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Shane Ward
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Member Since: Feb, 2003

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Books
• Stop Smoking: Diary of a Quitter

• Numerology:Making it Work for You

• Walking the Path

• The Philosophy of the Tarot for the 21st Century

• Numerology. Making it Work for You

• The Philosophy of the Tarot for the 21st Century


Short Stories
• The File

• Garry Quitter and the Philosophers Drone

• When music was mightier than the pen

• Publish and be Damned (Chapter 33 of Walking the Path)

• Phantoms and Ghosts (Chapter 24 of Walking the Path)

• Magic and Mayhem (Chapter 20 of Walking the Path)

• The Devil. From The Philosophy of the Tarot

• The Grunt National (From A-Z of Farts)

• Towers and Terrors (Chapter 10 of Walking the Path)

• Altars and Altercations (Chapter 6 of Walking the Path)


Articles
• The Barbault Warnings

• Credit Crunch 2009: The Eventual Outcome of Capitalism.

• The Barbault Scale

• Neptune Ingress into Pisces 2012

• Dyslexia: The Wrong Impression

• Pluto Ingress into Capricorn

• The Owl and The Pussycat: a Conspiracy Theory

• Pretty Girl: From Pop Song to Symphony

• Mundane Astrology: a Jupiter / Uranus Cycle

• Stop the Drug Market: Letter to the European Commission


Poetry
• Parrots of the Caribbean

• Don't Read This Poem

• I Never Won The Lottery Again

• You've Gotta Laugh Eh?

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• When Children Trick or Treat

• A Cetter of Lomplaint

• I Found a Piece of Toast in my Pocket

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• Numerology book released Jan 2005

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Recent stories by Shane Ward
Phantoms and Ghosts (Chapter 24 of Walking the Path)
Magic and Mayhem (Chapter 20 of Walking the Path)
Towers and Terrors (Chapter 10 of Walking the Path)
Altars and Altercations (Chapter 6 of Walking the Path)
Shattered Bones and Egos (Chapter 5 of Walking the Path)
Nightmares and Nomenclatures (Chapter 3 of Walking the Path)
Brithday Boys Don't Cry. Chapter 2 of Walking the Path
Boiled Bacon and Peas Pudding Chapter 1 of Walking the Path
Publish and be Damned (Chapter 33 of Walking the Path)
When music was mightier than the pen
The File
Garry Quitter and the Philosophers Drone
The Devil. From The Philosophy of the Tarot
The Grunt National (From A-Z of Farts)
           >> View all 16
If I Were a Rich Man (Chapter 4 of Walking the Path)
By Shane Ward
Last edited: Friday, October 09, 2009
Posted: Monday, May 31, 2004
This short story is rated "G" by the Author.

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Chapter 4 of my memoirs, 'Walking the Path'.

Chapter IV
 


 

If I were a Rich Man
 


In 1966, Alfie Bass hit the UK charts with a song called 'If I were a Rich Man', from the musical 'Fiddler on the Roof'. My Dad bought a copy of the record - a vinyl record that played on the gramophone at 45RPM (revolutions per minute). He bought hit singles occasionally so that he could learn up to date songs to play in his band.

I sat down in the living room with him to listen to the song. It was a song unlike any I had heard - or even taken notice of. It started with a simple riff and accompanied Alfie speaking:

"Oh Lord, you made many, many poor people. I realise, of course, its no shame to be poor… but there's no great honour in it either. So what would be so terrible if I had but a small fortune"

I found myself entranced by the notion of this song. As a child I had been taught to say prayers before bedtime but this was the first time I knew of a grown up praying. And then Alfie Bass started singing, "If I were a rich man. Ayaba derba derba derba derba zerba derba der. All Day long I viddibiddibum. If I were a wealthy man…"

I listened intently to every word and tone. It was a wonderful song with silly sounding words.

When it finished I asked my Dad if I could play it again. On the second time round I checked with everything that I had heard. I listened to the power of his voice towards the end when he beseeches of God, "Lord who made the lion and the lamb. You decreed I should be what I am. Would it spoil some vast eternal plan!?…"

A plan! God. There was obviously more to this God thing than I knew about. The words burned into my head like a computer download. "If… I were a weal-thy… maaaaaaaaan!"

The arm lifted off of the record and clicked back onto its mounting. I got off the chair in the living room and walked the few steps to the kitchen where both Mum and Dad were and said, "Mum. I know the words to that record".

Walking The Path is now available in paperback See http://www.shaneward.co.uk for details


 

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Reviewed by m j hollingshead 7/26/2004
i like your style
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 6/1/2004
nice addition to your memoirs, shane; enjoyed reading! thanks for sharing!~

(((HUGS))) and love, your tx. friend, karen lynn. :D



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