Do you remember your early childhood when you were curious, laughed with ease and experienced lots of joy?
For most of us as children, to survive we modified our behavior and who we really were. We wisely adapted to the situations in our family and environment; successfully accomplished that task, and have survived into adulthood. If we keep practicing living up to other people expectations, seeking approval from others, and honoring other people’s wishes over our own heart’s desires we will turn such behaviors into a habit. If we are not conscious of our habits and do not change them, we will automatically repeat the same patterns in our adult life.
Why are we not comfortable to speak our truth? Maybe we were ridiculed as a child by our friends, or punished by our parents or an authority at school for being out of line. We now may feel anxiety (memory of our childhood) when we attempt to speak our truth, and as a habit we avoid such situations and then wonder why we feel a heaviness inside. As an adult it is important to look into our habits that could be an impediment to what we choose to become.
I was born a magical kid.
I once stood out among my friends.
I once was playful.
I once could think and act fast.
I once was proud of who I was and
it showed in my smile.
I was energetic and laughed easily and often.
Over time I believed that I needed to fit in
to be liked by others.
Over time I believed that I needed to dim my inner light
to be accepted by others
who have lost contact with their own magical self.
Now what and who I have turned into?
I am consumed by shame, guilt, grief and sorrow.
I walk lifelessly
with a bent frame.
I carry lots of baggage
keeping me from playing.
Instead of hearing my childhood laughter and enthusiasm
I hear myself saying...
“Oh no”, “I can’t”, “I don’t wanna”.
I speak with a soft voice
so I do not offend anyone
or attract attention to myself.
Today, I resurrect my real self!
Today, I walk through the seemingly long illusion of pleasing others.
I now use my strong voice to define my boundaries.
I now use a strong voice to express my truth.
I now take pride in my laughter and playfulness.
I now have dropped the heavy baggage.
I now stand tall and bright.
Welcome to wise, curious, playful
Copyright . 2012 by Shervin Hojat