Join | Login 

     Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!

Signed Bookstore | Authors | eBooks | Books | Stories | Articles | Poetry | Blogs | News | Events | Reviews | Videos | Success | Gold Members | Testimonials

Featured Authors: richard cederberg, iBryan Koepke, iCheri Dohnal, iLori Maynard, iNancy Jardine, iSophie Davis, iSara Coslett, i
  Home > Pets/Pet Care > Poetry
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Mr. Ed

· Become a Fan
  Notify me of new titles
  added by this author.

· 1,812 titles
· 27,231 Reviews
· Share with Friends!
· Save to My Library
Member Since: Apr, 2003

   My Blog
   Success Story
   Contact Author
   Read Reviews

· My Dog Is My Hero

· Where The Redwing Sings

· Through Katrina's Eyes, Poems from an Animal Rescuer's Soul

· Mystery of Madera Canyon

· Cemetery Island

· Gold River Canyon

· Curious Creatures - Wondrous Waifs, My Life with Animals

Short Stories
· The Easter Skunk

· The Dog At The Drive-Thru Window

· Home For The Holidays

· Two Bonded Street Orphans, In From The Cold

· A Survivor's Tale

· Pigs, Turtles, and Bugs!

· Gentle Cemetery Dog Finally Safe

· Freezing, Starving, and Scared

· A Home For The Holidays

· The Dog On The Tracks

· I Am a Dog, Not a Thing

· Ghost Dog Rescued From Hot Dog Stand

· February is 'National Spay/Neuter Awareness' Month

· The 2014 Home 4 The Holidays Campaign

· Saving Our Canine Vets, This Veterans Day

· November is 'Adopt-A-Senior-Pet' Month

· National Pit Bull Awareness Day

· Keep Your Pets Safe This Halloween

· October is 'Adopt-A-Dog' Month

· Pet Theft Is On The Rise

· Just Nature

· It's Poppy Time Once More

· Please Don't Worry So Much, H.P.

· Meatloaf Matlack

· A Walk With Dogs

· Earth Day Blues

· What Have We Become

· The Victims of Our Cruelty

· The Shredding Machine

· Happy Easter From Valentino

         More poetry...
· Chicken Soup for the Soul: Loving Our Dogs

· The Daily Mews

· Where The Redwing Sings

· Another Review For Curious Creatures-Wondrous Waifs

· Recipient of the 2006 Merial Human-Animal Bond Award

· International Writing Award

· My Animal Book Wins an Award

Mr. Ed, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

  The Cussing Cockatoo Case
by Mr. Ed
Saturday, September 08, 2012
Rated "G" by the Author.

Share   Print   Save Become a Fan

Recent poems by Mr. Ed
•  Just Nature
•  It's Poppy Time Once More
•  Please Don't Worry So Much, H.P.
•  Meatloaf Matlack
•  A Walk With Dogs
           >> View all 1,518



-And Some Still Insist That We’re More Intelligent Than Animals-


Music: Bad To The Bone


Many of my neighbors cuss and curse

But they are protected by ‘Free Speech’

Poor Willy The Cockatoo is not protected

And he’s been dragged into court this week


He has been cited under an ‘Animal Noise Ordinance’

Since he likes to shout expletives at the folks next door

I don’t think that it’s his fault he was taught nasty words

Especially offensive to his neighbors are words like ‘’


You see his owner used to be married to the guy next door

But he decided to leave his wife, and hook up with another

So Willy’s owner taught him many words not taught in school

Words that many children hear spouted by fathers and mothers


I wonder if poor Willy would have been in violation of this ordinance

If he had been taught to shout things like: “Good Morning, Neighbor!

My, You Look Lovely In That Fabulous New Dress Of Yours Today,

I Hope You Have A Good Day At Work, And I’ll Talk To You Later!”


And today, I am considering starting a ‘Free Speech For Willy’ Campaign

Like all of us, he’s a product of his environment, and what he hears everyday

I’m also now considering getting a few Cockatoos like good old Willy myself

My dogs refuse to shout expletives at my nasty neighbors, no matter what I say


Many of my neighbors cuss and curse,

But they are protected by Free Speech;

Poor Willy The Cockatoo is not protected,

And he’s been dragged into court this week.


-And I Sure Hope He Doesn’t Swear At The Judge-



©2012, Animal Rights Advocate Mr. Ed








Want to review or comment on this poem?
Click here to login!

Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!

Reviewed by Christine Alwin 9/10/2012
....just as kids say what they hear, darn grown-ups need to grow up!
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila 9/10/2012
Hahaha! I've heard more than one swearing bird in my lifetime...and it's exactly as you say...they're a product of their environment...

