Join Free! | Login    
Happy 4th of July!
   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!


Featured Authors:  Paul Ulasien, iRobert Campbell, iLloydene Hill, iDavid Arthur Walters, iRichard Orey, iCatriona King, iTuchy (Carl) Palmieri, i

  Home > Humor > Poetry
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Ed Matlack

· + Follow Me
· Contact Me
· Poetry
· Stories
· Blog
· Messages
· 5,730 Titles
· 43,542 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
Member Since: Aug, 2003

Ed Matlack, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.

Featured Book
Love On A Rotten Day
by Hazel Dixon-Cooper

What's LOVE got to do with it? Discover the not-so-romantic style of your favorite sign. Find out who's the cheater, manipulator, bully, brat, nutcase, or nympho.  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members

Never Should I Eat McDonalds...
by Ed Matlack

Share   Print  Save   Follow
Recent poems by Ed Matlack
•  The pitfualls of self-help books...
•  Him...
•  The less I have, the more I have...
•  Be...
•  Zen & the Art of Reading...
           >> View all 5,705

Shouldn't eat late, or I take the chance of losing my snack in a most horrendous way...

Never Should I Eat McDonalds…


I know better, believe me,

But sometimes I get a craving,

for quarter pounders so yummy…


a bad day was had Monday,

felt especially guilty,

cause Rufuz was left for long hours,

without a potty break & no food,

but he just loved to see me, no end,

when I got home he was not offended,

or so it seemed as he slept with me,

till the mcdonalds came back up,

possibly splattering him with my upchuck…


He jumped out of the bed,

ran away, to his own spot,

sorry Rufuz for I cannot seem to eat,

raw onions, pickles & like that, when I am beat.


I just thought for a change,

I might make it thru the night,

without getting sick, as I took my pill,

and slept with my head on an uphill,

but still I lost my snack,

but better that,

than keeping it in,

making me sick all night,

I can’t take that blight…


oh and goodnight…    (ed) 


Want to review or comment on this poem?
Click here to login!

Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!

Reviewed by J. Allen Wilson
Oh Ed, we always talk about how vivid the poetry is in the den...but I must tell you...this was a bit to vivid...LOL
Reviewed by P. Michaels
Ed, those onions do it everytime, but it's so hard to stay away from them. Hope you are feeling better, and Rufuz has forgiven you.
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner

(((HUGS))) and hope you're feeling better soon...i don't like mcdonald's either (except for their strawberry shakes--YUMMY)...i've had food poisoning before, NOT fun

and poor rufuz :(

a sick poem from a sick friend--but so damn funny ROTFLM*O--not 'cause you're sick, the way you wrote it...if you can laugh about it, you're ahead of the game

(((((HUGS))))) and love,

karla. :(
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
oh, dear...i am sorry! but i LOVE mcdonald's! but I may NOt eat any, thanks to YOU! I hope Rufuz gets over his mad for your puckin' on him (poor baby; reminds me of the time I got sick on Karla the day after she got ME with her was NOT fun! But I don't want to make you sicker than you already are, so I think I'll just shut the hell up for now...LOL Still, it WAS *NASTY*!)

(((HUGS))) and much love, your (nauseated) Tx. friend, Karen Lynn. :P
Reviewed by Floria Kelderhouse (Reader)
Hey Ed...I'm drinking my coffee...Do you mind? hahahahahah....just pulling your leg...I got deathly ill last year after eating one of their burgers...the dr thought it was food poisoning...but we never did find out...I was sick for 14 days...hope your better....floria
Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Pls tell me you didn't really upchuck on poor Rufuz. He'll be traumatized for life now. Poor little fella.
Reviewed by Ch'erie de Perrot
That will teach you for leaving poor Rufuz alone, and busting for a pee for hours ROFLMBO, it must be a dog thing, Duchess was locked out last night, and so this morning when I realized, ( havent been well last couple days ) anyhow she came in and shat in the toilet, on the floor of course!!!! There's a message in there somewhere i just know it.

Reviewed by Kate Clifford
My snack was sitting pretty good until I read this! :-)
Popular Poetry (Humor)
  1.  Poet Up a Tree
  2.  OMG, it's freakin' HOT...
  3.  Halloween is Coming!
  5.  The Thrill is Gone
  6.  Kostro's always pickin' on me...AGAIN
  7.  Procrastination
  8.  Mushmouth Kostro...
  9.  Hello, I'm Mister ED...
  10.  Over internet-ed...

It's Too Late to Leave Early, An Aerospace Fable by William Walling

A satirical spoof of the American aerospace industry...  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.