Just Be!
It's funny about how you meet that special someone in your life at the most unexpected time. I was getting my hair cut and colored one day without any thought other than, I really, really need to have my roots colored. Picture this, a woman sitting in the hair salon chair with her hair sticking up as if she had stuck her finger in an electrical socket. Now come on, this is supposed to be a place where you can look your worst so that you can look your best - right?
The woman who cuts and colors my hair was also working with a gentlemen sitting to the left of me (he was preoccupied with his iphone.) I paid him little mind, why would I - this was my space to just be. When, out of the blue, my hair "dresser" (supposed friend) - introduces me to the man, her next customer. After squirming with internal protest (I was thinking … HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME) - I put on a smile and politely said hello. Then I quickly turned my head to my hairdresser and said "ARE YOU CRAZY!)
Well, the rest is history, as they say. This man and I began to talk. He liked my name, Laurel, and asked what color flower it was (clever pick-up line if I say so myself). I care-freely said, "if you really want to know who I am, go to www.essenceoflaurel.com, my website”... knowing that it truly represented the woman I am today, including a picture of me without my hair standing up at all angles. (Thank goodness I also wasn't having my eyebrows colored, because then I would have looked like a combination of the Marx brothers being electrocuted.)
It took a few seconds for this guy to go to my web site (thank you iphone.) I watched in amazement, once he found the site, as to how he reacted to my art and poetry. It seemed to startle him in a good way, and it was then that we actually began to talk. We could have been at a coffee shop or having a glass of wine together, the imagery of where we were quickly faded away. It was what we were "seeing" in each that piqued our interest. And, it didn't hurt that he had a velvet voice that went right through me.
The long and the short of it is that we did meet for dinner, then a movie, and then on and on and on. What I was experiencing/feeling started to frighten me, because I wasn't, repeat wasn't, seeing any red flags or looking for someone. Having spent the last year plus getting back on my feet after losing my husband, and building a new life for myself ... I didn't want to "lose my freedom." You know - I am Woman Hear Me Roar! What did this mean to me? I was re-emerging and discovering the woman I am today, and didn't want to go into a relationship that would sidetrack me on this journey. I had made new friends, discovered my creative spirit and spiritual "side", and was incorporating joy back into my life.
Well folks, someone very important in my life said to me "Laurel, if you are afraid of losing your freedom, you are NOT TRULY FREE! ... Just Be." Yikes, those words said it all - I got it! So, I relaxed and decided to let the relationship and each day form itself as it is meant to be. This man, whom I care very deeply about, is partnering with me in a wondrous way because he understands my need to keep true to my essence - the woman who has emerged today. And, I understand that he needs to do the same for himself.
Romance in my 60’s has a lot of unexpected benefits. Time compresses, wisdom is stored within and called upon, and I have time to "Just Be." I thought I would be invisible after my husband's death. What I didn't realize is that I just needed to look into the mirror of life and see me. The rest has been falling into place - one day, one hour, one minute at a time.