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I am

A woman

with a full heart

Hidden somewhere

In an empty room ...



I wonder

If love is a tale made for children --

A granting of sweet dreams in their innocence --

A honey coating to help their throats

Choke down the bitter draught ...



I hear

A voice that whispers warnings, half-formed,

Bodiless as hope, until I swear I cannot draw

another breath unless this specter is unmasked,

His lies mangled beneath my righteous stride



I see

A woman,

Proud, uncompromising,

Sheer as air -- less, even, than the tears

That fall in desolation about her weary feet



I want

A measure of quietude, a certain silence,

The echo of alone which heals me of dreaming,

The nothing, that stills the wanting,

The numb, the cold that laughs at pain



I am

A woman, hidden ...

I pretend That I can live forever -- that Time

Has no nuisance but that which I afford Him --

And so, I can wait, I can be happy tomorrow



I feel

Too much, too deeply to be direction less,

Too real for imagining, and yet the familiar eyes

Hold nothing of recognition -- only my reflection --

A meeting of shadows in sunlit glass



I touch ...

The downy wings of hope, in wonder,

In reverence, in need, in hunger;

alas, it burns my fingers as a flame,

A sacrilege, self-defined ...



I worry ...

That I am alone

That in my longing

I have forsaken all -- but oh, what reward,

What smile divine should light the path to freedom



I cry ...

For having too much, for fear of bursting,

and then, when by the pouring of my soul

I lie, a vessel emptied, I cry again

for what was had, and lost



I am A woman, empty ...

I understand That life is what you make it,

That sometimes, the coat of many colors

That marks your triumphs brightly,

Blends only to loneliest of Grey ...



I say

that we are made by life, shaped,

Broken, perhaps -- unmade and voided --

But always, the core of us remains, waiting

with only faith, with trust, to be reborn



I dream

of bluest waters, reaching

with unnatural hands toward the faded sky,

Of dolphins that wander in seas without limits,

carrying me water-breathing past corals and clouds ...



I try ...

To lead by example, knowing

that merely the telling holds no power;

A gift of giving is merely a day, while

A gift of knowing spans forever



I hope ...

That my darkness holds you gently,

That pain is halved by sharing, that feeling

Wields nothing past the words it summons,

Except that it touch you with only healing ...



I am

A woman

with a full heart

Hidden somewhere

In an empty room ...