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Regis Auffray

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Award-winning finalist 2010 Indie Excellence Awards for horror fiction. Award winning finalist 2010 Independent Publishers Book Awards (IPPY) for horror fiction...  
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Books by Regis Auffray
Limericks XXXIII
by Regis Auffray
Friday, July 20, 2012
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Regis Auffray
•  Ostrich Ride and other Tales
•  Miss Understood
•  Petrichor
•  Limericks XXXVII
•  My Hands
           >> View all 359

More limerick "fun" from me...

It Takes All Kinds

Hurley is an eccentric cat,
Actually he's a very spoiled brat.
Cherie takes care of him,
Sees to his every whim,
She even lets him sleep under her hat.

There once was a fellow named Kloos.
Who rode into town on a moose.
People stopped to stare,
At the bizarre pair,
While Kloos yelled, “Giddy up, Pamplemousse!”

A fellow I know named Koslowsky,
Somehow misplaced his house key.
Locked out in the cold,
He became quite bold,
And smashed through the door with his Suzuki.

There once was a fellow named Mike,
Who was scared of riding his bike.
Afraid of falling,
He kept on calling,
For his mom to bring him his trike.

There once was a lady from Norway,
Who had a sign in her doorway:
“Do not be hampered;
Come and be pampered;
I can do anything your way!”

I once met a gal named Mandy,
At most things she was quite handy.
But in matters of love,
When push came to shove,
She was as handy as candy is dandy.

There once was a man of great means,
He always had cash in his jeans.
But he was boring,
And when not snoring,
He most likely was counting his beans.

There once was a lady from Prague,
Who really wanted to play tag.
The more I resisted,
The more she insisted,
So whenever she’d zig I would zag.

A lady from New York named Lena,
Is not to be confused with Laina.
She’s physically small,
But spiritually tall,
She’s much more powerful than Xena.

There once was a fellow named Kloos,
He had a favourite goose.
He pampered her daily,
As he sang to her gaily,
He fed her the finest couscous.

© Copyright 2012 Regis Auffray


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Reviewed by Rozzy Diouf 11/29/2013
Thanks! Oh thanks! Limericks...never disappointing!
Reviewed by c lea harris 12/22/2012
alrightly then,,,this one I am glad I did not miss reading.
Thank you for giving me a heads up in the recent poem, I completly missed it,
Reviewed by Paddy Bostock 10/21/2012
Regis, I'd so love to comment but all the limericks I know are filthy and would land me in jail if ever shared one on social media. Cats don't have that problem.

Ho hum.


Reviewed by Kathleen McDonald 9/24/2012
Very cool Limericks
Reviewed by Mary Grace Patterson 9/20/2012
I love your limericks. They always brighten my day....M
Reviewed by Lena Kovadlo 9/17/2012
For the life of me I can't seem to enjoy limericks... Not yours in particular. Just generally speaking... I guess mainly because of the flow. It seems off for me and that throws me off... You know how I am about flow... It has to be perfect.

Oh and I see that in this limerick you actually wrote about me. Thanks. I am not small though lol.
Reviewed by C. McGovern-Bowen 9/10/2012
such a charmer, regis!
be well,
Reviewed by Abdi-Noor Mohamed (Eagle Of Hope) 9/6/2012
I cannot imagine how you construct these fantastic verses with far reaching humor laced with wisdom such as this...

I once met a gal named Mandy,
At most things she was quite handy.
But in matters of love,
When push came to shove,
She was as handy as candy is dandy.

Great job my friend. I Always enjoy reading your writes
Reviewed by Ken Colonsay 9/2/2012
Feline skill of the master poet, Regis!

