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James J. Marry

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The Music of God
by James J. Marry   

Last edited: Friday, August 01, 2003
Posted: Wednesday, November 13, 2002

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God doesn't hide from us if we want to believe so why would He hide from a person who hasn't found Him yet? A scientific analysis that many would not expect after some introspection by the author.



The Music of God                              
By James J. Marry


Many readers who have come to know my works will exclaim that I am schizophrenic in my writing. They know my popular works like "Shut Up" to be violent and sexual whereas my Christian works such as "Our Father" are inspired by an obvious love of Jesus Christ and the Word. It would be difficult, if not prideful, for me to consider ever being able to explain the relationship to either reader of my works. I don’t believe that I will attempt that now, though some light could be shed on that subject I think.

Recently a woman that I have great respect for asked me of this dichotomy for a writer. I resist sharing her name with you since I have not requested her permission to do so. In response, I explained to her that I have traveled many miles to become the child of God that I am today. In that, I realize that a great deal of inspiration towards the truth came directly to me from a history of sin. A slow realization of the cost for this incorrect behavior led me to a year and a half that I lived in mostly prayer and isolation. I often describe this as my time in the monastery. I spoke to God daily and I heard His message clearly. The Bible was my one and only confidant and I learned to love the Word very dearly. This experience was brought on by some horrible misfortunes in my life that I chose to turn into an opportunity to seek my God on a very personal basis. I believe that I am still achieving that level of personal communication with the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ today. I am thankful for every drop of inspiration that I am worthy of receiving and I keep my sins under close watch with a clear memory.

I explained this to the woman who asked me for my own tale of guidance and I gave to her the message that I believe God has prepared me to offer. I may not have detailed the message as far as I will now, but I told her that every Christian is on a path to reach God. We are all called at different times to conform to the God’s path and we are each on our path in different ways. God gives each of us gifts that make our conformance to his will possible in specific ways. As with the armor that Paul gives us in Ephesians, God has given me my pen to reach some of His children. Notice that I clearly state that my pen reaches "some" of His children.

In essence, I told her that I was not called upon to reach all of God’s children. My tools have been honed to reach certain ones. Can I tell you who those children are? I am sorry that I can’t. It could make my mission of words easier if I could say who my ministry will reach, but possibly not as effective as my own words have been so far. I look at the tools that God has chosen for me on a daily basis and I realize that my preferred audience is definitely not one of piety and pureness. No, my audience is very much like this woman who has sinned, wishes forgiveness, and lives to glorify Christ today. I say this with one basic difference in that I have also sinned and live to glorify Christ. But I am certain that I have been forgiven of all my sins including those that I have yet to commit. I ask for this forgiveness every day. My growth in Christ our Lord has promised me the forgiveness that I have accepted and I hope that I have given my friend a road map for discovering that truth also.

I realize that this seems to be a trivial self-aggrandizement of my own status with God. I apologize if I have led any of you to believe that I would consider writing about my beliefs in Jesus Christ with any egotism in mind. I endlessly try to assure myself that I am clearly not acting in conceit by editing and re-editing of any work that might be read by a Christian attempting to find his or her way along the path of truth. Thomas Aquinas gives me the very root for that sin as the strongest and wiliest of all Satan’s attempts to ensnare me and I feel I must rebuke him and his favorite mechanic- Pride. I pray that any of my audience can feel his clutch as well and avoid him.

In response to that comment, I think it is worthy that I relive my promise to you that I am carrying this path forward. I know that I can be circular in my logic but it all leads directly towards one truth. Jesus is our salvation and he wants each of us to know this in our body, soul and spirit. I address this message with Christ’s blessing towards each one of my brothers and sisters who are at the edge of disavowing their Christianity. I pray that you have each mustered the strength to read this far and that what seem like idle ramblings will carry you further in your very redeemable faith. At least, I ask that you read on in curiosity about the Music of God.

My birth to this world was to a very unpredictable and unbalanced existence. My family turmoil was endless and I spent much time learning to take care of myself. Though I could never allow myself to recognize it, I have been told that I suffered great abuse in my childhood. I rarely allowed myself to depend on anyone or anything. Love was determined to be the greatest gift that a human could give or receive and was highly temporal. The clock began ticking whenever someone said, "I love you". Death reared its head with such perpetuity and regularity that I became numbed to any ability I had to feel loss. I even expected to be left behind by those who claimed their hearts were bonded to mine and in many ways I was rewarded with the pain that this self-perpetuating truth would repeatedly teach me. My Catholicism taught me to fear God and I did. I incorrectly learned that God was very difficult to love.

