The disgusted Cat.
When it's time for his esteem to woo,
will he offer up the deference due,
or make it clear he thinks less of you
than a GNAT?
The dismissive Cat.
Does he love you true , or merely feign?
Can he purr to soothe, when you're in pain?
Will he stick by you come snow or rain,
The pragmatic Cat!
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|Reviewed by Regis Auffray
|Delightfully clever, thank you for sharing your gifts, lolanthe. Love and peace,
|Reviewed by D Johnson
|Quite funny...I have never thought of a cat as pragmatic, perhaps self-centered, ornery, single minded, contrarian at best, arrogant at worst, and I know I' m leaving something out, but for now, your poem has proven to be 'purrrfect.'
|Reviewed by Dayvid Graybill
|That is just delightful Lannie! I don't really like cats (although I have to admit I've lived with quite a few) and this was a very fun piece!
|Reviewed by Laurel Lamperd
|Just like Basil, my cat. Laurel|
|Reviewed by Connie Faust
|Fantastic writing! Not being familiar with THE AKOND OF SWAT, I can only gape, open-mouthed, at the style and complexity of this amazing poem.