The journing continues with finding the child that is in all of us.

Chapter 3

The Child Within

By Shelley L. Moss


The room where the woman lies is dark. Shadows dangle on the walls and on
the woman's bed. Candles are lit, and the air is filled with their aroma.
The room is peaceful, with gentle music playing in the background. Native
stones lay close to the woman's chest. Flutes and drums fill the air. Her
stones represent strength while the music of the flutes and drums playing in
the distance is her personal guide inward. The world around her begins to
close as her eyes slowly shut. Her mind begins its inward journey, searching
for the light that is way beyond the darkness and the cold. The woman had
learned deep meditation through her research of native culture.


The woman's mind must be completely empty in order to go deeper. To learn
and find her journey of peace and with mind now empty, body totally relaxed,
she gets lost in the music. Her body feels as if it is floating, becoming as
light as a feather. The journey inward has begun.

As the books she had read had instructed, she could see her body drifting
into a hole in the ground, the hole which she used to enjoy. But now, it is
not as pleasant as she had remembered. The reasons for going are different,
for there is pain and loss. As the guitars call her inward, the body is no
longer lying on the bed; it is floating toward the hole, pulling and
intertwining her body until it surfaces on the dark side, cold and lifeless.
Feeling stranded, she looks over toward the sunny side where the ocean and
breeze call to her. How did her mind become divided between the dark and the
light?

The ground cold and damp beneath her feet, she climbs upon the nearest rock
and stares over to what used to be. She calls to her angel, but where is
she? Though searching with her eyes, she cannot find her. Pulling her
knees up to her chest, she begins to cry softly.

Out of nowhere she hears a faint childish giggle. She slides down the rock
and lets her soul lead the way. Standing on the edge of the dark side of her
mind is a little girl about to cross over to the sunny side.

"Wait! I don't like being here alone," the woman says. "Where do you come
from and why are you here?"

The little girl turns around, looks up, and simply says, "I am you! We are
one." The woman looks at her closely, and can see the same eyes and nose as
her own.

She jumps back in fear. How could this be?

"Why fear me?" The girl says. "For then, you must fear yourself. I am here
to help you remember the good. Your angel sent me to play with you."

The little girl takes the woman's hand and leads her to a huge rock, and
they begin to climb it together, laughing. The woman is confused, but she
trusts the little girl. Once at the top, they sit side by side while
catching their breath. Suddenly, the woman's angel appears, sitting by the woman’s
side. Her face was so gentle and caring.

"Come," says the little girl, pulling at her hands. The woman looks at her
angel, and she nods for her to follow. Going back down the hill, the woman
cannot help but wonder what this is all about. The angels remain on top of
the huge rock as they work their way toward the edge, by the dark water. The
little girl sits down, puts her feet in, and begins wading. She giggles with
a bright, gleeful face. The woman, not sure what to do, decides to follow
her. She puts her feet into the dark cold water slowly and wades out toward
the little girl. The girl's eyes become huge as she calls, "Look!" Starting
from the edge of the dark water, a whole new color transpires. The water
begins to feel warmer.

Within minutes, the dark cold water becomes as blue as the sea and perfectly
warm. Not realizing it, the two begin splashing each other, laughing, and
swimming. Time passes quickly, and the woman notices that her angel is
floating toward her. Once near, her angel tells her to follow her. The little
girl gets out of the water first and waves goodbye to the woman, who is
trying to keep up with her angel.

On the other side of the dark half of her mind is the biggest rock the woman
has ever seen. The angel appear at the very bottom.

The angel began to speak. "You have walked and you have seen God's beauty.
You have played as a child again and have shared your journey with her. This
rock is your final step to healing. You must do this part fully on your own,
and it will be the hardest part of your journey, but the Lord and I will not
be far away. The rock you climbed with the child was her journey years ago.
Now you have yet another rock to climb. Look around you. See all these rocks
and the different sizes and shapes? These you have conquered, but life is
always full of obstacles that shall fall into your path."

The woman cannot but help look upward, afraid and lost. This will be hard,
and going it alone will certainly take some time, but she will do it if it
means being the woman she was and the mother she needs to be again. Hearing
that familiar giggle, she turns and sees the little girl run across to the
other side.

"Dear one," the angel says, "you will not come out of this the same woman
that you used to be. You will come out stronger and wiser than ever before.
As for being the Mother you need to be, that has never left you and it shall
never leave you."

The angel takes her hand and sits her down. "You must go home now to your
world, and continue your journey. Close
your eyes and rest, my child, for it will be needed." As the angel runs
her gentle fingers through the woman’s hair, her eyes became heavy. Sleep overtakes
her.

The angel watches her sleep until it is time to leave. The angel
notices the flower and pictures of her children inside the woman's pocket.
The flower was given to this woman by her angel when her journey first
began, and the pictures of her children she carried always for they were
what kept her going.

This is a good sign, for it means that she is hanging on to her love for
them, and if she wants it badly enough, this mountain behind them would be
climbed in no time. The angel looks over to the other side and watches the
child within, playing and laughing. Pleased and ready to go, the angel lay
another flower next to the woman as she disappears, leaving the sleeping
woman at the bottom of the mountain. The woman slowly returns home with a child's
laughter ringing in her ear...

Fine Art By
Mark Arian