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Iolanthe Woulff

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Member Since: May, 2010

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· She's My Dad

· A British Petroleum Afternoon

· Mom-in-Law

· That P Word

· Organized Religion

· So Long, Mr. Hot Pants

· Slough of Despond

· Lament for Eden

· The Faithbug

· Rain of Toxic Terror

· Infertility's Child

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Books by Iolanthe Woulff
  Malibu Majesty
by Iolanthe Woulff
Monday, July 12, 2010
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Iolanthe Woulff
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           >> View all 56

I imagine that most of us, at one time or another, have encounted some version of this not-so-sweet young thing.

 Her Royal Highness of Malibu
is, like, totally awesome. See?
Faux nose in the air
and her beach blonde hair
means she’s better than you and me.

She rules with her Daddy’s credit cards,
wielding Visa and Amex Gold.
Though she’s seventeen,
drives a Benz that’s green,
with her attitude spoiled and cold.

She spends hours working out at the gym
to ensure that she stays size two.
Her jeans are so tight
her buns are a sight:
two shrink-wrapped tomatoes in blue.

At school she’s the queen of the rich kids,
and the cheerleader chief as well.
The boys are her slaves,
though to her, they’re knaves,
and she’s always late for the bell.

Someday she will get her comeuppance,
and I can’t wait, truth be told.
There will come a day
she won’t have her way,
‘cause she’ll wake up and find she’s… old.






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Reviewed by D Johnson
I agree, just wait til nature tells her that it's time to go gray.

Reviewed by John Flanagan
...and we have a few of them here in Singapore, too, Lannie, totally boring, empty people...but worth a poem.
Well said!

Reviewed by Mark Lichterman
Oh, yes! It does happen to all of us and then, in time, the surgery the Malibu Queen and those of her ilk have through the years will find the tautly stretched flesh of face does not quite match the wrinkles that cannot be removed about her throat, or the flesh that drops beneath her arms, or, in time, the thickning of the waist and the widening of the buttocks. Too bad, oh, Malibu Queen. Hearts bleeding for you? Nah, I think not.
Reviewed by Eileen Granfors
Oh, I've taught a few of these. . . it's the plain truth, Iolanthe.
Reviewed by Regis Auffray
So true, lolanthe; no one can escape life's inevitable conclusion; not even your "Royal Highness." Love and best wishes,

They should blind men at birth, a nice place and poem though Malibu, been there once, I know. Blessings! Jasmin Horst
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