When I look into your eyes
I see the person I want to be
I see the couple I want us to be
At night
When you are not here
I have to imagine
Your arms around me
Your breath on my cheek
Your lips on my neck
And only when I imagine this
Can I close my eyes to sleep
And it feels like you are here
Next to me
Sleeping a little more soundlessly
And when I wake up
I have to imagine
That you've gone to work
Extra early
I have to put two cups of coffee out
I have to have two plates at meals
And when I turn the news on
I sometimes need to have
Little conversations
With myself
Because you are not here
And all the other things I have to ignore
The extra toothbrush
Your favourite cereal
Our morning showers
And when you wake me up
When you return
You notice
The pillow
Lying beside my body
And when we finally crawl
Out of our cocoon in bed
You ask me
Why are there so many
Cold
Forgotten
Coffees on the bench
And why
Are there so many
left over meals in the fridge
It's a game we play
And then we sit
Eating leftovers
And drinking reheated coffee