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Patrick A Granfors

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  Selective Reading Disorder
by Patrick A Granfors
Friday, November 19, 2010
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Patrick A Granfors
•  Queen of Broken Hearts
•  Somebody Blinked
•  Drink About It
•  Bend
•  Dominos
           >> View all 528

I don't think I'm alone

Selective Reading Disorder

A condition I seem to have acquired

It’s not listed in medical journals

Doctor’s reading is not required


The symptoms here I cannot deny

Trying to digest Congressional articles

The words make me steam and ultimately scream

As from my bastion I blast Senatorial farticles


I tried taking a TUM to soothe my poor bum

Some Di-gel to relieve my overstressed moon

Like a natural gas field their smug looks make me yield

Enough volume to fill a hot air balloon


I avoid reading their crap for that reason

I note also they will soon be resurgent

In the mean time I’m saving a fortune

In underwear bleach and detergent


Considering the butt crack or political hack

The line between the two has been thinned

Right cheek or left, liberal or not

It’s the center that gets most of the wind


So for now I will stick to the funnies

And limit my Sunday syllables to three

My Selective Reading Disorder

Will not get the better of me



Copyright 2010 Patrick Granfors



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Reviewed by E T Waldron 11/19/2010
Patrick,I came back and you haven't changed, still doing what your
a pro at, these gems,even when the subject stinks,your writing is top brand perfume!;-)
Reviewed by JASMIN HORST SEILER 11/19/2010
Now look here Patrick, you passed whatever it is on, and caused a great stink, cheeky stuff or not, try to use the pot, use that paper for something other than the eyes, like you said it's all a bunch of lies, anyway, test it first on Mildred, or Eileen, before you vent your speen ha, I think she's got her eyes fixed now, she might, I can't, read that fine print. Bless ya! Jasmin Horst
Reviewed by Mark Lichterman 11/19/2010
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! So you no longer watch KNBC or Fox News.
Reviewed by Ed Matlack 11/19/2010
You are the comical leader here at AD anymore as my humorous seems to have taken a powder...this one was especially funny...e
Reviewed by Christine Tsen 11/19/2010
Caustically whimsical, so funny!!!
Do you know you have me analyzing the art work my dog makes out of his daily excretions?
Reviewed by TONY NERONE 11/19/2010
Excellent writing.

Reviewed by Paul Berube 11/19/2010
Very well said, Patrick.
Reviewed by Chip Bergeron 11/19/2010

Chip Bergeron
Reviewed by Sage Sweetwater 11/19/2010
It's better than dyslexia! At least you're not shitting backwards, dude! Politically correct Angel Soft or White Cloud, be a two-ply label reader. How much crap can we really take? Selective reading keeps us regular...

Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan 11/19/2010
clever but oh so true
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