I really suspected that I was not one of God’s children. That some other people had been given that prize and I was left out of the framework. I strove to learn what religion I needed to attain to feel the love of this one powerful God and I wrestled with the issue mightily. I prayed and I prayed and I prayed. Nothing.

I write science fiction because I like to think. I believe my imagination is a product of my knowledge and my hope. Satan knows this well so I feel justified enough to share this character flaw with you. In this fondness of my basic human talent, I opened the door to weakness and I thought, "How can I possibly believe that there is a God?" Please bear with me since I am quite aware that this statement is the basest form of blasphemy. I would add that I know this better than you might imagine. I say this to assure you that I am not operating with the sin of Pride. I am ashamed that I was ever capable of approaching this concept. I honestly thought that I needed to investigate this dilemma and I may very well have had the Enemy within me as I may have had Jesus Christ pulling my strings to get me closer to truth of the Word. The rest of the story could illustrate this thought further.

For the fallen Christian who has discarded Christ on the basis of the religions that haven’t brought you any closer to God than when you first began to pay attention, let me say this. I think that I could have fallen as far at this point as most any of you might have. In active sin, I may even have fallen farther though my pride does restrain me from saying just how far that was. Additionally, such a confession being restated could only serve to hurt people that I care about who truly are not required to share this personal pain. Please, remember that I am forgiven in the blood of Jesus Christ.

Also, though the question permeated me everyday of my life, I never once claimed or fully revoked the existence of God. I think of this fact as critical though the door to the doubt of His existence was very open. A tricky Lucifer was reveling in this fact, I’m sure. I would read newspapers and magazines. I watched movies and television. I listened to radio and disc jockeys. I searched the world for an answer to my quest. I couldn’t see God though. I continued my education in electronics and I worked harder everyday. I felt a blackness that this reality or dimension might be all that there really was. My own music, the guitar, became leaden strings and my singing voice became very stale. I had been a singer in New York City nightclubs as a kid, and now creating that beauty was impossible even for my own enjoyment. I thought that tradition and superstition were overpowering my strong mental ability to grasp the reality of an answer that I felt was right before my eyes.

My salvation came from a school where I had never expected to find it. During my tenure playing New York City nightclubs I had found great music playing with a guitarist with a very sweet sound. We had gone our separate ways years before and met again by chance while I was serving the Air Force in Angeles, the Philippines. I had reached the peak of my God dilemma only months earlier. He made a very simple statement to justify his strong belief that God was dead and that Satan ruled the Earth. I didn’t understand his meaning at all, but in my own logic (given to me by a dead God); I was enabled to reason through the truth of the statement and to be guided back to the right path.

The guitarist said that all the proof he needed of the power of Satan could be summed up in less than one word. He picked up his guitar and he plucked the second string. He said, "Did you hear that?"

I regretfully and curiously answered "Yes. I did."

"That is the musical note ‘A’." He continued. "That was the note ‘A’ five thousand years ago. And that will be the musical note ‘A’ five thousand years in the future. I made that note. It might have been called something else, but it is still the same note."

Now, you ask me how can that possibly prove to me that there is indeed a God? I mean, many of you can easily see some of the logic of my former guitar friend, but how can that same insignificant sound begin to prove to me that there is a God? God shows himself in all of the simplest things if only we open our eyes to see them.

Before we arrive at the brass tacks of the logical explanation of our God’s existence, allow me to clarify. I don’t doubt that ‘A’ was probably called something else five thousand years ago. I surely won’t attempt to argue that ‘A’ won’t be renamed before five thousand years pass. The Chinese surely don’t call this note ‘A’ either. But the influence of the statement is that regardless of a name, the notes remain the same. That simple note has always been the same note and will always be the same note is what I was told. I have since discontinued my relationship with this idolater but I can never ignore this truth. The note is a whole note, not a minor, not diminished and not a seventh. It is definitely an ‘A’ note. It fits exactly between a ‘G’ note and a ‘B flat’ in the order of scales. And these scales have never changed and they never will. Is there a logic to that order? No. The ‘B flat’ proves that lack of logic by the fact that it must follow the ‘A’ and precede the ‘C’ to complete scales without making every listener in the room slightly queasy. ‘B flat’ is exactly half a frequency level off from where every mathematician would expect the note to be to create symmetry. Yet the scales are there and have always been that way and will always be that way. Why?

There is no good answer to that question that I have ever heard. Maybe that mystery alone can prove God exists. But the explanation of frequency in this regard is even freakier. Pardon the simplicity of a light Physics lesson. There are two types of electricity: Direct Current and Alternating Current. Direct Current is a matter of push and pull with every positive force being equaled in every circuit by a negative force. This could be another proof, but let’s progress. When we look at Alternating Current we may discover a more evident truth of His existence in the understanding of a major component to every note and sound that man or animal can ever hear- frequency. Our ears take vibrations in the form of frequency and interpret them in our brains as specific and meaningful intelligence. You might say that sound is power and our receivers decode the power.