I saw a white recently in a Beijing park. It had one blue eye and one green eye. I thought it might be a Bond villain cat but it was too cute for that. :-)
Reviewed by Barbara Henry 8/17/2012
Delightful! Regis- You do these better than anyone I know.
Continued success~
Barbara J. Henry
Reviewed by Janet Caldwell 8/14/2012
Love it my friend....xoxoxo
Reviewed by Darrell and Kathy Adams 8/11/2012
How fun was that?! Regis, you are so multi-dimensional and this was a delight. Thank you for your offering. Be well, Kathy
Reviewed by La Belle Rouge Poetess Of The Heart 8/3/2012
I always love these Regis and get a good laugh for the day.

there once was a poet named "Reg"
writing with great prestige
his verse made me smile
so I read quite a while
Reg was a poet to please
Reviewed by Christine Tsen 8/2/2012
Irresistibly creative! You do these so well :)
Reviewed by Jon Willey 7/31/2012
Regis, it has been quite a while since you last enlightened and amused us with your limericks - it is good to see you are creating them again - I wish you love and peace my friend - Jon Michael
Reviewed by JMS Bell 7/29/2012
Reviewed by Lori Moore 7/28/2012
I owe you several laughs.
Reviewed by Mary Ann Biddinger 7/26/2012
Quite the cat this Hurley. Love the giggles in these
comical verses.

Lady Mary Ann
Reviewed by John Domino 7/25/2012
Cat's are cool pets.
Pet poems are great.
This poem is special because it's got cat persona.
Cat's are hard to describe but you done better than most.
Cat's give us so much joy as your poem suggest.

God Bless!
Reviewed by Z McClure 7/23/2012
tHIS one tickled me Regis! Thanks for fun poem

Reviewed by richard cederberg 7/22/2012
A goose named Kloos who ate Moroccan? Funny stuff Regis.
Reviewed by Kate Clifford 7/21/2012
I like this style of writing,I'll have to try it sometime. The one I loved the most was.....I once met a gal named Mandy
Reviewed by Vivian Dawson 7/21/2012
Listen for the giggles and outright laughter
*Regis* and I love couscous too...

Lady Vivian
Reviewed by Muhammad Al Mahdi 7/21/2012
-:) Grand, like the couscous part especially, and the cat and the girls:)
Reviewed by Mamta Sharma 7/21/2012
A delightful limerick... :D Thanks for sharing.
Have a wonderful day,
Mamta Sharma
Reviewed by Sherry Heim 7/21/2012
Cute, Regis. As always, very entertaining.
Take care,
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 7/21/2012
These are great, mon mai! Thanks for sharing; c'est bien!

(((HUGS))) et amour, ton ami dans Texas, Karen Lynn. :D
Reviewed by Laura Fall 7/21/2012
Absolutely Delightfully written poetry as always Laura
Reviewed by Jane Noponen Perinacci 7/20/2012
Oh, how I love reading these limericks of yours! Keep 'em coming!

Love ya!

Reviewed by Micki Peluso 7/20/2012
I've missed your limericks!! It's been a while and I need them to keep me smiling:) Thgis one is particularly fumnny and sweet!!

Fondly. Micki
Reviewed by neerja gandhi 7/20/2012
Beautiful.....great laughs...candy is dandy but liquor is quicker says Ogden Nash :)
Wonderful... I had a dog named cherry, she used to do lovely tricks and make us laugh....sadly, no more :(
Best wishes...neerja:)
Reviewed by Lily of Lough Neagh C. Dennis-Woosley 7/20/2012
This was fantastic! Wonderful collection and well written, thank you for my smiles tonight :)

Love and Light
Reviewed by Paul Berube 7/20/2012
lol Great piece of work, my friend.
Reviewed by Budd Nelson 7/20/2012
a wonderful collection of limericks
Reviewed by Ed Matlack 7/20/2012
There once was a fellow named Rick,
Who wrote many a scattered limerick,
He wrote them on a daily basis,
Of them he never knew which to pick,
Though he found he wrote his best while relaxing at an oasis...

There is a fellow name of Regis,
He writes many a poem about the kiss,
He also writes many a limerick,
And never have I seen anything that he wrote to of the mark miss...

Reviewed by T Jett (Reader) 7/20/2012
Ah Regis, such a delightful read to start my morning. Wonderully written as always ...
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 7/20/2012
As usual, very entertaining and creative. Some are downright cheesy.

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton 7/20/2012
Great limericks, Regis!
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila 7/20/2012
giggle....loved them all but I was particularly partial to the Lady from Prague...giggle....have a great weekend, my friend!

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