There were times when he just plain...got on her nerves! Wherever she went, seems he'd always show up. Like that time a couple of weeks ago when she and her co-workers decided to get together on a Friday evening after work. Boy, was she having a good time! There was food, groovy music and she had a joint in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. She was just about to do a barefoot solo to one of her favorite songs, when out of the blue...there he was...standing in the doorway with that...that...look. It wasn't condescending or judgmental...it was...oh! She didn't know what it was, but it irked her to no end. She wound up stalking out with everybody looking at her like she had lost her mind....and...and it had to stop!

She wanted to end the relationship, but for some reason she couldn't. She needed him...deep down inside, she knew she did...it was scary. And that wasn't the only thing that was bothering her...she was becoming aware of something else; she was hurting him....that was it! That was the look in his eyes...a look of hurt...of disappointment and though she acted like she didn't...she understood why.  He had proved himself to her time and time again; whatever she did, he always forgave...always gave her another chance. He tolerated her spurts of anger and total disrespect, not because he had to or was suppose to but, because....he loved her.

There was no question in her mind that he irked her to no end, but now she was feeling annoyed with herself because she had to admit that she was in fact...growing tired. Tired of taking advantage and she found it hard to continue to ignore how much he had sacrificed for her and... what a good friend he was to her. Daily, she received from him and took...never giving anything in return except maybe, a bland 'thank you' every now and then.

But the thing that really was bothering her lately...the thing that she was trying desperately, but futily to deny...was the guilt. Guilt was beginning to rise up inside of her more and more and she could no longer deny her feelings; he did not deserve the way she treated him. He hadn't done anything to warrant the hurt she inflicted upon him. She enjoyed the fruits of his labor and his bountiful provisions but then she selfishly expected him to take her shallow treatment and her worldly behavior because...he was 'fashioned'  to do so...'fashioned' to take it...to expect it. When in fact, he wasn't...it pained him.

So....she considered...she would at least 'try' to appreciate him more. She would try to treat him as well as she treated any of her other 'friends'. One didn't deliberately hurt a friend, one didn't outlandishly use a friend. Even though one knew they could and would probably get away with it...they didn't, because they 'valued' the friendship. But how...she wondered? He had everything ...really. And anyway, it seemed all he wanted was her. All he desired was for her to try and love him in return.

She took it slow...one day at a time...change was not going to come over night. The first step was to acknowledge that she had treated him wrong. She asked him to forgive her for all the times she purposely hurt him. She admitted to him that she needed him....for the rest of her life...she needed him! She promised that she would try to never again 'deliberately' hurt him. She might 'err' being human, but never again would she blatantly and unshamelessly stomp on his sacrifice...his love.  

It was little by little...moment by moment...hour by hour...that she came to know him better. She became more 'aware' of him. The attention she once scorned, was now relished.  His constant presence was expected...wanted...enjoyed. They continued to grow closer and closer and she soon found herself  going out of her way to do things that pleased and delighted him. But the ultimate joy that she discovered was something so wonderful...something that pleased them both immensely. She didn't know when or even exactly how it had happened but...she had fallen in love with him! His name....?  Jesus.