A curved line that is similar to the capital letter "S" lying upon its back exemplifies the symbol for AC, or alternating current. The symbol signifies that the signal of current does not travel in a push- pull straight line like D.C. current, but travels in a circle down its conductor in a measurement of cycles per second- also known as hertz. The sideways "S" signifies a linear measurement of the circular path that AC will travel by. The force is continual but can run at different speeds meaning that it will complete the circle only so many times in each second differently. Hence the term- frequency. How many circles of energy happen in a second is the thought that illustrates this concept of measurement.

The frequency of each sound determines the note that our own ear hears. When the guitarist hits that second string on his instrument, the sound that we hear is the frequency or cycles per second that our brains- each and every one of our brains- will decode as the note ‘A’, assuming the guitar is properly tuned. We hear the frequency with millions upon millions of different people circumferencing 24,000 miles around a planet with thousands of independent cultures and we all hear that tone the same way. We all recognize that same note and when it sounds again, we will recognize the note as the same sound if we need to. A dial tone can tell you where you are; they can be so individual in sound.

If this guitar was not properly tuned, then the playing of any chord or tone the instrument would reproduce would cause distress in any human on earth. Let me repeat that important fact. The guitar that doesn’t have the right tuning will distress every human on earth. Think about it. How could this be mechanical? How could this be so universal? How could this do anything less than prove that God exists?

The Bible tells us that music was around before mankind existed. God created music for his own enjoyment and to glorify Him. I have read that Lucifer, the bright shining angel of God, was the chosen angel to create all music before man’s fall. He then became Satan and was cast down to Sheol- the Pit- Hell. Surely, Satan can find ways to use music for his cause to bring as many men and women away from God as possible. But also remember that music was created for God’s purposes in the first place- to glorify our Lord. God enjoyed music before we were created and God enjoys music now as He will when the Earth is gone. The proof of all of this is in the simplest of logic.

Music is universal. The scales are universal. The tuning of an instrument is universal. Each note is universal. Our hearing is universal. And our creation is universal. I mean to say that we were all spun from one thread regardless of whether you agree that thread was named Adam or not. The possibility will be argued that this fact is only coincidental or that it is a biological factor influenced by the electrical energy that each of our bodies carries. And where did that coincidental energy begin? Could it be argued that the same energy that offers us comfort from birth to death with music is proof of destiny as opposed to coincidence? Of course it could though I am not ignorant of atheistic obstinacy. I offer this argument for those who have fallen away from the Lord and not to those who deny Him. I can pray for the salvation of all mankind. I can not force even the smallest to accept salvation even if I base my arguments entirely in scientific fact. I realize that I may not have used unquestionable logic in my argument since I am a faithful believer. My logic is born from a shard of the conviction that Jesus Christ came to save my soul from oblivion, so I can not say I am entirely unbiased.

I can say that my explanation is not designed to make any individual- whether scientist, baker, physicist, painter or thief- uncomfortable. I do believe that if my line of thought makes a person angry or uncomfortable, that they should take a little bit of what I feel may be good advice. Look into your discomfort. There might be more to this debate than you might be able to see through your emotion at this time. If there is more to it, that discomfort could be the key to forever for you. Maybe not, but I’d like to hope so.

I hope that my example has proven that destiny is a more likely compatriot since there is absolutely no indication that coincidence could have been motivated to occur by any means whatsoever to create the mathematical relationship of sound, notes and frequency. Of course, you could choose to think that speech follows the same theory, but the common logic is that mankind’s life became easier because of our ability to communicate. How much easier is life for humanity because music exists? Life is nicer because music exists, but I think any argument that it is easier will fail dramatically.

For those of you who argue with my circular logic because you see flaws in my thinking, I will pray for you. The truth tends to be very simple in most cases as opposed to conflicting or complicated. Mysteries can have the most simple of answers if we can accept that simplicity. I ask God to gift you with some insight that His existence is very real and that forever is at hand. For those of you who can understand this riddle, I pray that you find a way to use your gift and show another human being the path that God has chosen for them to follow. Please feel free to offer my essay since I write for you. And I pray that all of you have at least been given the only thing that I can truly offer to any of you- something to think about. Amen..

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Reviewed by Valerie Boggess 1/18/2003
James, A wondrous writing indeed. It moved my spirit. God is working a mighty work thru your writings. I too am embarking on a journey for the Lord. May His name be praised...Valerie M. Boggess
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 11/13/2002
a good write!
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