The Love, Tiredness and Sadness I Feel
by Rhonda Marie Baumgardner
Monday, September 22, 2003
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I have felt a love so strong,but I made a mistake
and did something wrong.
I didn't know he cared so much,
but I now know that I hurt him, I
put my hand on his soft face and felt his warm tears.
It broke my heart into a thousand little pieces.
I was so confused on how he felt for me,
If only I was able to see how true
his feelings were for me.
I had never felt so lonely and scared,
such a deep loss, I didn't think
it something my heart could bare.
I just wanted to lay down and cry, I
really felt as if I would die.
I'd rather of lost him that way
than my own stupid game plays.
I didn't mean to hurt him,
all I ever wanted to do was love him.
I started to feel so tired,
in body and soul,
so tired of the pain
and tired of being alone.
When he wanted me to go away,
it hurt more than I could ever say.
The loss felt worse than anything ever before.
He left me standing there,
tears falling from my eyes when
he walked out my door.
I had thought my dreams for this life
so simple, just wanted to ride a Harley
on endless road trips,
letting my hair fly with the wind.
What a child I was,
I just didn't realize.
When it was to late was when I knew,
all I really needed was love,
a home and to never be alone.
I thought that all he needed was time
to understand, that it all seemed
so out of my hands.
All I could think of for a long time was him.
The tears wouldn't stop flowing
and the feelings kept growing.
Loving him was the best thing I ever did.
I feel like I am going down a long dark hall
I guess there is no end to it all.
My heart cries with the love,
tiredness and sadness I feel,
waiting for the day I will be able to let go.