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Joanne D Dube

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Member Since: Jul, 2010

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Bipolar Blues and Hues
by Joanne D Dube
Thursday, July 08, 2010
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Recent poems by Joanne D Dube
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How it really feels like to be Bipolar.

Bipolar Blues and Hues

So I am bipolar
There's two of me inside
It seems like forever
Always trying to hide
The fear, anger, despair
Being misunderstood
Getting high, getting there
Ever since my childhood

Spending all my money
On trinkets and not care
Everything is funny
Then I become aware
And it really pains me
No one else is laughing
Here comes my other side
My mind can't stop racing

Forgot about my pride
Can not erase the Past
Living in the moment
The good times never last
Alone in the Present
I go swirling downward
My other me takes hold
I become a coward
The poker players fold

Avoiding the mirror
No light, no noise, just fear
Migraines lurk and terror
Just want to disappear
Thinking of suicide
I'm too chicken to jump
Not knowing where to hide
Just to escape this slump

No one hears me, I sigh
Thoughts are incoherent
Don't really want to die
My poles are so different
Speak another language
Never knowing my friend
Never on the same page
When will these feelings end

I quarrel with myself
Which one of me to find
To be put on a shelf
Can not make up my mind
It's not just self pity
I can't sleep well at night
Stress and anxiety
Make me constantly fight

Medications galore
And psychotherapy
My doctor I implore
Help me become happy
I have much to offer
A heart in the right place
Always help the poorer
My life is a wide space

I take my pills daily
Three antidepressants
Caring for my body
And for my sentiments
Through my ups and my downs
I can never be sure
If my face has a frown
Although my smile is pure.

December 16, 2008
By: Joanne Denise Dube

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