"Well To Me, it was a crime of my innocence"
Today was a beautiful clear morning, I sat in my enclosed garden once again
Sipping delicious herbal tea, enjoying the scenic background of my yard over looking
the wild animal and bird sanctuary wetlands, when undesired thoughts invaded my mind
Of a moment lost in time, I had suppressed for many years, when I was about seven or eight years old.
My mother dispatched my little sister and I, to a local grocery store owned by an old Italian woman in her mid 60‘s for some bread and milk, a sweet tweedy pie looking granny named Louisa, we thought her to be a gentle woman who always treated the kids with penny candy treats.
On my way to the store, I found a woman’s watch on the sidewalk in front of my house
I place it in my pocket, while Louisa was taking my sister’s order I took the watch out
of my pocket to inspect it Louisa saw me, Mustering the sweetest voice imaginable asking me “what was that I had in my hands”?
As I began to show her, face change to that of Mr. Hide, snatching it from my grasp
Screaming at me, what are you doing with this you little spic bastard, where did you steal this from, with the same breath yelling for her daughter who was in the rear of the store, she appeared immediately still wearing her high school cheer leader’s outfit, she was
beautiful about sixteen and towered over me.
Louisa gave her the watch saying this little spic had your watch, baffled she looked at the old witch, exclaiming “My watch”?, so obvious even I as a kid knew it wasn’t hers, yes your watch, he said he found it on the side walk on the way here, the beautiful cheer leader, realizing the unfolding larceny at hand, placed the watch around the loveliness of her wrist, disappearing back into the rear of the store.
Leaving me standing there in the middle of the floor, people staring at me, embarrassed and with a tear on the edge of my innocence, flabbergasted wondering what had just occurred, how could I had been accused of stealing and why did they take away the watch I had found.
Yes I did say she was in her mid 60’s, back then when I was just a child of seven or eight,
Now I am in my mid 60’s and still I am unable to find it within my heart to ever forgive that old bitch, all I can say is that I hope she is still burning in the hell she made for herself along the way.
By: William Bonilla
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|Reviewed by Carmen Montoya
|Thank you for sharing such an intimate and vividly scarring childhood memory. I too can recall some ugly memories growing up but I have learned to make peace with them through the grace of my Lord Jesus Christ. The self respect, dignity and self love that has resulted through this divine grace and guidance has allowed victory over these trials and tribulations.
At the end of the day, I ask myself was that person's shortcomings/narrowness of mind/unloving actions/personal insecurity/twisted upbringing/emptiness/satanic influence etc.. worth my present and future peace of mind and heart condition that channels God's love and strength? Answer:NO! So I pray, forgive and give it to God. On the day of judgement, we will all give an account so better to keep the slate clean. God bless you today and always..Thank you again.
|Reviewed by The Poetess
|Oh! I can feel your pain as it triggers my own. I had two sisters who treated me like that. My innocence cried more times than not. But they must have harbored more pain than I, to have behaved with such viciousness, which they harbor still. Sometimes I feel sorry for them and think I have forgiven them. But sometimes my pain resurfaces and I feel angry again. I think it is extremely hard to completely forgive when the abuser has not yet grown into remorse.|
|Reviewed by Margo Lumley
|Maybe an experience that led to your career choice? Sounds like she would make a great bi-polar villain in a children's book or any book really.|
|Reviewed by Inspire Hope
|William, the " Unforgiving" is so real, and touches me, yet I pray that you will find it in your heart to forgive the wrong that was done to you!! Thank you for sharing your story and for being real, people find hope when you are real. God bless you!!|
|Reviewed by Denise Edwards
|Adults who abuse children, and that was a mild form of abuse, they never understand that the smallest amount of fear and anger pushed upon a child can be traumatic, and the effect of childhood trauma can last a very long time. A very good story, Willaim.|
|Reviewed by Sheila Roy
Now here is a fine example of a woman using her prejudice in her favor. I've never understood why adults take advantage of kids. I enjoyed seeing a glimpse of the retired officer here, with the use of "My mother dispatched..." lol. At least you know you were innocent. I think you labeled her well. Hugs~
|Reviewed by Lois Christensen
|You were so innocent of stealing the watch and that old lady was very rude to you and did not even thank you for returning it to the girl. Such people should not even be here to act like that. No thanks from her ever.|
|Reviewed by m j hollingshead
|enjoyed the read
|Reviewed by Gwendolyn Thomas Gath
This short story was indeed sorrowful just simply sad.
The images of you and the entire scenario played across my mind like a movie. Just to think about how sad you must have felt and been broke my heart and I know yours was.
Awwww, well at least you were able to write about it.
Wishing you all the best and lots of love and happiness too.
((( SEMPER FI )))
|Reviewed by Olita Williams
|A story shared. Now I know a little more about what makes you, you. Thank you.|
|Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
|Excellent story, William; very well penned! BRAVO!
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :D
|Reviewed by John Leko
|...I believe we have all held moments such as these...the watch was un-for-giving...because you found it...yours to keep... and stolen....the memories never will be...but always there...unfair.
|Reviewed by Bernice Angoh
|Hahahahahaha William, I know this is a painfull memoery but I can't help imagining how that little lady looked like. Hope you one day forgive her, she has paid in full for what she did to you trust me...|
|Reviewed by RaeLynn Teller
|You just took each and every one of us back to that one horrible moment in our childhood that has made us who we are. Yes, it was terrible but I am sure gave you a resolve to never, never inflict that sort of pain on a child. With that in your heart your life as we know it now was formed.
That old bitch helped make you who you are today.
Ironic, isn't it?
|Reviewed by Jackie (Micke) Jinks
|Sad remembrance, William. But don't you see? SHE had to accuse YOU in order for her theft from you to appear true; she had no shame. Forgive her now for the lesson you learned: thieves come in all shapes, sizes, and ages. Hope you didn't have to go back to that store!
|Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan
|such a painful memory--i am sorry for that--forgiveness comes hard sometimes|
|Reviewed by Amber Moonstone
So vivid your memory of a traumatic moment in your childhood. This came to the surface now, because you are able to handle this. Look you wrote about it, got it out and now it will not be such a painful memory any longer. We here at AD, will tear her apart! lol There is justice in this after all.
Hope all is well, miss you much.
Peace, love, and light
|Reviewed by Georg Mateos
|I had in my childhood a teacher that had made her life's goal to make my life miserable, she did, almost, I was one of those little firecrackers that took shit from nobody once they crossed that "patience red line"
But to my satisfaction, I heard that she, in her death bed wanted to say sorry for making me her special witch project.
As PeeWee said, it its amazing how we can't forget.
|Reviewed by Mr. Ed
|It often amazes me just how powerful some of our childhood memories are. Some of them seem to stay with us forever, and when we recall them, they seem like they just happened yesterday. And I hope you can find a much more pleasant one today, my friend.|
|Reviewed by c lea harris
|It is so unfair, when people jump to conclusions, and usually they have no idea what the true details are.
When people look at me, they automatically think I starve myself in order to be the size I am, when in reality, I have to eat about every two hours, and the people who knoe me very well can back me up.
There is a difference in jumping to conclusions and going by instincts, I was accused of jumping to conclusuion just recently, no I said, I was going by my instincts and they were right, and I caught my ex-boyfriend seeing other women from an onlime dating service, but of course, he won't admit it, but instincts have kept many people alive, espcially when you are a person in law ennforcement,