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Sara Coslett

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Short Stories
· To "Mom's" Family -- With Love

· Road Warrior Cries the Blues

· Life's Comedy - Or How Not to Catch a Snake

· Ruff Work

· Plagiarism in an Online Community

· I'm Not All Liberal

· How Many Terrorists Does it Take...

· A Letter to Mankind

· Tax Cuts - A Simple Lesson In Economics

· What Is An American?

· A Line in the Sand

· Unfunny God

· Standing By

· To love . . .

· Give Me Strength

· No Place Like Love

· Climbing Silence Hill

· The Wolfy Pack

· Circling the Work Wagon

· Advance -fee Fraud aka Nigerian Letter Scam

· The Obama Generation

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  Help Wanted
by Sara Coslett
Thursday, September 04, 2003

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Recent poems by Sara Coslett
•  Unfunny God
•  Terminating Failure
•  desire you
•  Standing By
•  To love . . .
           >> View all 671

It is so much easier not to wallow in pain
When your life is filled with work, work and more work.
So here you are too busy to really get depressed.
Even though it is 90 degrees outside with 110% humidity
And you are standing in the middle of the convention floor.
All the doors in the hall are wide open
Because it is setup day and they are moving crates in and out.
Being a busy little bee you are working your tail off.
Only it is so damn hot and humid that whatever you are not working off
You are sweating off.
At least the management has provided free cold bottled water.
Too bad the opening is too small for you to climb into it for a nice relaxing swim.
So you just keep drinking and sweating
Occasionally wondering, Why am I here
Why am I covered in dirt?
Why am I killing myself?
Why cant I hire someone to do the grunt work for me?
Finally after about 8 hours of sweating
You get in your car thinking your day if finally over.
Only to remember that you just drove 650 miles
From Orlando to New Orleans through a swarm of a billion love bugs,
Whose splattered guts are at this very moment eating away the paint
On your big beautiful black SUV.
Time to drive on over to the Pep Boys you saw about 10 miles out of town.
Your husband spots a spray bottle of lovebug cleaner on the bottom shelf.
The instructions on the bottle tell you to wash the car first.
Great now you have to find a car wash in a strange town.
First gas station you come to has one of those drive through quickie kinds
And for the first time all day, you are feeling lucky.
$7.00 later you come out of the tunnel,
You look at your car and damn it!
There are still hundreds of bugs splattered all over your bumper and hood.
So you start squirting cleaner and rubbing your car
While standing in gas station parking lot off I-10
In 90-degree heat and 110% humidity
Hopping the battery acid like juice isnt already eating away your paint job.
After about 10 minutes of spraying and scrubbing
Your husband who is sitting in the front passenger seat starts to get impatient
And he screams out at you, come on lets go.
You reply, No, not until I get all this crap off the car.
Looking up you see him scowling at you and you scream back
You know, you could come out here and help.
And then you remember why you hate being married to this man
Who is sitting down in the car watching you work,
Complaining HE is tired.

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Reviewed by serenety L 9/17/2003
Well, it always makes men tired when they have to watch their wifes working. Same over here.
Enjoyed this one.
Reviewed by *********** ********** (Reader) 9/7/2003
Jesus Sara!! I would have told him to clean his own %$^&*#. bugs off :|

Great emotion packed write.....ty, Dani
Reviewed by Amor Sabor 9/6/2003
I do not know where they grow those type of husbands but Please do not send them here. Great write on this.
Reviewed by Adam Walsvik (Reader) 9/5/2003
I took every one of those 'you's seriously(not too seriously). I started thinking how hard those people , for instance, who provide my electricity work, then put myself in their shoes. Thanks. I guess I needed that.

Reviewed by Leland Waldrip 9/5/2003
Won't get into your marital situation, Sara, but the love bugs could inspire a nice little poem. Running through east Texas at about seventy and hit a swarm of the little coupled up grease balls. They were truly eff'n bugs. Had to emergency stop and scrape the windshield, wipe with towel after towel. Finally got underway again. Good luck with everything.
Best regards,
Reviewed by J. Murphy 9/5/2003
Like the matter-of-factness of this piece. I totally know about the 90 degree, 110% humitity, and trying to scrape off love bugs thing (I lived in Alabama at one point in my life) and believe me I'm glad I'm in California! Your husband needs a clue but who am I to say. J.
Reviewed by Patricia Gomes 9/5/2003
They don't call you Super Girl for nuthin' ya know.

Ah men - can't live with 'em, can't shoot em.
Reviewed by Lady Peg (Reader) 9/5/2003
I work but right now it is short days friday
off in 3 1/2 hours haha... that is crazy.. This is a very good write you have done.
Lady peg
Reviewed by Handsum Hart 9/5/2003
Men, aren't we adorable, in a strange way?
Don't let the bugs, bug you Sara, I enjoyed this very much as it made me grin. peace.
Reviewed by Ted Sheridan (Reader) 9/5/2003
Word for the wise, a product called "The Bom" Professor Amos at HSN, coat your car, windows anything with this and they will not stick to it. Ha, make hubby do it. Sounds like he trained you.
Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader) 9/5/2003
Just kill the bastard then.
Reviewed by Pamela Kimmell 9/5/2003
Boy does THIS scenario sound familiar - only in MY version as Tinka mentions, there's a beer in "his" hand. You certainly captured the feeling of the day in general, and this incident specifically and of course the frustration of the entire experience! Well done.
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 9/4/2003
hehehehe...why didn't you feed him some of those!! or spray him with the cleaner...hope he cleaned up those sunflower shells...if not>>>>KILL HIM < < < <

I know the feeling Sara!!

Didn't he had a beer in the hand ?

Well mine would have been poooped by that time!
Now you have to tell me What kind of car a SUV that short for some fancy car...I know that Vauxhall in England and Opel in South Africa are the same car...but with different names!!

Take care my friend...and goodluck with the bussiness!!

love Tinka
Reviewed by jude forese 9/4/2003
it is evident that he really has bugged you...

outstanding dissertation of life on the
Reviewed by Vicky Jeter 9/4/2003
Hope there are also those times when you
recall why you decided to marry him.
Can you show him this?
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