Some people would say that finding that perfect man or woman is like searching for a needle in the haystack, right? Wrong, its not that perfect man or woman we are so critical in finding but the idea of perfection that we are seeking. Well unfortuniately we are not living in a perfect world and life is not perfect and neither are the people we love or hope to love.

We all as human beings have our faults no matter how hard we try we will never reach that scale of perfection. God didn't create us that way. He gave us free will to choose what is right and wrong and it is up to us to determine which road we shall take. We all are guilty of imperfection so how can expect each other to be perfect when we ourselves are not.

If we constantly expect something outside the scope of reality than our dreams will certainly turn into nightmares. To expect perfection from another human being is like expecting it never to rain again. On the other hand should we just give up and accept being hurt, cheated on and lied to and used? Of course not, we as individuals must take responsibility for our own actions in our persuit of happiness and stop depending solely on others to make us happy. We must look within ourselves and strive to be the individual that we are seeking.

 If we expect truth then we must be truthful. If we want trust then we must be trustworthy. If we want honesty and integrity in our relationships then we should have honesty and integrity in us, therefore when we encounter that special person we have fallen in love with the qualities that we desire and so desperately seek is brought into the relationship. In return not making us perfect but instead giving us the opportunity to persue the level of happiness and stability we want in our lives.

 Good relationships envolves making not only a connection but a commitment with a person who has the same values and qualities that you share. When you find that special person be aware that everything will not be as they say "peaches and cream" and you will live happily ever after as they do in your favorite love story or novel. That's completely a fantasy, however you can experience as much joy and happiness along the way overcoming the bumps and the bruises as long as you stay connected to the values, commitment and integrity that you have instill within yourself.

Being happy and fulfilled begins on the inside of each individual. We all heard the phrase "charity begins at home" and it holds true . So if you are searching for that special someone, fill your soul with what you are looking for in that person and you will find that man or woman of your dreams.

Janie De Coster
Author of
Man of My Dreams?