Reviewed by John Flanagan 9/9/2012
You go Willy! swear all you like at those
'wh.res'...have i got that right?
an Animal Noise Ordinance? ah yes, but
pity there isn't one for public officials
and such..
Ed, give Willy my best wishes

Reviewed by Laura Fall 9/8/2012
A great photo to along with this enjoyable read Laura
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 9/8/2012
Hysterical! XD

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Texas, Karen Lynn. :D
Reviewed by Vivian Dawson 9/8/2012
Amusing and Delightful
that bad boy "Willy"
*Mr Ed* thoroughly
enjoyed this one!

Lady Vivian
Reviewed by Keith Rowley 9/8/2012
Reviewed by Christine Tsen 9/8/2012
Irresistible! Ooh I hope he let's it all out!
Reviewed by Joy Hale 9/8/2012
Wonderfully funny! I wish I had a cockatoo to use on
one of my neighbors. No cussing, just "Clean up your yard." and "tell your kids to not have such loud and boisterous parties until the wee hours of the morning while you are both gone." A little comic relief is good for all of us!

Joy L. Hale

Joy L. Hale
Reviewed by Mary Ann Biddinger 9/8/2012
Mr. Ed ~ Hilarious that this Cockatoo cusses like a drunken sailor !!
Willie has animal rights. Hope all goes well !!

Lady Mary Ann
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 9/8/2012
I'll swear to that! Since when is the word, “Where,” obscene? All the cockatoos I know are just happy to be able to mimic humans and speak. For that they get tasty treats and are very sure they know exactly what they are saying. That's why your poem is so poignant, Especially when you described the surrounding circumstances.

You can Cockatoo all you want, but don't cock it around me! ;-)

Reviewed by JASMIN HORST SEILER 9/8/2012
Who're you calling a bird brain, you, fn, expletive ha, I still don't know how to make lovely noise like yours, or write such witty poetry, by the way, I'll sign your petition too, it's really the neighbours who should be fined, for aggrevating the bird, ha.
Bless ya!
Reviewed by Lily of Lough Neagh C. Dennis-Woosley 9/8/2012
I have to laugh, it is not the bird's fault
he was taught expletives! Definitely a product
of his environment, the owner of Willie needs
to be fined. (Of course he will have to pay
the fine lol..., new language training should
be in short order)

Love and Light
Reviewed by D. Vegas 9/8/2012
Poor Willie, it is not his fault...

Reviewed by D Johnson 9/8/2012
Way to go Ed, I'd call the campaign 'Free Willy 2.0'
Reviewed by Odin Roark 9/8/2012
The whole idea of free speech is treated with charm and humor in this departure from your often dog-based writings. Enjoyable read. Now teaching expletives in a remote foreign language would freak out the best of them, eh?
Reviewed by Ruan Mills Burke 9/8/2012
Poor old Willy!
My dogs do shout expletives at the neighbours - just not in English - Maybe that's a good thing. lol

Books by
Mr. Ed

Where The Redwing Sings

Buy Options
Signed copy!
Amazon, Barnes & Noble, more..

My Dog Is My Hero

Buy Options
Amazon, Barnes & Noble, more..

Curious Creatures - Wondrous Waifs, My Life with Animals

Buy Options
Signed copy!
Amazon, Barnes & Noble, more..

Through Katrina's Eyes, Poems from an Animal Rescuer's Soul

Buy Options
Signed copy!
Amazon, Barnes & Noble, more..

Cemetery Island

Buy Options
Signed copy!
Amazon, Barnes & Noble, more..

Gold River Canyon

Buy Options
Signed copy!
Amazon, Barnes & Noble, more..

Mystery of Madera Canyon

Buy Options
Signed copy!
Amazon, more..

(Pets/Pet Care)
  1. De-Stress with a Pet
  2. End of Year Ponderings
  3. We Are Their Voice
  4. The Victims of Our Cruelty
  5. Frozen Tears
  6. National Feral Cat Day
  7. National Dog Day
  8. Over Five Thousand A Day Are Dying
  9. My girlfriend Miss Onnie...
  10. Guardian Angels
  11. A Going Home Surprise
  12. Our dog Rufuz...
  13. Their Love and Loyalty Deserve Ours
  14. If Only Man Was Dog's Best Friend
  15. My Sammy-boy Makes Me Smile
  16. Unjustly Vilified
  17. Another Innocent Soul Out In The Cold And
  18. Faith Saves Grace
  19. Walkin' The Dog
  20. Nine Years Ago

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.