Colorless As My Thoughts
edited: Friday, May 11, 2007
By Barbara Kasey Smith
Rated "G" by the Author.
Posted: Friday, May 11, 2007
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Dad's message drove me up the spiraling lane,
Snow puffs across a driveway entry,
like childhood phantoms invade my mind.
The heavens, a pitch-black cavity,
against glinting potholes of ice
along a lighted highway.
Dad's message drives me up the spiraling lane,
the narrow passage is as colorless
as my blank thoughts.
His drawn face greets me,
bits and pieces of the sofa's motif
scars his cheeks.
More than once, years ago,
I studied those patterns on Mother's face.
A half bottle of wine,
an empty pack of smokes sets on the end table.
Dad's intent look utters an instant query,
lines around his eyes notch inward,
murky blue eyes, a dour twitchy grin,
emerges to warn me.
A eerie silence throughout the house,
family pictures on the wall gawk.
Sensing a distress,
his Boston terrier nuzzles his long legs.
Dad fidgets and then,
"Ben, gave up his ghost today...
I need to be with you...
hear your voice, see your face,
I'm lost without his.
Web Site: poetrypoem.com/smith
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|Reviewed by Gwendolyn Thomas Gath
Barbara this was quite an offering filled with subliminal eludings. Your colorful descriptions and imagery were more than substantial from the introduction to the conclusion of your poetic narrative.
Appreciated the read and thank you,
|Reviewed by Mary Coe
|Reviewed by MaryGrace Patterson
|Such vivid images are shown in the sad write Barbara. Exceptional! .......M|
|Reviewed by Joyce Bowling
|Such a sad write and hard one to express, but you've penned it well my friend. Only God knows the hearts and intentions of others, as well as the secrets that many hide within and shelter in their hearts. Trust in Him, He'll help carry your load!
|Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan
|a very tough write-i am sorry as well-so good to have the ability to write and express the emotions, it helps me|
|Reviewed by H. Lena Jones
|Much sadness and pain in this write, Barbara. So sorry. Perhaps your dad was really reaching out for help. Still, it's best to forgive and release past hurts to our heavenly Father...so that you can move on and be happy.
Much love and hugs
|Reviewed by George Carroll
|You wove a poignant tale in this one.|
|Reviewed by Jeanette Cooper
|There are a lot of images in this poem, and it has the voice of deep thought. Your "Phantoms" of heaven was an interesting description. I enjoyed reading your poem.|
|Reviewed by Mr. Ed
|A most powerful pen, Barbara.|