G.A. Williams’ Theory Making: Immersion in the Occult(part 2)
Experience … is not mere awareness of a succession of presented objects, it is a awareness of a succession determined by a controlling interest or purpose. The order of my experience is not something simply given from without, it iscontrolled and determined by subjective interest from within.1
A Memorable Trip to Europe - summer of l959 – 22 years old
Despite intense fears I somehow managed to travel around Europe on my own [on my beloved Lambretta motor scooter].The trip covered 7000 miles. I started in Italy, then to Yugoslavia, Austria, Switzerland, France, Germany, Denmark, Sweden, Finland winding up in England. What began in terror wound up in an overall feeling of surprising mastery. Amazingly I put it all together – the stars were in alignment – but I couldn’t sustain it.
New York State Employment Service end of 1959-1961
I became an employment interviewer in civil service. At first I was enthusiastic about my work. But by the end of the second year I was feeling under-challenged. But despite my clear dissatisfaction I felt stuck - uncertain as to what else to do.
The Lure of the Occult 1960 – 196122-24 years old
After graduating from college and my therapy, I was still preoccupied with trying to make meaningful connections with myself, others, and the world.However, having ‘failed’ psychotherapy and having suffered a crisis of information overload, I was ripe for the lure of the Occult.
I had to make important life choices.But feeling more divided than ever - confused, and riddled with doubts - I needed something solid to hold onto transcending myself. It was in this context that when I first came upon a bookshop specializing in the esoteric occult it was love at first sight.
The first day I discovered Mason’s psychology and occult bookshop in NYC, I
instantaneously fell under his spell when he referred to the fact that my mercury was in Capricorn.He said that was a good place for it to be, predicting that I should look forward to becoming a teacher, adding that teaching was indeed a “noble and important profession. I noted his 360 degree difference from my father.
Mason said that occult phenomena was interesting but of more importance is the
esoteric philosophy. He said all you have to do is to believe that its first assumption of the oneness of everything being spiritualized is absolutely real and all else follows. That in this context, phenomena such as astrology, tarot, kabala, numerology, are each systems by which the fundamental spiritualized unity is revealed to mankind.
I thought of other men I had known who, like my ex -therapist, had initially excited me
me and stirred the depths of my soul. As I turned to leave the ‘magical atmosphere’ of Mason’s occult bookstore I knew I was instantly “hooked.”
My girlfriend at that time, A, was not as thrilled as I was to have met Mason and his
strange world. In fact my girl friend found him to be decidedly off putting. I was decidedly disappointed that she did not share my same degree of intense enthusiasm.