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Mark M Lichterman

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  How Am I?
by Mark M Lichterman
Friday, August 13, 2010
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Mark M Lichterman
•  Words, I Need Words!
•  Really, What If
•  Sex Now
•  Smoke in The Wind
•  Young
           >> View all 410

For anyone wondering, it's only enlarged.

How Am I


How am I?

You ask,

how are you?

Well, let’s see:

Awaking this morning,

and awaking a good thing!

I awoke this morning

with buzzing in my head


damn tri-focals

computer image

fuzzy in one eye.

How am I?

How are you?

you ask.

Well let’s see:

Awoke this morning

with buzzing in my head

then found computer image

fuzzy in one eye


and that ain’t all,

damn prostate,

also had’a  pee



wasn’t able to pee,

leastways, not much.

How am I?

How are you?

you ask.

Well, let’s see:

Ears buzzing

eyes fuzzy

gott’a pee.

getting old,

well, yeah

you see,

now ears not buzzing

and eyes less fuzzy,

but damn,

gotta go

you see


damn prostate,

still gott’a pee.



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Reviewed by Kathleen McDonald 9/1/2010
Oh Markie, Ihope you are feeling better

Reviewed by Kathryn Seifert 8/18/2010
I understand. well done.
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila 8/15/2010
Chuckle!!! Aging is so much fun.....mostly because after a lifetime, we can finally laugh at ourselves! Loved this one, Regis!

Your friend,
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 8/14/2010
I have heard that's no fun, Mark but I'm sure many can relate. I do hope you feel better. Sending you love, peace, and best wishes,

Reviewed by Rose Rideout 8/14/2010
Well Markie, I must say getting old isn't fun and if this is true, you best get your butt to the Doctor. I have to say though, you do have a way with words dear.

Your #1 Newfie Friend Hugs, XOXOXO, Rose
Reviewed by Carole Mathys 8/14/2010
...this journey down the aging path is never boring, is it...just keep smiling!

Reviewed by Mary Lacey, Desertrat 8/14/2010

What can I say? I hope you soon get to pee! Sounds like you have a few other problems too. it isn't nice to laugh at others woes, but this was so darn funny. Enjoyed reading it.

Reviewed by Christine Tsen 8/14/2010
Oh Mark, I hope you are okay!
Maybe Vicky's right, you should take this seriously and make sure...
Or maybe, a ha! This may not be autobiographical at all!
I'm catching on, eh?
Take Care of yourself!!!
Reviewed by Victoria's Poetry & Voices of Muse 8/14/2010
I hope you are seeing your physician(s) about this Mark.
Our bodies are always offering us signals to our health.
and not being able to use the porcelain throne is a
life threatening situation which could be the buzzing...

Fresh Ground Coffee & Vanilla Cream
Reviewed by Patrick Granfors 8/13/2010
It's always good to awaken. Buzz head or fuzz head. Gotta go Gotta Go Gotta Go, Ho Ho Ho, Pink Giant. Perfect commercial. Somewhere between Dr Seuss and Golf Advertisements. Patrick
Reviewed by Felix Perry 8/13/2010
Funny but only if you can take life with a sense of humour...we age and things break down...

Books by
Mark M Lichterman

For Better or Worse

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The Climbing Boy

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  1. Sunny Days and Mondays
  3. My Ass Is Grass
  4. Sadie Graylow
  5. $
  6. Ah, Shucks
  7. Cell Phone Blues
  8. Catching Up With The Past
  9. The Toilet Seat
  10. Just Around The Corner
  11. Yes
  12. Halloween is Coming!
  13. What Part Of No Don't You Understand?
  14. Mushmouth Kostro...
  15. Curly McCurdled
  16. My Good Friday Procedure
  17. What is it with women...?
  18. The Spanx
  19. Pop-Ups
  20. 'Nere Do Wells

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